Abiding: The Anatomy of a Birthday

Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.

And in Your book they all were written,

The days fashioned for me,

When as yet there were none of them.

- Psalm 139:16

A father of the fatherless,

a defender of widows,

Is God in His holy habitation.

God sets the solitary in families;

He brings out those who are bound into prosperity;

But the rebellious dwell in a dry land.

- Psalm 68:5, 6

There is a way that seems right to a man,
but its end is the way to death.
- Proverbs 14:12 (ESV)

"Your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying,
'This is the way, walk in it,'
Whenever you turn to the right hand
Or whenever you turn to the left.'"

- Isaiah 30:21




Just as the Father has loved Me,
I have also loved you;
abide in My love.
If you keep My commandments,
you will abide in My love:
just as I have kept My Father's commandments
and abide in His love.
These things I have spoken to you
so that My joy may be in you,
and that your joy may be made full.
- John 15:9-11



So teach us to number our days,
That we may gain a heart of wisdom.
-Psalm 90:11



He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High
Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the Lord,
"He is my fortress;
My God, in Him will I trust."
-Psalm 91:1,2




For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth
to strengthen those whose hearts
are fully committed to Him.
- 2 Chronicles 16:9




But on this one will I look:

On him who is poor and of a contrite spirit,

And who trembles at My word.

- Isaiah 66:4

At its best our age is an age of searchers and discoverers,
and at its worst, an age that has domesticated despair
and learned to live with it happily.
- Flannery O'Connor 

We celebrated my 60th birthday on the last week of March. My official birthday pictures were ready a week after, but since I had already left for Manila by the first of April and did not return home until six weeks later, I got to view the pictures of the memorable event only a few days ago.

I have chosen a few photos to go with this post, which is about the special birthday celebration I had for my 60th year. 

I have entitled it Abiding: The Anatomy of a Birthday.

The Accurate and Reliable Dictionary (a free English-English online dictionary) defines "anatomy" as: "The art of dissecting, or artificially separating the different parts of any organized body, to discover their situation, structure, and economy."

A birthday is a life-affirming event, especially when it is remembered and celebrated. The celebration does not have to be grand or spectacular - even just a simple home-cooked dinner eaten quietly, alone or with loved ones, is enough.


What I want to celebrate each time my birthday comes around is only this one truth:

that My heavenly Father thought I was important enough to be created, for an eternal purpose and reason, and that there are valuable gifts and qualities He deposited in me to make me His vessel and instrument by which these purposes can be accomplished...

Therefore, I am neither an afterthought nor an accident; my existence in this space and time is not a mere coincidence or a product of chance.

Many years ago, I was on God's planning table. He thought of every part of me, and put all the intricate parts of my personality together to come up with a unique creation. In this world there will never be anyone like me.

And while my mind, will, and emotions were being formed and shaped by the circumstances of my life, He was watching over me to make sure no one harmed or destroyed His original plans for me. At the right time He revealed Himself to me, caused my heart to hunger and thirst for Him - my true Maker and Creator God, and led me to turn to Him as my Redeemer, Lord, and King.

My birthday celebration is not about me; it is the celebration of a wise God who saw fit to bring me into this world that I may give pleasure and delight to His heart by my obedient responses.

Time and again, God has revealed Himself to me as a covenant God. He is a God of relationship - and as such, He is looking for every opportunity to bring this relationship to the next level.

A relationship that doesn't move up higher is a useless relationship. What is a relationship good for if it isn't growing? God doesn't want His relationship with His children to be stagnant like a murky pool of water. He wants it to be vibrant, life-giving... full of exciting possibilities and promise.

That is what I want to celebrate each time my birthday comes around: my life is in the hands of a covenant-keeping God.

But...I want to affirm this truth not only when I celebrate the day I was born; I want to celebrate this truth every single day of my life!

I believe that the events of my life are well-coordinated and synchronized. Like pieces of a huge masterpiece, each event is just a part of a beautiful eternal picture. Not a teardrop will be wasted.

However, there is one major requirement for this: my destiny begins to be activated the moment I turn my life over to the One who holds the pen in His hands, writing my life story.

A life of peace and joy is what my God has planned for you and for me, but the road is never smooth. There is pain, there is sorrow, mixed in with the joy and the laughter. All are meant to build my inner character, to chisel off the rough edges, for until I enter heaven's gates, I am a diamond in the rough.

There are defeats, failures, and detours... necessary ingredients for growth, but they are all temporary setbacks.

For there are victories as well, and these serve to encourage me to not give up, but to keep moving on.

Obedience then is the only fitting response to a covenant God.

My covenant God leads me one small step at a time.

We may have been raised under varying religious beliefs and cultural traditions. But at the crucial time and place, Creator God reveals Himself and offers us a choice to know Him as the One True God.

He invites us to give a covenant response to His invitation... never by force or manipulation. Always by invitation.

We all know about the deceiver and the accuser, the enemy hiding behind the trees. This enemy whispers lies and half truths. He twists the events of our lives to give us a wrong perspective, to embitter us, to make us afraid, or, to make us proud and self-sufficient. 

But the Father says, "No... no... I am not like that My child. This is who I really am. This is what is on My heart for you. Don't listen to the enemy's lies, he has blinded your eyes."

The Father says, "You will find Me if you seek Me with all your heart."

Indeed, truth is revealed in stages... and also only to the one who truly seeks and hungers.

Heaven will be filled with men and women who will rejoice forever in the way God has written their life stories. It will take eternity for us to listen to all these stories.

As Bill Johnson says so beautifully, "Our defeats are temporary, but our victories are permanent."

Heaven will be a beautiful place of finding out the complete and unabridged version of our redemption stories... the incredible truth of how God turned our defeats into victories, our sorrows into songs of joy.

This is what I celebrate on my 60th birthday.

That is why I invited friends and loved ones who would gladly celebrate with me... it is an event to rejoice in God my Maker, the Scriptwriter of my Life Story.

On my 60th birthday, I also celebrate my dear parents. My parents were humble and hardworking. They brought me up in simplicity, taught me the value of hard work. But they also instilled in my heart a love for the arts, the finer side of life, developing my intellect, filling my heart with music, beauty, elegance.

Truly I am proud of my upbringing. I will never forget Mama's singing and laughter. I will never forget Papa's quiet but cheerful ways. He had such a generous giving heart. Their lives have impacted me for eternity.

Papa and Mama on their wedding day

July 9, 1952

On my 60th birthday I celebrate my only sister. We grew up together. Our lives have been intertwined ever since she was conceived. My sister was definitely given to me as a gift from God. I will never overlook this truth.

A family photo taken on their 9th Wedding Anniversary

July 9, 1961

(I was 8 years old in this picture)

We have been separated not only by physical distance but also by the different roads we have taken. I will not deny there have been years when there had been misunderstanding and pain. But I know my sister's heart. She only wants the best for me - and that will never change. She has always tried to understand me, and I understand her, too. In the end healing and forgiveness have come. I always remember Papa's words, words of so much wisdom: "Blood is thicker than water." The future is bright and beautiful for my dear sister and me. 

My younger sister and me

Christmas 1956
(I was almost 4 years old in this picture, my sister was 2)

On my 60th birthday, my only sister traveled a long way to be with me in my celebration. It meant so much... oh, so much to me. It will not be repeated, this milestone event of my life... my 60th birthday. And she came all the way from America to be with me. In many ways, this was such an affirmation of her love for me. I am a woman of few words... but it has meant so much to me, and I will treasure it forever.

a hug from my sister after she spoke words of blessing for me

My younger sister and me
On my 60th birthday celebration
March 27, 2013

My sister met God-given and my two grandchildren for the first time. 

A beautiful family picture - my sister with me and my family.

On my 60th birthday, I celebrated my extended family of origin, represented by my first cousins Kuya B and Ate G, who came to Bacolod City all the way from their home city located in southern Philippines. 

I cannot thank them enough for having graced my birthday with their presence. They were not really aware of the symbolism of their being there. 

Kuya B is the son of my father's sister, Cornelia. The rest of my cousins on the father side are all in North America with their respective families. But he and his wife stood not only for my father's family, but also for my mother's family - many cousins in Manila whom I could not all invite to come. I rejoice in the family that nurtured me; yes, these cousins of mine were all an important part of my upbringing. Again, it means so much that they came all the way to be with me on this once in a lifetime event. It will never come around again, but they made it more special by deciding to come.

On my 60th birthday, I celebrated my husband, Ernie. He is no longer physically present, but his contribution to my life can never be overlooked. He is God's gift to me. Together, we have built a family for generations to come. 

Along the same lines, on my 60th birthday, I celebrated my family: my two sons First Born and Worshiper, my daughter Obedient One, my daughters in love God-given and Chosen One, my two grandsons Forerunner and Full of Hope/Mighty Warrior.

My family is my pride and joy. My children have been such a blessing to me. They have been obedient and God-fearing. 

I believe in the best for all of them. 

My sons have chosen good and Godly wives... the wives I have prayed for them ever since they were little boys...

... just as I am believing that God has already hand-picked a Godly man for my daughter.

On my 60th birthday, I also celebrated my husband's family. How I wished all of them could have been there - but there were previous plans that could not be cancelled. So Ernie's dear sister Suzette and her family could not be with us. Ernie's brother Voltaire and his wife Faith live in America, so they also could not be with us. But both Sue and Faith made it a point to call me and greet me on my special day.

For that gesture of love alone I am truly grateful. Nevertheless, they also both gave me expensive tokens as birthday gifts - lovely reminders that I am precious to them.

I also appreciate the fact that Sue's youngest son, Tony and his girlfriend Carmen, came to the celebration.

Tony was 4 years old when he walked down the aisle to be part of my bridal entourage as our ring bearer. Again, this is symbolic for me - on that special night, Tony represented my husband's side of the family.

My friends are an important part of my life story.

On my 60th birthday I celebrated my God-given friends... both the friends I have chosen to keep, as well as those who have chosen to keep me in their hearts.

It is impossible to name them all, but a few of them need to be mentioned here.

My best friend Melanie was very much a part of this birthday celebration. We live far from each other, but the distance is only in physical terms. A package bearing her gifts for me arrived a few weeks before my birthday, and among them was this special Psalm 139:14 necklace.

I wore it that night, and indeed, she was close to my heart on my 60th birthday.

Among my special friends are Max and Grace Hughes... a couple very dear to Ernie and me. They have seen our children grow up... they have loved us in a very special way. Max gave the prayer for the generations during the blessing ceremony, and I could not help but shed a few tears while he was praying. Max and Ernie were special friends, and Grace was like a big sister to me. I thank God for them.

Then, my women friends at our church, the Women of Purpose who have come to have a very special place in my heart. We have met every week for lunch together and a devotional time after, and our hearts have become knit and blended in God's love.

Each one of these women have a special story to tell, God's grace in our lives have enabled us and empowered us to overcome. I truly love each and every one of them.

Menchu spoke special words of blessing for me as a friend. She spoke words from her heart.

Arlene did my make up, Mae Ann fixed my hair... they gifted me with the lovely floral arrangements. Indeed they have made my special night so meaningful just by being there for me. 

The years I have spent with the Christian Academy of Bacolod are among the happiest and most memorable of my life. Many of my former colleagues and ministry staff were present that evening. My dear CAB friends, you will always be a beautiful part of my life.

My church family, needless to say, is a valuable part of my life.

My pastor, Pastor Joe, about to give his pastoral blessing

My intercessor friends - from the Negros Island House of Prayer, and Intercessors for the Philippines... we have prayed together for the prophetic destiny of our nation, and the nation of Israel. The celebration would not have been complete without them.

Mylene, presenting me with her gift 

Butch, the "father" of NIHOP, his wife Mylene, and Ann Cana 

Juan and Helen Coromina

My FFI Family Foundations Phil-Asia family is very close to my heart. God has brought so much healing to our lives, and together, as a ministry team and as close friends, we have endeavored to pass on the healing we have received to many others.

My beloved FFI family

with Aaron from Dubai and Pat from Hawaii

William, National Coordinator of FFI-Philasia, a dear friend...
giving the significance of our family name

my dear friend Pat did a lovely worship dance to the music
Instrument of Peace by the Canadian Brothers

a special thanks to Raffi and Honey Grace, my gracious professional emcees for the blessing ceremony

 charming Ruby, a very special friend

My dear FFI friends in Manila were not able to join in the celebration, but they were definitely also in my heart that night.

One person to whom I want to give special thanks is my dear friend Miriam, who coordinated the birthday event for me. Her expertise and her connections made a lot of difference!

We gave away 60 narra tree seedlings to our guests that night.

It was really symbolic of our family name, Arbolario, which literally means, "a place of many trees."

Its spiritual connotation is, "a restful, shady place."

I want to live up to our name. This is my ongoing prayer for my family, too.

Indeed it was such a meaningful birthday celebration. Not everything can be put into words. But as another month is about to end, I can best sum up the past 60 years of my life in one word.

Abiding.

It is a beautiful word that means to be fully dependent on my life source and provider.

Abide in my love, Jesus says.

The psalmist writes these words:

He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High

Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.

I will say of the Lord, "He is my fortress; 

My God, in Him will I trust."

Jesus also says: He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing.

What strikes me about these words is that I am not the only one abiding... He also abides in me! 

It is a mutual abiding, a beautiful relationship of giving and receiving.

This is another important life lesson I want to share, the fitting covenant response to our covenant God - to abide under the shadow of the Almighty.

I don't want to live a superficial, stagnant relationship with God. Rather, my desire is to have a genuine, authentic, vibrant relationship with Him, one that is continually growing, and bearing fruit. And that is only possible as I abide in Him.

A quote from one of my favorite authors is a fitting ending to this birthday post:

Listen to your life.

See it for the fathomless mystery that it is.

In the boredom and pain of it

no less than in the excitement and gladness,

touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it

because in the last analysis

all moments are key moments

and life itself is grace.

- Frederick Buechner

My Abba Father God, may You be truly honored in my life as I celebrate my first 60 years... and the rest of my life, with You! 

Ernie: A Video Compilation


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Sharing twelve life lessons on my 60th year:

January 2013 - Restoration: A Matter of Perspective

February 2013 - Authenticity: A Matter of Trust

March 2013 - Celebration As a Way of Life

April 2013 - Relinquishment: A Journey of Faith

May 2013 - Abiding: The Anatomy of a Birthday

June 2013 - Exchange: My Weakness for His Strength

July 2013 - Divine Appointments: God's Surprise Visits

August 2013 - Worship: Hidden Riches in Secret Places

September 2013 - Longing for Things Unseen: Escape from Reality

October 2013 - God's Favor: A Season of Replacement

November 2013 - Honor: Creating Space

December 2013 - Sanctuary: Where God Dwells