My Hanukkah and The Changing Faces of Christmas

Mary receives the news from Angel Gabriel 

that the Messiah will be born through her

In the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent from God to a city of Galilee named Nazareth, to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. And the virgin's name was Mary. And he came to her and said, “Greetings, O favored one, the Lord is with you!” But she was greatly troubled at the saying, and tried to discern what sort of greeting this might be. And the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God. And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. And the Lord God will give to him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and of his kingdom there will be no end.”

And Mary said to the angel, “How will this be, since I am a virgin?”

And the angel answered her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; therefore the child to be born will be called holy—the Son of God. And behold, your relative Elizabeth in her old age has also conceived a son, and this is the sixth month with her who was called barren. For nothing will be impossible with God.” And Mary said, “Behold, I am the servant[f] of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.” And the angel departed from her.

- Luke 1:26-38



I grew up loving Christmas.

For me, it became a symbol of family love and togetherness. My early memories of Christmas would be that of me and my sister, little girls of five and six, probably even younger, eagerly waiting for our Papa and Mama to come home on a Saturday afternoon from Cartimar with a freshly cut pine tree from Baguio City. Papa would then put the tree in a small bucket with water, then with Mama's help, steady the tree with rocks and stones, and place it in a corner of our living room. Papa would wrap the pail with green cloth. Christmas music would be played on a turntable, and they would begin to put the Christmas decorations -   balls of different colors and sizes, multicolored lights, stars, tinsel, and all. Then boxes of wrapped gifts would be placed under the tree. The special toys that we could only play with at Christmas time would also be placed there, as part of the decorations. As Christmas drew near, more gifts would appear. What I remember the most is waking up mornings and smelling the distinct smell of the pine tree permeating our home.

Every year it would be the same Christmas season ritual.  In 1965, we had our first Christmas in our new home. I was 12 years old then. Papa and Mama came home one Saturday afternoon with a freshly cut pine tree. The Christmas music was played, and the decors put up. Then in the evening, we sat in our dimly lit living room, admiring the Christmas tree. It was really a family thing. The next morning, I woke up to the familiar scent of the pine tree filled our home.

Christmas reminds me of my growing up years. The voices of children singing carols outside our gate. My sister and me going to our neighbors' houses to give gifts. The love and nurture and care of parents who loved us. The smell of food being prepared by my parents in the kitchen.

Yes, Papa and Mama did most things together. I am not saying that we were a perfect family. There were times of conflict and misunderstanding. But that's what family is all about. The differences got resolved in a quiet and peaceful way. My sister and I received good upbringing. Kind words, loving touches, consideration, compassion. I don't think I have father or mother wounds in my heart. There was no violence. There were no shouting matches. No drunkenness or marital infidelity. Only hard work, simplicity, elegance, and beauty.

Elegance... we had lots of it. The table was always set beautifully. My sister and I had nice clothes to wear. Our home was clean, and neat, and in order. My father was gentle with Mama, and us his children. We were taught good manners at an early age. There was honor and respect.

That is what I remember about Christmas.

And so when I had my own home, I did the same thing my parents did. Ernie and I had our first Christmas tree the year our first-born son was born. And we kept adding to the decors every year. I did not throw away any of the decors we had accumulated through the years. We only added one or two more each year.

Ernie would play his collection of Christmas music - jazz, philharmonic orchestras, choral, vocal solos... he had a wide assortment of music. There would be hot chocolate and cookies on the table, the children would be playing nearby, while Ernie and I put up the decors. It didn't take long because we did not have a big tree.

Then there were the shared meals and the many Christmas parties with friends.There would be a yearly Christmas Cantata, and a Christmas Eve worship service. Barb, our pastor's wife, would bring several trays of cookies she had baked herself. There would be lots of gifts going around. There would be the special dinner with Ernie's extended family.

Throughout the years of my marriage, Christmas came to have an added meaning for me: the love of a husband. Again, just like my earlier years, I did not have husband wounds. Ernie was faithful, hardworking, kind, considerate, and generous with his affection and attention. I couldn't have asked for more.

Of course, I know that the real reason for Christmas is Jesus coming to earth as a man to be our Redeemer. That is the ultimate reason for the season. The main motivation for the celebration.

Then in November 2008 Ernie passed away. Before that happened, I remember he had asked me the usual question he would ask at that time of the year: "When are we going to put up the tree?"

That first Christmas without Ernie, I found it hard to put up the tree. First Born had gotten married earlier that year and was no longer living with us. But I remember that his wife God-given had given me a helping hand. I still played the Christmas music. But I don't think I prepared the hot chocolate and the cookies.

God-given and I put up the tree without much ado. And as I sat down to watch the lights on the tree, there were tears in my years. After all, it had only been a month since Ernie died.

Of course I know that the real reason for Christmas is Jesus coming to earth as a man to be our Redeemer. This is the ultimate reason for the season, the main motivation for the celebration.

But each year after my husband went home to heaven, the Christmas season has become increasingly more simple for me.

It's been a while since I listened to Ernie's collection. I now listen music on my laptop attached to a speaker. I finished putting up the Christmas tree in our living room only two days ago.

It's not that I no longer treasure the memories. I still do. And I will forever be thankful for the kind of nurture and love that I received from my parents and my husband. They are God's precious gifts to me and have truly given shape and substance to the person I am today.

But these past weeks I have felt a huge change in the way I look at  Christmas.

It must have been about ten years ago when I learned that Jesus Christ was not actually born on December 25. Some people I know no longer put up the Christmas tree, because they say that the Christian celebration of Christmas has its origins in midwinter pagan festivals and worship of the sun and the planet Saturn, among other things. In the dead and dreariness of the dark winter season, boughs of greenery were used to decorate homes to remind people of the hope in the coming spring.

In truth, Christmas as I know it today, is very much a cultural and traditional celebration.

I am not about to give up celebrating Christmas altogether. But this year I want to celebrate Christmas in a different way.

Family memories are good. And for the sake of family, we will still have the festive meal, and the Christmas tree, and the giving of gifts.

But in this season, together with the birth of Jesus, I am also choosing to celebrate the feast of Hanukkah.

The story of Hanukkah in its entire historical context is a long one, but it is worth reading it to gain insight and understanding. (link supplied)

The temple in Jerusalem has been desecrated under the tyranny of the Syrian King Antiophus IV, Temple worship had been prohibited, and all the precious articles used for worship had been stolen, including the menorah. A revolt arose in defense of their faith and native land, led by Judah Maccabee. Against all odds, the Syrians were defeated by the Maccabean revolt.

Now the Maccabees returned to Jerusalem to liberate it. They entered the Temple and cleared it of the idols placed there by the Syrian vandals. Judah and his followers built a new altar, which he dedicated on the twenty-fifth of the month of Kislev, in the year 3622 (139 B.C.E.). Since the golden Menorah had been stolen by the Syrians, the Maccabees now made one of cheaper metal. When they wanted to light it, they found only a small cruse of pure olive oil bearing the seal of the High Priest Yochanan. It was sufficient to light only for one day. By a miracle of G‑d, it continued to burn for eight days, till new oil was made available. That miracle proved that G‑d had again taken His people under His protection. In memory of this, our sages appointed these eight days for annual thanksgiving and for lighting candles. (from The Story of Chanukah)

This miraculous event is remembered yearly during the Hebrew month of Kislev, which corresponds to the month of December on our Gregorian calendar. It is called Hanukkah, but also referred to as the Feast of Dedication, or Festival of Lights.

image source

It is almost certain the Jesus Christ was conceived in the womb of Mary during the feast of Hanukkah. That would place the birth of our Lord in the month of September to October, during the Feast of Tabernacles, or Sukkot.

The symbolism of these dates is awesome. Really, the realization of it just grips my heart.

Jesus being born during the Feast of Tabernacles brings home the truth that Jesus, is God With Us, Emmanuel. He tabernacled with us. This means, He came down to earth in an earthly, temporary dwelling of a human body...

Tradition says that He was born in a manger, others say that Jesus was actually born in a sukkot, one of the temporary booths that Jews at that time built to celebrate the Feast of Tabernacles.

And now, Hanukkah.

It was during Hanukkah that the good news about the birth of Jesus was given to a girl in her teens... The heavenly Father was borrowing her womb so His Son could be born as a man. She was already betrothed to Joseph, so the implication of her becoming pregnant before the official wedding ceremony will surely be a great scandal to her and her family. No one would believe her if she said that the baby was the Son of God, and that the pregnancy was caused by a supernatural act of the Holy Spirit. Even in this day and age, it would be quite unbelievable.

And yet, she was willing. And she was obedient.

I remember that beautiful passage:

If you are willing and obedient, you shall eat the good of the land...

- Isaiah 1:19

Hanukkah is all about willingness and obedience.

During Hanukkah, the focus is on the miraculous supply of oil that kept the candles burning for eight days.

Eight is the number that stands for new beginnings.

Hanukkah is a feast commemorating the miraculous supply of oil. The oil that did not run out for eight days, when there was just enough oil for the lights on the altar to burn for only one day...

Hanukkah speaks about the anointing of cleansing, for re-dedication, for rebuilding, for breakthrough.

Hanukkah is the feast that reminds us that Jesus came to earth as a human embryo at this time. And so, Hanukkah speaks about humility, and obedience... the obedience and humility of Jesus...

... who, though he was in the form of God, 
did not count equality with God

a thing to be grasped, 
but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant,

being born in the likeness of men. 
And being found in human form,

he humbled himself by becoming obedient

to the point of death, even death on a cross.

- Philippians 2:5-8

Hanukkah also speaks about the humility and obedience of Mary, the beautiful heart of Mary who called herself the Lord's maidservant, and was willing to let these things be done unto me according to Thy word, and became the mother who pondered and treasured things in her heart when they were too awesome for her to comprehend.

Hanukkah speaks of faith, to trust that the Father knows best, when the way is dark.

As December comes to an end, I name this month, and this year 2016, Miraculous Provision.

Yes, I am so thankful that God has made me the recipient of His miraculous provision.

Today my heart is ready for Hanukkah.

Starting tonight, and for the next seven days, I will light the Hanukkah candles, and remember the true meaning of this season for me.

Getting ready to light the candles for Hanukkah Day 1
at sundown tonight.

Generosity: A Sanctuary of Beauty

Purple Flowers

by Rose Ann Hayes

(quote from Jeff Goins added)

image source

For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.

- Proverbs 23:7

A generous person will prosper;

whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.

-Proverbs 11:25

I write because I don't know what I think until I read what I say.  

-Flannery O'Connor

It's been over a month since I last posted an entry on this blog. Tonight I'm grateful for the opportunity to write another chapter to my life story. I've entitled it Generosity, the name I am giving the month of November as it comes to an end.

Looking back over the past weeks, I see the recurring pattern of generosity in the fabric of my life. Yet, woven between the threads are occasional strands of relational pain. For those contrasting strands, I choose to be thankful for they add texture to my existence. They prompt me to evaluate my relationships, and to make necessary adjustments. Forced out of my comfort zone, I can honestly assess the condition of my heart, check the filters through which I view my life, and listen to what God is saying.

A month ago I was given an opportunity to be part of another kingdom assignment. The past months I had been on many plane rides and airport layovers en route to and returning from ministry destinations. Thus my initial response was one of reluctance and hesitation. I asked, Am I really needed on this trip, Lord? 

Through my ministry leaders I received confirmation that I was indeed a vital part of this mission, and peace came. I realized that it was an invitation to join the Father in what He is doing. And when God extends a special invitation to join Him in His work, only a fool would say no.

Plans were not fully laid out right away, but in my heart was a quiet sense of trusting Abba Father for how things will work out. I was truly grateful to help fulfill a kingdom purpose in the lives God would entrust to us. 

Breakfast, October 24, 2016

"Heart Wide Open"

The Greek word patior comes to mind. That it should surface at the exact moment I needed it amazes me. One of the definitions of patior is "to allow" or "to submit." It also means "to undergo." It includes the sense of allowing other people to do things to you, in contrast to you deciding to do it yourself. 

In another sense, the word patior means "to be handed over."

I first heard about this beautiful word years ago, from a book by Henri Nouwen. Henri wrote that in the first three years of the public ministry of Jesus, He was a man of action. He taught, healed the sick, and went about His Father's business. But at the end of His life, He allowed things to be done to Him. He was fully God, yet He underwent Gethsemane as fully man, where He grappled with the reality of the Cross. 

In the end, He said yes to the Father.

Jesus ended His life in a state of being actively passive. The words passive and patience are derived from the Greek patior.

It is with this sense of being actively passive that I embarked on that assignment. I didn't know what lies ahead, but one thing was sure: destiny was unfolding before me, and my heart was ready. I could be relaxed about it, mostly because I was trusting God for the outcome.

Everything did fall into place in the end. Plans were made, not in the usual way that corporate plans are drawn and finalized, but in consideration of people's availability and time commitments. Flexibility was the name of the game, so to speak. And so the plans we came up with were rather open-ended. But it all worked out beautifully. People were willing to make sacrifices; there was commitment and cooperation.

I am quite passionate about what I do, but not in the sense of being intense or driven. I like the way Nouwen describes the word passion. He says passion is a kind of waiting - waiting for what other people are going to do. All action ends in passion because the response to our action is out of our hands.

At this point in my life, the passion with which I do the work I have been called to do is flowing out of a heart that rests and trusts in what God will do.

Looking at the time I spent in ministry, I can say that it was done with this sense of quiet passion.

Then something came up that really shook my world. 

I  write about it here because there are precious lessons to be gleaned, but mostly to verbalize the journey my heart took in response to what happened. 

I echo what Flannery O'Connors says: I write because I don't know what I think until I read what I say.

Writing my thoughts down helps bring clarity.

Someday I will look back at these days and understand the purpose for this important chapter in my life. Probably the greatest lesson I am taking away at the present moment is this: What was intended by the enemy to wound became a redemptive tool in the Father's hand to open the eyes of my heart.

It has been a long time since my world was shaken in that way. 

It was a case of the topical versus the relational level of communication, something that the enemy is good at messing up with.

On the topical level, my motives were pure, and my conscience was clear. But somewhere along the way, a lie was planted by the enemy, seeking to sow discord. The real motive for something I did was misunderstood, and out of that misunderstanding, wrong relational messages were exchanged.

I thought I was quite secure in my inner worth and true value. Yet, the enemy was subtle in his attack; my self-worth was shaken even in the midst of spiritual breakthroughs. 

But thanks to the grace of God He enabled me to carry on and attend to the needs of the moment.

I must be honest, though, and admit that I felt misunderstood, and misrepresented. Every part of me wanted to explain my side. But rather than defend myself, I tried to view things from the other person's point of view, bearing in mind one important lesson about relational conflicts, that one does not have to be wrong to repent. 

The way things turned out was not entirely my fault, nevertheless, I knew the mature response was to own my part in what happened, without passing any negative judgment. 

Where there has been relational miscommunication, one can help promote healing by taking a humble stance and asking for forgiveness for the wrong relational message that was conveyed.

I asked for forgiveness.

And I chose to release forgiveness.

I say this not to make myself look good.  Indeed it is so easy to give in to self-pity, and self-focus... when in truth, the Father is just waiting to point the way to a healing breakthrough.

So I asked God to help me walk in the opposite spirit. Having been a recipient of so much generosity throughout the past weeks, I didn't want to give room to offense. 

Instead, I wanted to give a wide place for honor, even though my own heart was still in pain.

On the plane ride back to the Philippines, there was a chunk of time to be alone with my thoughts, and I sensed the Father slowly begin downloading His healing into my own heart.

I realized that despite the full schedule of the past weeks, with ministry extending past midnight on most days, I did not feel tired or drained. On the contrary, I felt energized and revived.

I looked back at the sweetness of my relationship with my dear friends. We have all poured much investment into each other's lives, an investment that should not be put to waste.

When trust is broken, it is easy to give up and walk away.

Old wounds can sometimes re-open.

I realize that just as I have my own filters from which I view my life events, other people also have their own filters.

We all have our own areas of blindness.

And we all have unhealed wounds... triggers that connect to past wounding experiences... the subtle role of the enemy who is quick to whisper lies into our ears... 

Really, just about anything could go wrong as we journey through life.

That's understandable, since we are in a war. The enemy fights dirty. His goal is always to steal, to kill, and to destroy.

But Jesus came to give life, and give it abundantly.

I want to be a life-giver in my relationships. My mind is filled with accumulated spiritual knowledge. Of what use is that when they are not put to practice? Of what value are the words I speak to teach others, if I cannot walk my talk?

Why not choose to turn the other cheek, and walk the extra mile... in the opposite spirit? Why not choose to bless, even when my own heart is in need of healing? 

The Bible says that as far as it depends on me, to live at peace with everyone. (Romans 12:18) What better time to put that into practice than at this time? After all, we are in varying stages of maturity and growth.

The heart response I offer at this time could very well be the very response others have given me, without my knowing it. 

Slowly I picked up the pieces of my heart and allowed the Father to put them back together.  After all, He is the one who assigns my true worth.

I have chosen to remain quiet, no longer seeing a need to protect my position. Abba Father reminded me that as a lamb before its shearers is dumb, so Jesus opened not His mouth before His accusers.

Could I truly be like Jesus, without sounding self-righteous?

With His grace and help, I am walking in that direction. I can now look back at what happened without blameshifting or fault-finding. 

Yet, there are also practical steps to take.

There has been forgiveness, but the process of forgiving takes time, even as Jesus said that we may need to do it seventy times seven (Matthew 18:21-22). 

I'm doing the math. And applying it.

And I hear my heart speaking. In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. (Hebrews 12:4).

That just puts everything in perspective. Everything that we consider an injustice in our life pales in comparison with what was done to Jesus on the Cross.

Understandably, hearts are still bruised where the lies of the enemy were aimed like arrows. 

Since the only weapon against falsehood is truth, in this season, I am embracing Jesus Christ as the Way, the Truth, and the Life.

Jesus Christ as Truth brings cleansing, clarity, and freedom to my heart.

Jesus is also the Prince of Peace, giving me His Peace in the midst of my troubled waters.

It is a new season for me.

A season of giving honor a chance to do its work.

This is the season to step back, and to allow space and time for healing and restoration to take place, and for broken trust to be rebuilt.

From the same position of active passivity that I have been living my life this year, I continue to look at my relationships. 

I want to live life with a passion. 

Yet, not a passion of too much action, of trying to fix things, of getting issues resolved, of being in control over my circumstances, of making things happen... but passion in the sense of passionate waiting. Waiting for what God will do.

Abba Father reminds me that the battle is His, I only have to be still.

Maybe others will look at it as complacency. Or spiritualizing conflict, and pushing my real feelings under the rug.

For me, it is really the patior of undergoing, of submitting, and of giving permission.

It is keeping my heart open to the glorious possibilities that God has in store for those who wait. 

I hope there will come a time when I will be able to speak the truth in love. But even if it doesn't happen, my heart is on the road to peace. 

Meanwhile, I am thankful for the many opportunities for soul recharge that have been made available to me since I got back three weeks ago. As a friend from England said, I need to have a strong soul to carry me through the pain of this season. How soothing that advice was when I received it. My spirit is being fed with worship and close communion with God... but the soul also needs to be nourished.. with beauty... joy... laughter... and meaningful friendship.

How grateful I am for the generosity of the different people I have been with the past month. A dear friend from Manila wrote me an affirming letter; just what I needed at this time. An online British friend watered my soul with prophetic words from the Father's heart.  A Bible study leader, a dear friend as well, reminded me that the Lord is my Husband, my Protector, my Defender, my Shield and my sure Reward.

My Father God has been generous with His words, imparting to me my true identity. You are a faithful daughter, and I take delight in you. These were the words Abba Father spoke to me over and over again.

But the greatest generosity of all is the full payment that Jesus gave on the Cross for all the wrong things that people may do to me in this lifetime.

Yes, the Cross gives me an eternal perspective from which to view the events of the past weeks.

I am entering a season of rediscovering who I am. 

Of stepping back, evaluating, assessing, taking stock.

Of spending quality and quantity time in the Father's presence. Asking Him to reveal my heart, and His heart, to me.

Of asking God to show me where He is leading me, and what my next assignment is to be.

Of new kingdom strategies.

I sense that He is taking me out of this comfort zone, and leading me to new, uncharted territories and deeper waters.

No matter what the future holds, in this season, I want to offer  my heart as a sanctuary of beauty to an ugly world.

That quote by Jeff Goins sinks deep.

That is the kind of heart I want to have... in everything I do, and say.

And so, as November comes to an end in a few days, I am grateful for the generosity that has been given me.

I want to pay forward... and be generous, in return.

Generous in my intercession.

Generous in my praise and worship.

Generous in my faith, and in my hope.

Generous in my love.

Generous in my time, resources, and efforts.

Generous in my opinions and attitudes.

Generous in the way I view others.

Generous in my perspective of my life events.

To not withhold good when it is in my power to give it, but at the same time to be able to choose wisely.

I will choose my battles.

I will choose the thoughts that I entertain.

I will choose my words carefully.

I will choose the people I allow to speak into my life.

All these... because in everything I think, say and do, God desires that He alone be given the glory and the honor. May my love for Him be given precedence and top consideration in all the decisions I make.   

I shall ask into my shell only those friends 

with whom I can be completely honest.

- Anne Morrow Lindbergh

(Gift from the Sea)

  

Finding Grace in Brokenness

Good Soil

Behold, A Sower Went Forth to Sow

And when a great crowd was gathering and people from town after town came to Him, He said in a parable,"A sower went out to sow his seed. And as he sowed, some fell along the path was trampled underfoot, and the birds of the air devoured it. And some fell on the rock, and as it grew up, it withered away, because it had no moisture. And some fell among thorns, and the thorns grew up with it and choked it. And some fell into good soil and grew and yielded a hundredfold." As He said these things, He called out, "He who has ears to hear, let Him hear." Luke 8:4-8

Our Thai Airways flight from Phnom Penh landed in Bangkok Suvarnabhumi International Airport at 11 p.m. but our flight to Manila was not until 7 a.m. the following day. David, Tina, and I looked for lounging chairs where we could comfortably spend the night, but we didn't find any. Finally, after hours of trying to get some sleep, David found the Thai Airways lounging area, but by then, it was only two hours before our flight!

We arrived in Manila shortly before noon. I was really happy to find my daughter Obedient One working from home that day. After a late lunch, I was able to get some much needed rest. 

I was also grateful for some down time in our Manila home before returning to Bacolod City. The "in-between" time in the middle of two destinations afforded me much opportunity to catch up on my Bible reading, and spending huge chunks of unhurried time with the Lord.

I was scheduled to return to Bacolod on Sunday evening, so Obedient One and I were still able to go to church that morning. The Sunday message at Victory Katipunan given by Pastor Sky Ramos on the parable of the sower was a much needed reminder for me.

Although I have read this parable many times before, it touched my heart in a fresh, new way that morning.

I drank in as much as I could of what the Spirit was saying. And I was just so refreshed.

This parable is actually a breakthrough parable because Jesus explains its meaning for His disciples word for word. There is just no way that we could miss out on what it means.

The story is about the kingdom of God operating in the hearts of people. 

Just how important is the Word of God to you and me?

Father God is constantly sowing seed, speaking words of life, but the crucial question is, Is anybody listening?

Abba Father is constantly speaking, sowing His word, seeking to build up our faith.

There are really only two kinds of response to God's word: to obey or not to obey.

A response of obedience strengthens our faith, and softens the ground of our hearts.

A response of disobedience weakens our faith, and hardens the ground of our hearts.

Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.

God's word is living and active, sharper than a double edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and spirit, of joints and marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. (Hebrews 4:12)

How awesome is that?

A daily intake of God's word helps me divide between a soulish and a spiritual response, and helps bring to light the thoughts and intentions of our hearts.

Again, how marvelous is that?

Just how important is God's word to us?

The spoken word of God has tremendous value. Joshua, as he was preparing to lead the Israelites into the Promised Land, heard God speak these words to Him:

This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success. - Joshua 1:8

This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth.

It really is not enough to read God's word. It has to be regularly spoken. We are to meditate on it day and night, until its creative, life giving juices become a part of our body, soul, and spirit.

How much of the word do we devour, ingest, digest, meditate on... day after day? How much of God's word gets chewed on, and becomes our daily nourishment?

Do we create space for God to sow the seeds of His word in our hearts?

A parallel passage of this parable, says that other seeds fell on good soil and produced grain, some a hundredfold, some sixty, some thirty. (Matthew 13:8)

If God can give us a hundredfold return on one seed sown on good ground, why will I settle for a mere thirtyfold return?

What determines the amount of yield that one single seed produces?

I believe it is the willingness to make God's word an integral part of our daily lives.

I want my heart to be a fertile ground for God's word to grow in. I want my heart to be a hearing heart that joyfully receives the word of God and responds in obedience to it.

After lunch I said goodbye to Obedient One, so grateful for the five days that I was able to spend with her.

And I returned to Bacolod City with my heart full of fresh truth from God's word.

Four days after I arrived in Bacolod, it was time to board another flight for another ministry assignment. David, Tata and I went back to Cagayan de Oro City to conduct an Ancient Paths seminar again.

It really was such a blessed time of ministering God's truth to the 21 people who attended the seminar and received ministry in the small groups after each teaching session.

On Sunday, the day we were to return to Bacolod, all flights were cancelled due to a tropical cyclone. Our flights were rebooked for the following day.

Because of this cancellation, we were able to attend the worship service at the First Assembly of God church, the church to which our hosts belong.

I believe that it was a divine appointment for us to be in church that morning. Towards the end of the service, a young man named Lloyd spoke a word of exhortation to the congregation. as I listened to him speak, there was a deep stirring in my spirit. His passion for God's kingdom was evident in his voice, on his face, and in the words he spoke.

Then he looked straight at me and gave a brief testimony of how he came to know the Lord. It was eleven years ago when I attended my first Ancient Paths seminar, he said. I will never forget the date, it was in September 2005 that I came to know the Lord Jesus Christ through that seminar, and I gave my life over to Him, and I received Him into my heart as my Lord and Savior.

I couldn't hold back the tears. Lloyd was teary eyed as well.

This young man is now the assistant pastor in this church.

His life is the very example of a hearing heart, a heart with fertile soil, on which the word of God was sown eleven years ago... and I have no doubt that over a hundredfold of fruit has already been produced in his life.

I was humbled... and really wanted to remain silent for the remainder of the day.

What an awesome privilege I have been given, to receive encouragement that no work we do for the kingdom is ever in vain.

God is always speaking, God is always sowing, looking for fertile hearts on which the seed of His word will be planted, and bear fruit, a hundredfold.

Yes, it is indeed a privilege that has refreshed my heart anew.

a photo after the worship service with Lloyd

We arrived back in Bacolod City four days ago. Today, in just a few hours, David, Tata and I will once again board our flight to another country.

Once again, we have said "yes" to a kingdom assignment.

What an honor, what a privilege to be ambassadors of peace, life, and healing, for the King of Kings, and the Lord of Lords.

I realize that this is what is required of me in this season. I no longer consider it a ministry, I think of it as my life.

Speak Lord, for Your daughter is listening.

Times and Seasons

Keep your heart with all vigilance,

for from it flow the springs of life.

-Proverbs 4:23

... of Issachar,

men who had understanding of the times,

to know what Israel ought to do...

- 1 Chronicles 12:32

Today my third grandson Joyful One turns two years old.

I arrived in Manila from Cambodia five days ago, and I won't be back in Bacolod in time to celebrate his birthday with our family. But on my heart is a blessing for this little one as he enters another year.

I bless my grandson with the strategic Issachar anointing.

The sons of Issachar were among the men who came to David while he was still a fugitive from Saul. David had been anointed as the next king, and Saul's days in the kingdom were numbered. David was in a season of preparation, learning humble submission to a king whose anointing had run dry, a king who insisted on staying in power when he knew he was running on empty and had lost his spiritual and moral ascendancy to rule.

The men who came to show support and allegiance to David were not being traitors, they were heeding a higher calling of showing loyalty to a man who was clearly anointed to be the next ruler. These men were described in 1 Chronicles 12 as mighty men, helpers in the war, men of valor. 

These men were equipped for war. and they came to David at Hebron to turn over the kingdom of Saul to him, according to the word of the LORD.

As we read in these passages (1 Chronicles 12), these men of war were arrayed in battle order, and had come to Hebron with a whole heart to make David king over Israel. They were of a single mind to make David king.

What impresses me about the twelve tribes of Israel (named after the twelve sons of Jacob) is that each one of them had a "warring gift." Each tribe was needed in the battle for the special gift or anointing for war that they were gifted in.

The sons of Issachar operated in the strategy anointing. They understood the times and they knew what Israel ought to do.

When Jacob blessed his son Issachar, this was what he said:

Issachar is a strong donkey,

crouching between the sheepfolds.

He saw that a resting place was good,

and that the land was pleasant,

so he bowed his shoulder to bear,

and became a servant at forced labor.
- Genesis 49: 14-15

This blessing ascribes not only strength to this tribe. It ascribes discernment, as well as a willingness to bear burdens, and to work hard, even to offer one's services for hire.

The word Issachar literally means "recompense, or hire."

The tribe of Issachar received as their inheritance the rich farmlands of the Valley of Jezreel in Galilee.

My blessing for my grandson:

I bless you today dearest one, with the anointing of Issachar. It is an anointing for discernment, for understanding the times and the seasons of the Lord, and with than discernment, a wisdom for knowing what to do.

I bless you with physical strength, a quality that is needed for the days ahead of us. 

I bless you with a keen sense for business, knowing that a land is good, and pleasant, and the willingness to work hard to acquire it.

I bless you with the obedience to bear spiritual burdens that the LORD may someday place upon your shoulders, and the obedience to lift these burdens up to God, asking Him for wisdom and discernment to do what He requires.

These are heavy things for a young boy to carry for now, but I bless you with a heart that is being prepared to walk and operate in this anointing.

You will be a blessing to our family, for to each member has been assigned a specific gift needed to wage war against the enemy. And I declare that you will put that gift to good use when the time comes.

I declare that your heart is being prepared even now for an important and crucial kingdom assignment.

May your heart be ready to obey, humble and submissive to the assignment that God has for you.

With much love always

Nana

Willing and Obedient

Lotus flower

photo taken at the Royal University of Phnom Penh

Phnom Penh, Cambodia

September 30, 2016





"...If you are willing and obedient,
You shall eat the good of the land;
But if you refuse and rebel,
You shall be devoured by the sword";
For the mouth of the LORD has spoken.
- Isaiah 1:19, 20




But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness,
and all these things shall be added to you.
- Matthew 6:33

What an amazing, remarkable month September has been!

By 11 o'clock a.m. of Saturday, the 17th of September, David, Tina, and I had checked in for our 1 p.m. Thai Airways flight to Bangkok, but all three of us had actually awakened before dawn just to make sure we got to the airport on time.

Upon reaching Suvarnabhumi Airport in Bangkok, we literally walked several kilometers to reach our boarding gate for the flight to Phnom Penh. I have never been as thankful for travelators (moving floors) as I was that day!

We waited another hour or so at our boarding before we could finally board our plane.

After nearly a day of travel, we finally arrived in Phnom Penh at 7 o'clock in the evening. Our hosts were outside the baggage claim to meet us. We each had a bowl of hot pho at a nearby Vietnamese restaurant, but by then, travel-weary as we were, all we really wanted was a good night's rest! We were so grateful when we reached their cozy home and finally settled in our bedrooms.

I woke up early the next morning refreshed and ready for the kingdom assignment.

The "assignment" came in the form of an invitation from Pastor "Famous Soldier" whose ministry is based on Phnom Penh, to conduct a two-week School of Ministry-Facilitator Training for fifteen of them who wanted to be trained to minister in the context of an Ancient Paths seminar.

A year ago, Pastor Famous Soldier and his wife God is Gracious were in Bacolod City for vacation. On their last weekend in the city, they were invited to attend an Ancient Paths seminar. This was not part of their original plan, but they decided to say yes to the invitation. Unknown to them, this seminar was part of God's plan to put them on the pathway of blessing that God had prepared for them long before they were born.

The healing from emotional wounds that they received at the seminar changed the course of their lives. A desire to bring this seminar to their church in Phnom Penh burned in their hearts.

In January this year, they requested our office for a team to conduct An Ancient Paths seminar in their church, a request that became a reality in May of this year.

Their request was actually an invitation for all of us to partner with God's kingdom purpose for our lives. All of us just needed to understand that it is God who plants the desire in our hearts to join Him in what He is doing.

In May, four of us from Family Foundations International-Philasia (FFI-Philippines), namely Raffi, David, Tata, and I, traveled to Phnom Penh to do a preliminary School of Ministry with Famous Soldier and his wife, and an Ancient Paths seminar for 18 members of their church.

In July, two months after we got back from Cambodia, we received another request to conduct a ministry training for fifteen of them who were willing to be a part of this kingdom work in this part of the world.

It was again another invitation to join God in what He was doing.

In September, three of us from the Philippines, David, Tina, and myself, traveled to Cambodia to do an FFI School of Ministry for their church.

There is a main plot, and several sub-plots, in this chapter of my life story. There are many other things that are not yet revealed to me at this point.

All I can say is that the invitation to join the Father in what He is doing is the main plot.

When I turned my life over to the Lordship of Jesus Christ 43 years ago, when I was just a twenty year old third year university student, I really had no idea what my life would be like forty years later.

The promise is eternal life. But the details of how that works out in my daily life here on earth are not all given.

God's plan is revealed one step at a time; there is actually just enough light for the next step.

It is up to me to say yes.

The year 2016 started off with me going on an emotional roller coaster ride.

Trusting, yet not fully trusting.

Believing, yet not fully believing.

One foot in the water, the other still firmly planted on the shore.

I was in a crisis of belief. 

Henry Blackaby teaches about this in his Bible study workbook Experiencing God, one book that literally turned my life around.

Mr. Blackaby writes:

When God invites you to join Him in His word, He has a God-sized assignment for you. You will quickly realize you cannot do what He is asking on your own. If God doesn't help you, you will fail. This is the crisis of belief when you  must decide whether to believe God for what He wants to do through you... At this point many people decide not to follow what they sense God is leading them to do. Then they wonder why they do not experience God's presence and activity the way other Christians do... The way you respond at this turning point will determine whether you become involved with God in something God-sized that only He can do for you or whether you will continue to go your own way and miss what He has purposed for your life. (from Terry Covey's blog, Seeds of Faith)

Each of us will go through a crisis of belief several times in our lifetime.

For me, I realize that each new crisis of belief requires another adjustment in the way I respond. There are well-laid out plans that miscarry, close friends and beloved family members that disappoint us, financial reversals, health issues, and of course, death.

Each crisis I face asks me the question, will I trust God, or will I trust myself?

It is easy to trust God intellectually. And of course, that never works.

In this season, God was asking me if I was willing to do the assignments that He was giving me, despite the uncertain circumstances I was in.

Each crisis of belief is a new lesson in trusting Him when it is difficult to do so.

Hoping for what I cannot see, as yet.

Trusting, when there is no light at the end of the tunnel.

Now hope that is seen is not hope,

For who hopes for what he sees?

But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.

-Romans 8:24-25

This is the chapter of the life story I find myself in.

The chapter called, Willing and Obedient.

I am willing to do what God has called me to do, forgetting in a way, my own personal fears and struggles, and choosing instead to cast all my burdens at His feet, and joining Him in His work.

I have one favorite line: It's not about me.

My life is not about me, when all is said and done. Rather, it is all about what the Father is doing in me, and through me.

And so, as I was in Cambodia the past two weeks, together with my friends David and Tina, I heard the Lord say these words over and over again in my heart:

"...If you are willing and obedient,

You shall eat the good of the land;

But if you refuse and rebel,

You shall be devoured by the sword";

For the mouth of the LORD has spoken.

- Isaiah 1:19, 20

But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness,

and all these things shall be added to you.

- Matthew 6:33

And I must say, peace floods my whole being.

Here are a few photos of my recent journey: