An Unexpected Friendship

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Friendship isn't a big thing -- it's a million little things.

- Anonymous

No love, no friendship, can cross the path of our destiny 

without leaving some mark on it forever.

- Francois Mocuriac

A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart,

and can sing it back to you

when you have forgotten the words.

- Anonymous

Friendship that flows from the heart

cannot be frozen by adversity,

as the water that flow from the spring

cannot congeal in winter.

- James Fennimore Cooper

 Do not save your loving speeches for your friends till they are dead;

Do not write them on their tombstones,

Speak them rather now, instead.

- Anna Cummins

We cannot tell the precise moment when friendship is formed.
As in filling a vessel drop by drop,
there is at last one drop that makes it run over.
So in a series of kindness 
there is at last one drop
that makes the heart run over.
- James Boswell

I say good-bye to April with this post, and with it comes another opportunity to look back over the past weeks with gratitude... And my own humble way of giving God the honor for all that He has allowed in my life this month is to give it a name.

Naming the month as it ends enables me to take ownership of what God has entrusted to me, the lines, the paragraphs, even chapters He has added to the story of my life that He is writing.

I embrace the events as they come tiptoeing in, or barging in unannounced... because all of the circumstances of my life, I believe, are gifts of grace from the heart of a loving God. Not all of these circumstances are pleasant, but always, there is a heavenly perspective from which they can be viewed.

During the Elijah House School of Prayer Ministry, one teacher heard God say these very words to her in the midst of a season of pain: Someday in eternity I will explain everything to you, then you will understand.

Wow! Those words gripped my heart as if God were saying them to me.

And I believe He was. Someday... in eternity... God Himself will explain everything to me... then I will understand.

I look forward to that day when I will see Him face to face, and all my questions will be answered.

It's not how we think it will happen. Once I reach heaven, I believe there will be a knowing in our hearts. There will be no need for words, or for explanation. 

As I look back over the days and weeks of this month that is about to end, my mind is filling up with thoughts of heaven for really, despite the busyness and schedules to keep, this month has been such a gracious, gentle one to me.

In His goodness, in the midst of so much uncertainty in my own life, God breaks through and pours so much grace and kindness, my cup overflows... yet He keeps pouring in some more.

There are days when you feel so overwhelmed with His goodness.

As I write these words, I'm back in Manila. I arrived here two nights ago, and in a week's time, I leave the country on a ministry trip.

I left Bacolod City with a tinge of sadness because when I return, my beloved friend Trudi will no longer be there.

Trudi and I first met seven years ago, in 2005, when our team conducted an Ancient Paths seminar in Butuan, a city in the southern part of the Philippines. She was one of the participants who received deep level healing during the small group prayer ministry sessions.

Within that same year, the Lord confirmed that she was to move to Bacolod. Trudi had already been living in Butuan for five years, serving as a lay missionary in one of the local churches in the area. This was a major move for her. She packed all her belongings into a van, including Junbec her cat, her rabbit Norman, and a lizard named Leo. This van took her all the way to Cagayan de Oro where she boarded a ship that was to take her to the island where Bacolod is located.

It wasn't an easy feat for a young woman her age to undertake, but Trudi made it.

She moved into a house not too far from where I lived, and that is how Trudi and I began our relationship. She wanted to be part of our ministry team, so at the start, my role in her life was to be one of her mentors. On top of that, we also wanted to help her get settled down in our city, so I would visit her place often and offer whatever help I could give her.

One night, just a few months after she arrived, she texted me that her rabbit Norman had died. It was raining then, and I knew just how sad she must be feeling. So I offered to come over to help her bury her dear pet. I still remember how we both dug a hole in her garden, in the rain, and we were both crying... and with a little prayer, we laid Norman to rest.

On the morning that my husband Ernie died, Trudi was among the first people who came to be with me. She came with the most practical thing anyone could do - boxes of pancakes and cups of hot coffee for breakfast. She sat outside the emergency room, offering the food to members of my family. It was such a kind gesture I will never forget.

If I were to enumerate all the things Trudi and I have done together, I could end up writing a book!

All I really want to say at this point is that my friendship with Trudi is one I never expected to happen.

Trudi is twenty years younger than I am.

At the start I took on the role of a mentor... a mother who would be there to help see her through the initial stages of living in a new city, and guide her through the stages of becoming an important part of our ministry team.

We have been on countless ministry trips together - within the Philippines... to Singapore... to the Middle East.

And we have done many other things as well - like doing the Elijah House Schools. We've been on boats, planes, buses, trains together.

I do not know the precise moment when Trudi became a dear friend. But I woke up one morning and realized that she is indeed my beloved friend.

This May, Trudi will return to England for good. She knew that her season in this country was ending, and that God was already calling her to a different direction. 

I will miss Trudi... I really will. Even right this very moment I cannot imagine what life will be like without her. I could always count on her to come with me to Starbucks, or to help me decide which suitcase to buy, then drag that suitcase all over town, go to a beachfront to share an early morning quiet moment with... or to the Talisay flea market on a Friday morning looking for cheap bargains. I will miss our Saturday morning prayer time, praying for Israel and for the Philippines!

She is a friend who has been so much fun to be with. There is so much song and laughter in our friendship!

Being Trudi's friend has made me feel very young... like twenty years younger or more! Yet, I can share the pain and the anxieties of my heart with her, and I know that my secrets are safe with her.

Trudi has a very large heart, and because she is not self-focused, she is not easily offended. She is not a demanding friend. Trudi is a very good listener. She has an understanding heart.

When I first met Trudi, she had a restless spirit... but today, seven years later, we can just sit quietly sipping our coffee, and we would not even have to say anything. I see many beautiful qualities today in Trudi that were not so evident a few years ago. I have seen her walk through the many difficult issues of her life and receive healing for them. Yes, Trudi has mellowed beautifully, and I have really watched her grow up to maturity before my very eyes.

But good-byes in this life are inevitable. Seasons come, and seasons go. 

 During my last few days in Bacolod, Trudi and I made it a point to see each other everyday. 

At Delicioso - sharing alio oglio and a plate of cold cuts and cheese.

 

It was such a special way of saying good-bye to each other.

At Jacopo, where we enjoyed lamb biryani, khbuz (flatbread) and hummus.

When I think of my friendship with Trudi, I can't help but think of how good God is in giving me Trudi for a friend. 

Taken after The Question for Young Women seminar

Yes, it is true... a true friend is God's way of taking care of us.

On the day I left, Trudi came over to have breakfast with me at home. After breakfast, we celebrated our friendship by having the Lord's Supper together. What a beautiful time it was for us, for indeed it is because of what Jesus has done on the cross that has brought redemption to our relationships.

Eternal friendships are possible because Jesus paid the price for it.

Last picture together, at my garden

And heaven will be such a wonderful place to come home to... because it is there that we will be spending eternity with people we love - forever, without end. 

There will be no good-byes in heaven.

Though it's hard to let you go
In the Father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends...

This isn't good-bye but "Fare thee well," my friend. God gave you to me at a time when my heart was grieving for the loss of my husband, and you don't know it, but you have helped bring healing to me. By your selflessness, by your cheerfulness, by your positive spirit, by your kindness, and your humility. You never pretended to know all the answers, you were just so eager to learn new things from me.

You were so right when you said that "our friendship is unique because it crosses many boundaries - age, culture, intellect, and more." I never even thought of that. But did you ever know Trud that I have learned so many things from you? Just by being yourself, you have taught me much.

And yes, I agree with you when you said that "our friendship is special because of unconditional love and acceptance both ways."  Thank you for loving me, Trudi.

I will always love you my dear friend.

Here is my song for you, my favorite of all favorites: Cavatina by John Williams. Whenever I listen to it, I will think of you.

I name this month in honor of our friendship:

image source

A Road Named Compassion

"Early Morning Sagada"
Sagada, Mountain Province, Philippines
by Jojo Nicdao

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He has shown you, O man, what is good;
And what does the Lord require of you
But to do justly,
To love mercy,
And to walk humbly with your God?
- Micah 6:8





Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed,
Because His compassions fail not.
They are new every morning;
Great is Your faithfulness.
“The Lord is my portion,” says my soul,
“Therefore I hope in Him!”
The Lord is good to those who wait for Him,
To the soul who seeks Him.
It is good that one should hope and wait quietly
For the salvation of the Lord.

- Lamentations 3:22-26

“On that day I will raise up
The tabernacle of David, which has fallen down,
And repair its damages;
I will raise up its ruins,
And rebuild it as in the days of old;
That they may possess the remnant of Edom,
And all the Gentiles who are called by My name,”
says the Lord who does this thing.

“Behold, the days are coming,” says the Lord,
“When the plowman shall overtake the reaper,
And the treader of grapes him who sows seed;
The mountains shall drip with sweet wine,
And all the hills shall flow with it.
I will bring back the captives of My people Israel;
They shall build the waste cities and inhabit them;
They shall plant vineyards and drink wine from them;
They shall also make gardens and eat fruit from them.
I will plant them in their land,
And no longer shall they be pulled up
From the land I have given them,”
Says the Lord your God.

- Amos 9:11-15

My last entry for this weblog was written twenty days ago. It was my intention to write an end-of-the-month post to recapitulate the events of March, and to give the month a name, but I didn't want to force myself to do it then.

There were just too many things going on at that time, and as much as possible, I never want to do a hastily written, haphazard, half-baked blog post.

Now that I have more time, I can re-visit the events of the past weeks and share what God has been speaking to me.

On March 30, just seven days after my return to Bacolod, I was back in Manila. My cousin Bobby was celebrating his 70th birthday on April 1, and he and his wife Girlie were celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary as well. Bobby is my first cousin on my father's side of the family; he and I are the only ones from our extended family residing here in the Philippines. The four other first cousins, including my only sister, live with their families in Canada and the USA.

Bobby and Girlie moved to the southern part of the Philippines with their two young children in 1971 when I was only 18 years old. That was over forty years ago. Since then we have seen one another only a few times.

Bobby and Girlie, on their 50th wedding anniversary

This was a good reason to return to Manila, and I am so glad I did.

Bobby and Girlie's eldest daughter Isabel, who is now a successful architect in Maryland, USA, was back home for the special occasion.

Isabel and her American husband, Tom

It was so good to be able to reconnect with her and with the rest of my nephews and cousins.

Three generations: Bobby, his son Jay, and Jay's son Gab.
Jay and Gab are almost carbon copies of Bobby. Amazing!

Bobby and Girlie with their whole family:
Nick (Isabel's son), Toni, Gab and Jay,
Isabel and Tom, Tommee ( youngest son of Bobby and Girlie),
Chinee and Tom-tom, children of Peggy and Butch (Bobby and Girlie's eldest son)

My first cousin Fred and his wife Leila who reside in British Columbia, Canada, were also in Manila. What a blessed opportunity it was for me to be with my side of the family again.

Obedient One, me, my first cousin Fred and his wife Leila

Three first cousins: me, Bobby, and Fred

Compassion...

Grace...

Mercy...

In the less than perfect circumstances of my life, God grants me many opportunities to experience His perfect grace and His abundant mercy.

My only sister was in Manila for almost four months and we had a special time of bonding and reconnecting with each other.

Having been with beloved members of my extended family is just one of the many gifts God has given me this month.

In mid March, Amber Smith, daughter of my blog friend Rebecca (of Life and Godliness) was in Manila for a ministry trip, and we met!

Amber and me

Also in mid March, my friend Louella who now lives in Dar es Salaam, Tanzania, was in town for a few weeks, and we took time to see each other, even for just a few hours.

with Louella

When I arrived back in Bacolod on March 23 after my month-long stay in Manila, a garden in full bloom was waiting for me. The days had been sunny in the morning and rainy in the afternoon, providing the perfect combination that plants love. Worshiper and Chosen One had also started a small vegetable garden.

At the Bacolod Silay Airport
"I Love Bacolod" - where the sky is always blue and air is always fresh!

My family, and especially my grandsons Forerunner and Full of Hope, were so delighted to see me!

My dear dogs looked healthy and well cared for.

It felt so good to return to a home that was very clean, surrounded by an atmosphere of love and peace.

My best friend Melanie arrived from Virginia USA on the second week of March. It was a special treat to have her around on my 59th birthday.

The former president of Maejo University in Chiang Mai, Thailand, Dr. Thep Phongparnich, was in Bacolod City for a few days toward the end of March. He was conferred the degree Doctor of Humanities honoris causa by the West Negros University. My sister in law Sue gave a testimonial dinner in his honor and the evening was such a beautiful event, with Filipino dances, songs, and testimonial speeches.

Seated: Dr. Thep and his colleagues
Standing: me and Diana Jantakad, Dr. Thep's Filipina secretary

Our family really looks up to Dr. Thep, for it was during his term that Ernie served in Maejo University for a whole year as a foreign consultant, having set up the curriculum for the International MBA program for the university during that time.

On March 27, my birthday, I literally had a whole day celebration of my special day. My dear friends Melanie, Buddy, Trudi, and Pat came over for breakfast.

Melanie's birthday gift for me, a special necklace (see close up picture below)

My family celebrated the occasion with me by preparing a special lunch.


In the afternoon my friend Melanie, Miriam and I had coffee and pastry at our favorite coffee place, Starbucks.




And in the evening, my dear ministry team family prepared a special birthday dinner for me.

Nikki, Trudi, Ruby, Minerva
me and Pat

It really turns out this way almost each year - my birthday seems such a special event that is celebrated in a special way!

During my brief five-day return trip to Manila, I was able to treat my dear friends Tina, Rosemarie, and Donna to a delightful birthday lunch at our favorite restaurant, the Cyma Greek Taverna in Greenbelt, Makati City.

Clockwise: Rosemarie, Donna, me and Tina

Rosemarie's birthday gift for me, One New Man Bible

On the eve of my return to Bacolod, Rosemarie, Tina, Donna, and I, together with a few other friends spent a night of worship at Rosemarie's home. We listened to Ruth Fazal's anointed CD entitled Joy in the Night. We were on our knees as we worshiped our God and King. It was a wonderful ending to my brief stay in Manila.

On April 4 I returned once again to my home city of Bacolod. The next day my only daughter Obedient One arrived on the dawn flight from Manila. Although she had not yet slept, she joined our whole family for an early lunch at the local beach where we feasted on steamed baby oysters and grilled tilapia and young coconuts.

God given and Forerunner

Obedient One and Full of Hope

The local beach is not the best there is in this country, but I really love this beach for its memories.

Grandsons with their Nana

It is here where Ernie and I would go every Saturday... yes, that is right, we went to this beach E-V-E-R-Y Saturday for the first twelve years of our married life. At the start it was just the two of us, then First Born came into the picture... then Worshiper... and then Obedient One was born. Saturday was our special family beach outing day, and through the years we had acquired a wide assortment of beach paraphernalia like toy buckets, plastic shovels, beach chairs, hammocks, a portable radio, and beach tableware. Name it, we had it.

Worshiper and Chosen One

That local beach in Punta Taytay is indeed a place full of warm memories for me.


On Good Friday our family had our Passover meal. We were complete as a family, and my friend Melanie and her husband Edward were also with us.

Passover candles, Edward (Melanie's husband) in background

me and Melanie, after the Passover meal

On Resurrection Sunday morning we went to the early sunrise worship service at our church. The songs we sang were so meaningful, as was the word that was preached... then good coffee and breakfast for everyone were served after the service.

Obedient One with her two sisters in law

We had a Resurrection Sunday family lunch at the home of Ernie's sister Sue.

God given and First Born

My three children: First Born, Worshiper and Obedient One

Obedient One with her Aunt Lei

Indeed, that day was such a special time of remembering the Lord's resurrection.


The month of March was really beautiful... full of touching reminders of God's mercy and grace.


Compassion... This is the name of the road I have travelled on these past weeks.

Our Creator God never designed us to carry heavy burdens. Whatever our life circumstances have been in the past, whatever painful experiences we have gone through, even if certain people have been unkind, unfaithful, or unfair to us... none of these is a statement of our true value in the eyes of God our Maker.

I am a person of eternal worth in my Father's eyes!

His heart is full of compassion for you and me. His heart is overflowing with love, and He is always finding ways to communicate that love to us.

Jesus invites us to come to Him, to cease from striving, and understand what it means to rest in Him.

The One New Man Bible puts it beautifully:

You must immediately take My yoke upon you,
and you must now learn from Me,
because I am gentle and humble in my heart,
and you will find rest in your lives:
for My yoke is pleasant and My burden is insignificant.

- Matthew 11:29, 30

My yoke is pleasant.

My burden is insignificant.

This burden spoken of by Jesus is literally described "light as a feather" in the original Greek.

As I look back over the past weeks the impression I am receiving is that God's heart is brimming over with compassion for me, and His desire is to let me, His daughter, be keenly aware of the goodness flowing out of His heart.

Whatever conflicts or difficulties we may have experienced in life are definitely not part of His plan or His design. These come possibly as a consequence of our own disobedience or wrong choices... or of other people's wrong decisions that have somehow affected us. Difficulties could also come because of a demonic attack or assignment against us or our loved ones, but never does affliction or adversity come from the heart of God.

He may allow hardships for a season, but always... always... for a divine reason. And I have learned not to give doubt or bitterness any room in my heart when the going gets rough. God is ever near, and His hand of compassion is always reaching out to me!

Yes, indeed... my heavenly Father's heart overflows with compassion! How He desires nothing but the best for each one of us who is called by His name!

And as a result, I am indeed thankful for how God continues to help me simplify my outlook in life. Travelling light... grateful for simple joys... and made happy by simple desires!

As March has come to an end, and April is almost halfway through, I am rejoicing for the way He has allowed me to experience His compassion. It's not that I have never felt it before... but somehow these past weeks I have seen God's kindness and generosity touching my life through the goodness of others!

more birthday gifts and cards

from my sister in law Faith

handwritten card from Trudi

from First Born and God given

from my friend Buddy

My sister gave me a special birthday gift. My sister in law Sue gave a birthday dinner for me on Resurrection Monday. My sister in law Faith sent a gift all the way from California. There were text messages, email, electronic cards as well. Very many blog friends sent greetings.

It's not really about me. It's about me experiencing the goodness of God in the land of the living.

He has put a song in my heart... strewn fragrant petals of gladness along the way ... He has filled my mouth with laughter!

These splashes of joy that have touched my heart these past weeks are but a tiny glimpse of what God is like! I am truly grateful that He is my God, and that He has called me by name.

My heart rests secure in this truth: There is a coming season of restoration and rest.

Although I wasn't able to write an end of the month post for March, it's not too late to give it a name.

I name the month of March Compassion.




My song for this part of my journey is a beautiful and powerful song by Lincoln Brewster, Power of Your Name. The lyrics and video are posted below. In the instrumental intro, Lincoln's grandmother plays the piano after which the percussive rhythmic beat, the actual sound of the heartbeat of his son Liam taken during a sonogram, is heard. This same beat is once again distinctly heard toward the end of the song as Darlene Zschech sings the chorus.

It give me goose bumps to listen to this song. I can't listen to it just once... something in me wants to keep listening to it, especially as I realize that no human being can make our heart beat so rhythmically... pumping the blood to nourish every cell in our body. It is an act of divine compassion and mercy and grace...

This song is a powerful reminder to me. Every morning, I am to be thankful for the life that I have been given... never to waste a single moment of it, but to use all of it to accomplish the specific assignment and kingdom purpose that God has for me.

Power of Your Name
written by Lincoln Brewster and Mia Fieldes

Surely children weren't made for the streets
And fathers were not made to leave
Surely this isn't how it should be
Let Your Kingdom come

Surely nations were not made for war
Or the broken meant to be ignored
Surely this just can't be what You saw
Let Your Kingdom come
Here in my heart

And I will live
To carry Your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet
And I will give
With the life that I've been given
And go beyond religion
To see the world be changed
By the power of Your name
The power of Your name

Surely life wasn't made to regret
And the lost were not made to forget
Surely faith without action is dead
Let Your Kingdom come
Lord break this heart

Oh, and I will live
To carry Your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet
And I will give
With the life that I've been given
And go beyond religion
To see the world be changed
By the power of Your name


Jesus Your name
Is a shelter for the hurting
and Your name
Is a refuge for the weak
Only Your name
Can redeem the undeserving
Jesus Your name
Holds everything I need

And I will live
To carry Your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet
And I will give
With the life that I've been given
And go beyond religion
To see this world be changed
By the power of Your name

And I will live
To carry Your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet
And I will give
With the life that I've been given
And go beyond religion
To see the world be changed
By the power of Your name

The power of Your name...