Happy First Birthday, Matt!

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,
The fruit of the womb is a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,
So are the children of one's youth.

-Psalm 127:3-4

Today is the last day of October, and I want to write this special post about my grandson, Matthew.

October 20 marked Matt's first birthday.

It is an important milestone in this young boy's life, so it was of course, a cause of rejoicing for our family.

His mom, God-given, had the wonderful idea of having "Twelve Months of Blessing" as the theme for her son's birthday party.

I asked my friends Raffi and Honey Grace to make a special birthday cake for the occasion. In addition to the small cake for the birthday candle, there were twelve cupcakes for each month of the year topped with tiny fruits and a character trait, the blessing that I had prayed for my grandson for that particular month. There were also 24 additional cupcakes for the guests to enjoy!








I also offered to do the decors depicting the birthday theme -- truly a labor of love for me!



Indeed, Matt's coming into this world has given our family twelve months of blessing!

My special prayer for his twelfth month, and first year of his life, is for God's favor to rest on him.

And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature,
and in favor with God and men.

~Luke 2:52

My dear grandson, Forerunner,

On this your first birthday, I want to thank God for having created you, and brought you into this world.

You have been a blessing, not a burden. You have been such a bundle of joy in our midst, and we thank God for the gift of you.

Today, I pray that Luke 2:52 will be true in your life. May you truly grow in wisdom, in stature, and in favor with God and with men.

May you mature through the seasons of your life,

may you reach great heights spiritually,

and above all, may God's favor surround you as a shield, wherever you go.

Today, on the first year of your life, I declare that nothing will hinder you from walking in the path toward your destiny.

Your God-given identity will be intact because the enemy will never succeed in making you believe lies about God, and about yourself. May you grow up being secure emotionally.

May these words of Scripture be true in your life:

For the LORD God is a sun and shield;

the LORD bestows favor and honor;

no good thing does he withhold

from those whose walk is blameless. - Psalm 84:11

Dear Forerunner, may you grow up to be a tree of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified!

Below are some pictures taken by Uncle Worshiper on this special day:

The star of the day, with his mom.

Here's Matt, with his mom and dad, listening to all his guests singing the "Happy Birthday" song...

Me, Trudi, and Ruby

Here's Auntie Obedient One holding the December cupcake!

Life and Healing for Our Land

But to you who fear My name
The Sun of Righteousness shall arise
With healing in His wings...

- Malachi 4:2

A new typhoon (international code name- MIRINAE) is threatening our country. As of late last night, a NASA report said that it was 480 nautical miles east of Manila, its eye expected to make landfall at around 8 a.m. of Saturday morning, Asia/Pacific time.

After the two tropical cyclones that devastated parts of Northern Philippines just last month, news of any approaching storm sends jitters to our hearts.

Thousands dead, thousands of homes destroyed or wiped out, millions of people affected, and billions of pesos lost in ruined crops and infrastructure. This is just part of the quantifiable damage.

But the real loss can't be measured or stated in statistical, quantifiable terms. As I shared in a previous post entitled Room Enough, the wounds inflicted by the recent storms run deep.

Deep in the hearts of the people, and deep in the heart of our nation, many wounds remain fresh and unhealed.

There are wounds of grief, fear, and trauma, to name a few.

Tears still come to my eyes as I look at some video accounts of the twin calamities that hit us, said to be the worst in 40-50 years.

Below are a couple of heart-wrenching videos that have deeply stirred my heart... but the truth is, the videos have failed to capture the real story, the story that God alone knows.

For indeed, only He can fathom the depth and the intensity of the grief and the pain, the individual stories of loss behind the scenes, the feelings of abandonment and devastation that will never be given words...

My friends and I have lifted up prayers and contributed cash and goods for the ongoing relief operations... but honestly, I cannot imagine what it must have been like to be up on rooftops for 16-20 hours under blinding rain, and having saved nothing but the very clothes on one's back.

My heart is gripped, and tears fall from my eyes... I cannot really imagine what it is like to lose everything, to have nothing to go back to.


But this much I know: after the storms come the sure process of rebuilding and restoration.

The human body has the tremendous capacity to heal itself. Our heart was created for hope. God never designed our bodies for death, we were meant to live forever in eternity!

The Tree of Life stood in the middle of the garden of Eden, and God gave the invitation to Adam and Eve to freely eat of it.

Man has fallen, and we do live in a fallen world, and the enemy would have us remain trapped in fear...

cover our eyes with the veil of deception,

cause us to walk the path of hopelessness and despair.


But the amazing truth is that Jesus, the Son of God has already given His life to pay our ransom and to redeem us from enemy territory.

We now have the freedom to choose death, or choose life!


I believe that historical events, and natural catastrophes... yes, even those that do not affect me directly, still have a divine purpose in my personal life.

John Donne once wrote:


...any man's death diminishes me,
for I am involved in mankind...
and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls,
it tolls for thee.


There's so much beauty and truth in these lines of poetry!

We do not live our lives in solitary confinement.

And so I found myself in tears many years ago when Princess Diana died, and grieving with America on that September 11 morning when New York City was attacked by terrorists.

I have cried often the past month, while praying or looking at the news... and though I didn't personally experience the floods, and my homes and loved ones are intact, I could feel the pain of those who suffered loss.

My heart identifies with the pain of my fellow human being.

And while weeping with those who weep, and grieving with those who grieve...somehow I have also experienced a new level of growth because of this.

In the midst of the pain, there was a surge of new life inside of me!



Life is defined by growth and change, whether in stages, or in cycles.

And where there is life, there is growth.

Growth always involves a season of dying. The process of growth includes pain, gold is purified in a crucible, a baby grows in a dark womb, a seed has to go into the earth and die before it can begin to grow.


These days I have been thinking of what God is saying to me personally, and to our nation, in the aftermath of the calamities that many of my countrymen are still reeling from.

I remember Pastor Edgar's word to us when the floods devastated portions of Metro Manila: "The floods have come that we may be brought to higher ground."

The floods dislodge us, let us break free from our moorings, and suddenly we find ourselves adrift on open seas.

Painful as it is, this is an invitation for us to go up higher, to come closer, to experience life at a higher level.

I hasten to say that this is not an attempt to oversimplify the circumstances, or to belittle another person's pain, like putting a band-aid over a gaping wound.

The awesome truth is that there is a God who truly cares when the storms come. We are not left to our own devices.

He is issuing the call to draw nearer, hold on to Him, the Rock that can never be shaken.



But there is an enemy who sees his opportunity... to steal, to kill, to destroy.

And daily we walk, we trudge through this valley, the valley of the shadow of death. Satan aims his fiery darts at us, "death missiles," that's what we call them.

He constantly whispers, "Walk in fear! Live in fear!"

But we are free to make a choice: believe the enemy, or believe what the Lord is saying.


Will you listen to what the enemy says, or will you listen to what I am saying? I hear the Lord asking me.

The choice is yours to make. Will you believe what your natural eyes can see, or will you choose to look at these recent events, using your spiritual eyes?

Will you believe in My agenda, or will you put more weight on the enemy's strategies and schemes?

Will you come closer, or will you stay where you are?

These questions are truly thought-provoking. I know I have to listen to the right voices.



Our God says:

I have come to give you life!
- John 10:10


So I will restore to you the years
that the swarming locust has eaten!
- Joel 2:25


..I will raise up the tabernacle of David
which has fallen down,
and repair its damages,
I will raise up its ruins,
And rebuild it as in the days of old.
- Amos 9:11


Have you not known,
Have you not heard?
The everlasting God, the LORD
The Creator of the ends of the earth
Neither faints nor is weary
His understanding is unsearchable
He gives power to the weak
To those who have no might
He increases strength...
- Isaiah 40:28-29


Now I saw a new heaven and a new earth
for the first heaven and the first earth
had passed away...
Then He who sat on the throne said,
"Behold I make all things new."
Revelation 21:1, 4

There are hundreds more of such life-giving words and promises of restoration in the Bible!

And so the Father has the right to ask, "Whose words will you believe?"

Many of my fellow Filipinos in the Luzon islands are still in evacuation centers because they no longer have homes to go home to. Floods have not receded in many parts. And then the threat of another strong typhoon, about to make landfall in Southern Luzon.

I went to bed last night asking God to protect our northern islands from another storm. When I awoke early this morning this Scripture passage from Malachi 4:2 was ringing in my ears:

To you who fear my name,
The Sun of Righteousness shall arise
With healing in His wings...

The heavenly Father was asking, "Will you fear the enemy and believe his lies? Or will you revere my name, and believe the truth that I speak?

It is so easy to believe the words of Satan: "Be afraid! Beware! Nothing good will come out of it! Everything is beyond hope and recovery. The only way to go is down."

Planting seeds of death.



I believe Malachi records the following words for us, to warn us, and also to encourage us:

Then those who feared the Lord spoke to one another,
And the Lord listened and heard them
So a book of remembrance was written before Him
For those who fear the Lord
and meditate on His name.

"They shall be Mine," says the Lord,
"On the day that I make them my jewels.
And I will spare them
as a man spares his own son who serves him."

Then you shall again discern
between the righteous and the wicked,
Between one who serves God
and one who does not serve Him.

Malachi 3:16-18

There are certain passages in the Bible that strike me with awe. This is one of them.

If God is putting our tears in a bottle, these verses say that He is also writing down our words of faith...the words of encouragement that we speak to one another, the words of our lips that are the fruit of a heart that fears God.

And He promises that we will be His jewels, we will be spared because of our own words of faith! There will be a distinction between those who speak words of faith and words of doubt!

Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

I will choose to believe, even when my eyes tell me recovery seems impossible at this point. There is a lighthouse that shines in the darkest night, there is hope, there is promise.

My Father, I choose life...

How I want my words to be written down in this scroll of remembrance...

My words of faith which say that God will restore, He will heal. He will rebuild. He will repair.

My Father, I put my hope in You...


Luke 21:28 is quite direct. Read what it says:

Now when these things begin to take place,
straighten up and raise your heads,
because your redemption is drawing near.

This is a time to look up in hope, and not be weighed down by despair!

I speak these redemptive words to my fellow Filipinos:


My dear countrymen, be encouraged by these words, receive life.

Choose hope! Choose life!

God is pouring new oil in our midst!

The hills are dripping with new wine!

The fields are filled with new grain!

Bangon, Pilipinas! Muli tayong mabubuhay! Buhayin natin ang pag-asa! Manalig tayo sa Panginoong Diyos! (Rise up, Philippines! There is life. Let us keep hope alive. Let us put our faith in God!)

Thank You Lord, for You hear our prayers, You will heal our land! In wrath, remember mercy, dear God!

From Cyberspace to Real Life!

This postcard from a blog friend arrived in the mail today!

Behold, how good and pleasant it is
when brothers dwell in unity!


- Psalm 133:1

It was a lazy kind of morning with nothing urgent on my to do list. The carpenter is scraping off the old paint in my old kitchen, then he will apply a new coat. There are on going repairs being done, but I don't want to be in a frenzy about this. I will be cleaning out some kitchen cabinets one day at a time within the next few days.

This is the first time in months that I am finally staying home for a considerable chunk of time to focus on the home front. Read more....

Letting Go

Abraham and Isaac

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for,
the evidence of things not seen.

- Hebrews 11:1




And without faith it is impossible to please God,
because anyone who comes to Him
must believe that He exists
and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him.

- Hebrews 11:6

In my recent posts I have shared how my heart has been battered by many concerns -- firstly for my daughter Obedient One who was held up at gun point just outside our home about a month ago, and secondly, the two typhoons that recently left a massive devastation in the northern part of our country.

I arrived in Manila from our UAE trip on September 27 and had intended to stay only two days with my daughter before returning to my home in Bacolod City. But because of what happened to her, I decided it was best to be with her, until her scheduled trip to Cambodia on October 9.

Obedient One and her friends visited Angkor Wat in Cambodia and stayed there for a week. Upon arriving back in Manila, she boarded another flight to Bacolod City to spend time with our family for a few days and to join us for Matthew's first birthday last October 20.

We really had a wonderful time together as a family again, especially as we celebrated my grandson's first birthday, a milestone in his young life.

Obedient One returned to Manila yesterday.

--0--

A good friend of mine, Elena, was diagnosed with an arteriovenous malformation (AVM) near the base of her brain. She was given two options of treatment: gamma radiation, or a brain surgery to remove the malformation, a twisted clump of blood vessels. She opted for surgery, a procedure that is certainly not risk-free. One wrong move of the surgeon's hand and she could lose part of her vision, or worse, be disabled for life.

She underwent surgery the other day.

--0--

Another friend of mine, Lagi, met an accident a week ago. A truck hit the SUV she was driving, and as a result, she suffered a stroke. She is still in the Intensive Care Unit, the left side of her body paralyzed.

--0--

My sister in law Sue also had an accident while she was in the US six months ago. The car they were riding was hit from behind by a speeding vehicle, and Sue, to this day is suffering from neck and facial muscles spasms and intense pain as a result of the impact. She is still undergoing therapy for this, but clearly, the recovery is going to be a slow and painful process.

--0--

One Sunday night last month, on September 20 to be exact, in my hotel room in the UAE, I suddenly found myself overcome with sadness and grief. I was already in bed getting ready to sleep and listening to Jessie Rogers sing Who Can Compare in her beautiful, soulful way.

The feelings just came in unannounced, taking me by surprise. I was filled with such a longing for heaven, my heavenly home, as I found myself singing along with Jessie while she sang the lines... so filled with meaning and hope...


Who can compare to You my Lord,
You're everything that I adore,
and all of my life is in the palm of Your hand...

And all of my heart I give to You,
all that I am and all I do,
who can compare to You?

(Who Can Compare, in Jessie Rogers' Out of the Fire CD)


Tears started falling from my eyes onto my pillow, and I couldn't control my sobs. I really felt so sad, feeling so alone. I missed my husband and realized that after all these months, I had not really grieved his death. There have been so many things happening one after the other from the day he died.

And so I just allowed myself to cry, and to sob, and to just ask the Lord to come and put His arms around me, to comfort me. I asked Him to come visit me. How I really needed to feel His presence.

This went on for hours. There was no tangible holy presence that came, but just allowing the tears to freely fall, and to feel the grief, the pain, the loss... brought about a comfort that I needed to feel at that time.

It just amazes me that it was in this strange land, so far away from home, that my Father chose to let my feelings come to the surface. I was able to offer my pain to Him, and received yet another layer of healing for my heart.

The next day, my heart still felt soft and tender from the encounter that I had with my Father. I treasured the experience, and though the sadness was still there, the comfort was just as real.

Heaven is real. And my husband is there. Enjoying the presence of God. And one day, I will see him again.



Friends have asked me how I cope with the loss.

To be honest, although there are days when I miss my husband, I have never really felt a desire to leave this world to be with him. There is no wishing for death, as if life stopped having any kind of meaning for me when he passed away.

It is quite clear to me that there is another level, a higher plain where God is bringing me. It is a process of growing and maturing in my faith journey.

God has given me a mission statement: to be a prophetic intercessor, an agent of healing in the lives of people He sends my way. I am also the prophet and the priest that stands guard and keeps watch at the doorway of our family, a spiritual role that I take seriously. And for these purposes, I know God is allowing me to go through an intensive equipping process as well.

--0--

One night in Manila, a few weeks ago, I couldn't sleep. God was impressing names of people on my heart that He wanted me to pray for. For two hours or so, I kept praying for Sue, for my friend Elena, for my children First Born, God-given, Worshiper, and Obedient One. God was in the room with me, and I didn't have the English words to pray... so I began praying in my prayer language, and it went on non-stop. As this went on, there was a heavenly peace that I felt, and I knew God was allowing me to pray the prayers that were on His heart.

And this really is the best prayer we can offer, not the prayers of our own human understanding, but the prayers of His heart.

--0--

As I awoke this morning, my heart was struggling. I was thinking of my daughter Obedient One... of my First Born... of my friends Elena, of Lagi, of my sister in law Sue.

The picture of Abraham about to slay his son Isaac on the altar was on my mind. I knew there was another faith lesson underway.

Andrea of A Feast of Light wrote about faith on her latest blog post, Collision. Obviously, Andrea and I have been going through the same faith lessons these past weeks.

She writes about the collision of our flesh with our faith, and I quote part of it here:

Collision of faith and flesh is stunning. It is gritty reality right in your face. It can be quite rude and ugly. Its abruptness raises personal inspection, a microscopic look of survival faith, that part of your life in God that is left when living gives you less than best, or worse that worst.

A simple knowledge of God, dear friends, is not breath enough for survival faith. No, survival faith, the shattered remains from collision of faith and flesh, must have something more. Deep roots, fertile soil, good water, tender care. A divine taproot that glues faith fibers together, so that no tugging, pulling, or digging can transplant or destroy our life in God.

I wholeheartedly agree with her when she says that a simple knowledge of God is not enough. What she calls "survival faith" is the shattered remains from collision of faith and flesh...and it must have something more, something deeper.

Years ago I have decided that I will be known as a woman of faith; when my earthly life is over, I want to leave behind a legacy of faith.

It hasn't been an easy road, learning to live a life of faith. Most of the time I have had to learn my faith lessons the hard way.

Just as Abraham was required to leave the comfortable and familiar confines of his home, I chose to embrace a deeper faith, letting go of my mere intellectual understanding of the religious rituals that I was brought up under, and going into the deeper waters of a heart transforming faith.

James puts it this way:

Therefore lay aside all filthiness
and overflow of wickedness,
and receive with meekness the implanted word,
which is able to save your souls.

But be doers of the word,
and not hearers only,
deceiving yourselves.

- James 1:21-22

I grew up thinking that hearing the word was enough... doing the rituals, going through the motions of my religion.

I was earnest and sincere, but I didn't know how to make my faith work.

Then the Lord confronted me in what I will call my Damascus Road experience.

One day I realized that simply hearing the word was not going to save me. This led me through a faith crisis. I share a little bit about this experience in Face to Face, a post I wrote during our last few months in Chiang Mai, Thailand.

I first encountered God at a a deeper level thirty-six years ago, but it is only in the past decade that I understood the difference between presumptuous faith and a broken faith.

Like David, I thought I was ready for war. And in all honesty, I thought my heart was humble, not arrogant. But God desires a brokenness in our faith, and this is where the wilderness experience comes in. Before David was fit to be king, God allowed his faith to be broken in the wilderness where no amount of "faith posturings" could help.

There were times when my faith, instead of serving the purposes of God, served my human flesh. It caused me to desire to use my so called faith to look good in the eyes of others, and promote my own agenda instead of God's.

Then the reversals came. Sickness, financial ruin, failed businesses, relationships turning sour...many other forms of devastation.

What Andrea calls survival faith, I call broken faith.

Bob Sorge, in his book The Fire of Delayed Answers writes about this kind of faith:

God taught David how to be a man of faith...and none of the lessons he learned previously was applicable anymore. In this way, God broke David's framework and understanding of faith and then began to totally rebuild it.

David would rise again in faith, but this time it would be a faith that would be devoid of all self-confidence and trust in human strength.

Broken faith is faith that endures, because it has been tested in the crucible, the way gold is proven and purified. Broken faith will refuse to be offended at others, or even God, when we feel we have not been treated right. Broken faith will keep holding on to God.

Abraham was called to leave his comfort zone and his obedience led him through that great journey of faith. Years later, he would be asked to yield his son, Isaac, in a major test of faith.

Abraham passed this test, but it was not really the kind of test that anyone looks forward to going through.

It has been said that all of life is a test of faith, because a broken and tested faith is what will save our souls on that final day of judgment...it is the faith that doesn't merely hear the word, but does it!

God wants to make sure that we have the right kind of faith.

And I am truly grateful to Him for allowing me to experience many such faith testings in my life.

--0--

I almost went to Manila with Obedient One yesterday. My heart as a mother wants to protect her, to be with her... sometimes I think that Obedient One is still a little girl, and that if I am with her, she will be safe.

But God spoke clearly to my heart. I don't want you to go to Manila at this time. You are also needed here; there is work to be done here for now.


When God speaks, I must obey. But please, dear friends, I need you to pray with me.

Yes, Obedient One's faith is growing, even as she needs to learn more faith lessons on her own. And I need to let her go, again. She is safe and secure in the arms of God, her heavenly Father. Let us continually ask God to cover her with His favor, day and night.

First Born son received a job promotion last week. We had been praying for this, and it was granted. Nevertheless join me as I continue to pray for God's healing hand to be upon his heart, for he continues to hold on to many unresolved issues in the area of unforgiveness.

Forerunner, my grandson celebrated his first birthday three days ago. I am praying for spiritual awareness for him, a hunger for God, protection from demonic schemes, and wisdom to be upon his parents to nurture and train him in the way he should go, as he enters his first year of life.

Preparations are underway for my son Worshiper and his fiancee Chosen One's wedding this December. We are praying for good weather, and for all plans to go smoothly, giving glory and honor to God alone.

My friend Elena is out of danger. She is already sitting up, and talking. Her vision was not impaired. Her CT scan shows that the cauterized portions of the blood vessels removed from her brain are not in danger of hemorrhaging. She was not disabled in anyway. Even her doctors are amazed at her quick recovery. We praise God for answering our prayers, and let us continue to pray that no post surgical complications will arise.

Be with me in my ongoing prayers for God's healing intervention in the lives of my friend Lagi and my sister in law Sue.

--0--

As I am about the end this post, I thank God that He has given me a deeper understanding of broken faith, this life of faith that I desire.

The kind of faith that God rewards is not an intellectual faith. What good is it if my faith is in mere words?

Today, I thank You Father for speaking to me again about the faith that You desire, an active, mountain-moving faith. A faith that will not crumble when it collides with my earthly realities, but will remain steadfast and strong.

Father I want my life of faith to be a shining light to those around me. May my faith not be one that will give glory to me, but to You alone. Indeed, my Father, You are the author and the finisher of my faith!

My Faith Looks Up To Thee

My faith looks up to Thee,
Thou Lamb of Calvary, Savior divine!
Now hear me while I pray, take all my guilt away,
O let me from this day be wholly Thine!

May Thy rich grace impart
Strength to my fainting heart, my zeal inspire!
As Thou hast died for me, O may my love to Thee,
Pure warm, and changeless be, a living fire!

While life’s dark maze I tread,
And griefs around me spread, be Thou my Guide;
Bid darkness turn to day, wipe sorrow’s tears away,
Nor let me ever stray from Thee aside.

When ends life’s transient dream,
When death’s cold sullen stream over me roll;
Blest Savior, then in love, fear and distrust remove;
O bear me safe above, a ransomed soul!

Read the story of how this hymn was written, and listen to a piano version of it here.

My Sister, My Best Friend

My sister and me, taken in 2003.

A sister is a forever friend.

~Author Unknown

Sweet is the voice of a sister in the season of sorrow.

~Benjamin Disraeli

A sister is a little bit of childhood that can never be lost.

~Marion C. Garretty

One of the greatest blessings I have is the love of a sister.

She was born only one and a half years after me, so we practically grew up together.

There are many beautiful memories that I have in my heart about her.

We share the same upbringing, went to the same school, spent twenty five years of our lives together in the same home.

The memories I have in my heart can never really be described. Memories of our early growing up years, childhood adventures, teenage experiences, our Christmases, school days, summer vacations, birthdays, graduations, career life, wedding days, having children of our own...the warmth of our parents' love for us, our journey together as a family.

Later on, the illness of our mother, her death, then many years later, the illness of our father... and his passing away.


Someone once said that "Sisters are different flowers from the same garden."

How true this is. Though we come from the same garden, we are not at all the same.

My sister is more energetic, I am more laid back.

She is a doer, I'm a thinker.

She's practical, I tend to be more emotional.

She is good at multi-tasking, I prefer to do things one at a time.



But underneath these differences, we feel the same way about many things.

We both believe in family, in being willing to sacrifice, to do hard things, and in doing our best as much as possible.

We have seen how our parents gave us the best years of their lives, and we have done the same for our children, equipping them to move on in life by showing them love in action.

The truth is, I have a great admiration for my sister. She has reached great heights in her career. Refusing to settle for second best, she had the guts to try new things, and has tasted success on many fronts.

Though we have lived apart from each other for 31 years already, our hearts have grown closer to each other through the years.

My sister has rejoiced with me in my successes, and has wept with me in my sorrows. She has been a pillar of strength during the difficult seasons of my life.

She always thinks of me and my family, never failing to remember our birthdays, always willing to extend a helping hand. She has been very generous to me. At a time of great need, she has really given me more than what I expected.

She also loves sending me beautiful things from America - things for my home like bedsheets, towels, rugs and mats, special foodstuff, clothes, vitamins, kitchen gadgets, books, stationery, shoes, bath and body things...

When my MP3 player was stolen the year we were in Chiang Mai, she sent me the latest iPod model. When she found out it was very cold in Thailand, she sent us a box of winter clothing.

Oh, I could never really enumerate the kind of things she has given us.

Because I know the bottom line is not the tangible things, what matters more is the love, the kindness, the thoughtfulness.

We have also gone through times of misunderstanding and being hurt and offended...but in the end, love was more powerful, and we have learned to forgive each other, and to move on in our relationship, to the praise and glory of our God.


My sister, you are beautiful! Here are some precious pictures of you and me:

My younger sister and me, together with Mama and Papa.

In Mama's arms!

Always smiling!


Such a tender moment, my sister with Mama.



My sister with Papa on her Kindergarten graduation.



A lovely studio shot.


I was 11 in this picture, and my sister was 10.




My sister and me as young teeners.

In her early 40's, during one of her trips to Germany.

At the peak of her career, at 40.

My sister and me, in Times Square, NY City, in 2003.

A recent picture of my sister, in Chicago.

In her 50's, my sister in Tarrytown.

Today, my dearest sister, as you celebrate another birthday, I just want to let you know that I love you very much, and I appreciate having you as my sister, the only one I have.

You are definitely God's gift to me. I am very proud of you, and grateful to God for having given me a sister like you. Many times, He has used you to be His channel of blessing in my life. There are not enough words to tell you how much you are appreciated for all the generosity and care and kindness you have shown.

May God draw you closer to His heart as you celebrate another year of your life. May God HImself be your reward, and grant You the desires of Your heart, as you hunger and thirst for more of Him.

Room Enough

A Clearing in the Forest


The pangs of death surrounded me,
And the floods of ungodliness made me afraid...

He sent from above, He took me;
He drew me out of many waters...

He delivered me from my strong enemy,
From those who hated me
For they were too strong for me.

They confronted me in the days of my calamity
But the Lord was my support.

He also brought me out into a broad place;
He delivered me because He delighted in me.

- Psalm 18:4, 16-19

Typhoon Ketsana (locally known as tropical strom Ondoy) hit Metro Manila and surrounding regions two weeks ago, leaving unbelievable destruction and devastation in its path after 16 hours of unrelenting rain.

A week later, super typhoon Parma (locally named Pepeng) struck our northern provinces, and stayed for ten days. Just imagine what ten days of strong winds and non-stop rains can do.

This time, not only was there more widespread flooding, there were also deadly mudslides across this mountainous area of our islands.

The death toll rising by the hour.

Untold damage to infrastructure and crops.

Personal loss.

Once thriving businesses...grim hopes and slim chances of being recovered.

Thousands of flood victims living like refugees in evacuation centers, waiting for relief goods to reach them amid news that flood waters in many parts will not recede until the end of this year.

Fear, hopelessness and despair etched on their faces.


As I boarded my 9 a.m. flight to Bacolod City yesterday, Typhoon Parma still had not left our country.

Only this morning, ten days after it struck, was the typhoon reported to be finally on its way out of our country.

But leaving in its wake,

people grieving over the death of loved ones,

homes lost, destroyed, or filled with debris and mud,

mountains of garbage still waiting to be collected,

sickness breaking out in many quarters,

conflicting ideas and debates among city engineers on how to clean up the mess and open up additional flood spillways,

finger pointing and blame shifting among politicians...


Even our province, located in the middle part of the country, was not spared from the effects of the recent typhoons. There was also flooding in several coastal areas.



To be honest, I arrived in Bacolod City yesterday with a heavy heart. To intercede for our nation is God's call upon my life, so it is but natural that I carry the pain of my fellow countrymen, trying to feel what they are going through.


Watching the news on television as the events unfold before my tear-filled eyes, I had several questions for God on my heart:

Where are You in all these, Lord?

What is Your purpose in all these, dear God?


In the midst of so much devastation and loss, I can't help but wonder how much my puny efforts can really contribute. Where do I even begin to pray?

I shudder as I realize how helpless I really am.

A bag of groceries, a blanket, several bottles of water, a loaf of bread. Thousands of hands reaching out.

An angry mob rushing toward the approaching van loaded with relief goods. It is not enough. It never will be.

That's how desperate the situation can get.

Sometimes I can't help feeling that whatever anyone does to help is a feeble, pitiful attempt to touch their pain.

Wounds run deep. It would be sheer arrogance for one to say he understands.



No one, absolutely no one can fathom the depths of their hearts.

No one... except God.

So, rather than be overwhelmed by a deep sense of helplessness, I know one must hold on to hope.

It's the only way for recovery to begin, even in my own heart.

I must choose to hang on, and step out in faith, believing that out of death comes life, even if at the moment hope is but a mere glimmer, and faith is smaller than a mustard seed.


Yes, I must be the one to stand in the gap, and believe for my fellow Filipinos, many of whom do not have the strength to carry on, let alone muster enough faith to see beyond their present sufferings.


A mayor is moved to tears at the sight of a tiny baby's body recovered from the mudslides in Pangasinan. You see the hollow look in the eyes of families huddled together in front of an ugly gaping sinkhole where their homes once stood. You look at farmers standing before ruined ricefields buried under thick mud and silt, their months of labor now all amounting to nothing.

The same story is repeated in thousands of lives.

I have my questions, so do they.

There are no easy answers at a time like this, I know.



But these past days I have been reminded of the last day of our retreat in Baguio City.

Just over a month ago five of my friends and I were in that city, spending time with God, seeking His face, longing to hear a timely word from Him for the next leg of our personal journeys. In fact I have written about that time in my early September blog posts.

As of this writing, Baguio City is isolated from the rest of the country. All the mountain roads leading to that lovely mountain city have been rendered impassable by super typhoon Parma.

But, somehow, all of us who heard from God during the days that we were there last month have received a fresh touch from Him. How lovingly God had taken notice of our individual needs. Little did we know then that just a few weeks after, we would be hanging on to the words of life that He had spoken into our hearts!


Our devotional that morning was from Genesis 26. The story is about Isaac digging again the wells that his father Abraham had dug. There was strife and contention over the wells.

Finally a third well is dug, and there was no quarrel over it. So he calls its name Rehoboth, saying,

For now the LORD has made room for us, and we shall be fruitful in the land.

Rehoboth literally means spaciousness, or room enough.

It also means a broad place.


God spoke to our hearts that morning:

Leave the place of strife, or contention.

Refuse to be bound. Seek My kingdom, and My righteousness.

Drink from the well of broad places. There is room enough in the presence of your God.

Find grace, find mercy, open your heart to the endless possibilities of My goodness and My love.


God is inviting us to experience the nearness of His heart where there is space and freedom to grow, so that together with the psalmist we can declare,

You enlarged my path under me, so my feet did not slip (Psalm 18:36).


Just as Abraham received from God the promise of Canaan land after he separated from his nephew Lot, so are we to separate from what hinders and defiles, if we truly desire to obtain our inheritance in Him!

And the LORD said to Abram, after Lot had separated from him: “Lift your eyes now and look from the place where you are—northward, southward, eastward, and westward; for all the land which you see I give to you and your descendants forever." (Genesis 13:14)

God wants to draw us near, where we are unhindered, where we have room enough to discover more of Him, more of how He sees us, more of what He wants to do in our lives.

But this requires a pure heart... brokenness... a willingness to be set apart.



The flood in Noah's Day was a symbol of purging, and cleansing.

So it is today.

Behold, God makes all things new.

There have been many prophetic words spoken over our nation. God will come in righteousness. But before that happens, cleansing needs to take place at a deep level in the heart of our nation.

This is a time of separation, of the axe being laid at the root. Every tree that does not bear fruit needs to be cut down.


Not just for this country, but wherever there is a shaking, a sifting. At the same time that the typhoons came to our country, earthquakes were happening in other places.

God is exposing the false, removing faulty foundations, preparing the world for His coming.

God is seeking the fruit.


God knows what He is doing. I will wait for His timetable, I will wait for His deliverance.


In the words of David S. Lampel,

What good is there in calling upon a God who does only our bidding? That would not be a god, but a marionette.

The truth of living is found in the waiting, in the dependency, in the strong arm that ultimately reaches down into our abyss and draws us up to safety.

Aspects, Issue # 141

I begin to sense peace and comfort as God continues to speak to my heart.

You are not the Savior of your nation. I am...

Enter the broad places that I am opening up before you.

When you see these things happening, look up, for your salvation is near.


This is my heart's response: Maranatha! Come, Lord Jesus, come!

But as for me, my prayer is to You, O Lord,
at an acceptable time;

O God, in the greatness of Your lovingkindness,
Answer me with Your saving truth.

Deliver me from the mire
and do not let me sink;

May I be delivered from my foes
and from the deep waters.

May the flood of water not overflow me
Nor the deep swallow me up,
Nor the pit shut its mouth on me.

- Psalm 69:13-15

Call Favor Home

Misty Morning

photo credit

For the LORD God is a sun and shield,

He bestows favor and honor.

no good thing does the LORD withhold

from those who walk uprightly.

O LORD of hosts,

blessed is the man who trusts in Thee!

- Psalm 84:11, 12



For surely, O LORD, You bless the righteous;
You surround them with Your favor as with a shield.

-Psalm 5:12



And we know that in all things
God works for the good of those who love Him,
who have been the called according to His purpose.

- Romans 8:28



...the God who gives life to the dead
and calls things that are not as though they were.

Romans 4:17



...to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor
and the day of vengeance of our God.

Isaiah 61:2

I have been feeling the weight of the recent events in my family life, and in the devastation of the northern provinces of our country, including Metro Manila. Many families have lost not only homes, but loved ones as well. Tears would well up in my eyes each time I watched the news updates.

The difficult and painful task of rebuilding our nation lies ahead.

The difficult and painful task of rebuilding Obedient One's confidence also lies ahead.

And what about my own life, did I not need to rebuild it, too?



I woke up Friday morning asking God to touch me afresh.

Gently, a familiar song began to play in my heart. It was the song Through It All.

I took out my iPod, and listened to the song many times over, suddenly feeling so overwhelmed by the loving presence of God.

God began speaking to me about the cloud of favor that surrounds my life. Never doubt, my dear child. I heard His reassuring voice.

Favor is what I have as His child. Never have the words of Psalm 5:12 been such a comfort to my heavy heart.

For surely you bless the righteous, you surround them with Your favor as a shield.

I let the words sink in, even as the tears kept flowing from my eyes.

The LORD God is a sun and shield... He bestows favor and honor.

To be favored means to be "regarded or treated with favor, to be provided with advantages, to be specifically privileged."

Many years ago, a close friend of the family, Jeff Littleton, had prayed for me. He said that the cloud of God's favor was upon me. He saw this cloud settle around me...

In many recurring dreams, I would see a cloud settle upon my home, and a still small voice has often spoken, saying, "That's the cloud of My favor."

I had forgotten.

Until this morning, when I picked up Kate McVeigh's book entitled The Blessing of Favor... and God allowed me to remember the promise of His favor in my life.

I had bought this book for Obedient One months ago. When I saw it at her bedside table, I picked it up and slowly leafed through the pages.


Expect favor.

Call favor home. Call the favor of God to operate in your life. Call your blessings home. Call whatever you need --your money or healing--home.

If you will call those things which be not as though they were, you will have those things that you call for.


I was beginning to be defeated. And weighed down. And was getting weary in the battle.

But He heard my cry.

The word "call" in the Greek literally means "to...summon." When we start calling for the favor of God, it has to show up.

It works the same in every area of your life. If you start calling for healing, healing has to come. If you call your body strong, it will become strong.



Not only were these the words of God that became so real to me. On Sunday morning, in church, guess what was one of the songs that were sung? This very song.

I'm carried on everlasting arms...You'll never let me go...through it all.


I couldn't keep the tears from falling. My Father was ministering to me, letting me feel His favor around me, around my daughter, around my fellow Filipinos who were going through such a painful time...He let me feel His favor like a shield.

The words of Pastor Edgar spoke to our hearts. "There's perfect peace and calm in the eye of the storm," he said. "And the eye of the storm is where Jesus is."

Many in the congregation that Sunday had lost all they had. Tears were falling.

"Maybe you are asking now why the floods came to our lives, " he said.

"Beloved brothers and sisters, the floods have come for only one reason."

"To bring us to higher grounds."

How true it was. Maybe the literal floods did not reach my life. But I was feeling swamped.

How timely the words were...the Bible verses, Kate's book, Pastor Edgar's encouraging message, the song!

God used these all to speak comfort and peace to my heart.


Bring me to higher grounds, dear Father. This is my prayer, the cry of my heart. Thank You that You are the God of my seasons. You'll never let me go, through it all!



Through It All
Hillsong

You are forever in my life
You see me through the seasons
Cover me with Your hand
And lead me in Your righteousness

And I look to You
And I wait on You

I'll sing to You Lord
A hymn of Love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
Through it all

You are forever in my life
You see me through the seasons
Cover me with Your hand
And lead me in Your righteousness

And I look to You
And I wait on You

I'll sing to You Lord
A hymn of Love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go

I'll sing to You Lord
A hymn of Love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
Through it all