photo credit
...to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,
and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the LORD
for the display of his splendor.
- Isaiah 61:2-3
The ten-day Elijah House School of Prayer Ministry ended last Friday.
There were mixed feelings inside of me during the closing session. Because the school had been such a life-giving experience for me, I wished the school did not have to end so soon.
There were thirteen of us serving in various ministries from different parts of the Philippines, and the bond of love that was formed, especially within our small groups, was just so real.
During the ten days we went through 24 video lessons from seasoned prayer ministers, men and women who obviously have a close relationship with God and know what they are talking about. Most, if not all of them shared a little about their brokenness, how Jesus met them at their point of need, and turned their lives around. They shared the lessons they have learned and how these have enabled them to keep walking in their healing.
Then at the end of each day we would meet in small groups where ministry with a trained Elijah House prayer minister was available to anyone who had need.
Understandably the bond of love formed among all of us was quite strong.
The video teaching was modeled out in real life by the six facilitators who conducted the school. We were able to listen to their own stories of their healing journey - accounts of bitterness, emotional wounding, sexual molestation, parental neglect, etc. - and we saw for ourselves how God had broken through their protective mechanisms and brought them to the place where their inner wounds were washed, and they were able to trust again. They modeled for us gentleness, acceptance, affirmation, and love.
There was so much life poured into us, I saw before my own eyes how my schoolmates, including me, were transformed physically, in just a period of two weeks. On the last day of the school our faces were soft, and glowing!
Why did I go to Elijah House?
I heard of Elijah House years ago but never really planned to attend it. Because I was actively involved in Family Foundations, serving as a seminar coordinator and small groups facilitator, and having received intensive training as well as on-going hands-on experience, I just thought that I was doing well.
Sometime in April, however, a friend shared with me how her daughter was healed of an emotional condition that she had been undergoing for many years. The healing came after she attended a "Recovery from Trauma" seminar offered by Elijah House.
This sparked an interest in me because I have also been praying for a dear friend who has been in and out of depression, such a painful condition to be in for the past twenty-five years or so.
I planned to attend it to gain more skills and understanding that will enable me to minister more effectively to others.
As early as April this year, when I found out that an Elijah House Basic 1 school was being offered in Manila sometime in August, I began asking God to give me confirmation if this was part of His plan for me.
By the time August came, one thing was very clear to me.
I was to attend this school. But not for others. Not to gain more skills. Not to gain more knowledge.
God was sending me to Elijah House...for myself.
In a sense it was so liberating to realize that. From Day One, I knew I was in this school because God was going to do something new in my life, and He was going to speak things I needed to hear.
At the very start of the school, we went through the Biblical Basis of the Elijah House Ministry, the "philosophy" behind it, so to speak.
Hearing what John Sandford had to say at the outset was indeed an eye-opener for me:
It is easy for most of us to believe that that's all it takes.
Or worse, that we don't need to go back to the past because Jesus has already accomplished all the healing we need on the cross.
But the truth is that there are hardened layers underneath where the healing waters of Jesus have not reached, because they are protected by our own defense mechanisms, or the emotional wounds are too painful there is a powerful denial and stuffing system guarding those layers.
The school began each day with an extended period of worship. After lunch each day we would have almost one hour of just sitting quietly while we allowed the Lord's presence to soften our hearts by listening to beautiful worship music and the facilitators would go around praying for each one of us, speaking words of affirmation over us, or whatever the Lord was impressing on them at that time.
It was a beautiful and gentle way of letting God's healing waters begin to soften or even crack up the hardened layers surrounding our hearts.
Then the teaching was ALWAYS based on God's word...this gave us such a security to know that it was not from a human perspective, but from a Biblical one, that the teachers were speaking.
And we all know that verse in Scripture, in Hebrews 4:12-13 that says that
I just did not want to miss the opportunity for me to respond to the hour of God's visitation upon my life.
I prayed to Him to do with me as He pleased in the healing season I was in.
And He did.
God opened my eyes to areas in my life where I had carried false burdens, and lived under the weight of false guilt and self blame. I had a negative judgment of myself because of my desire to "be perfect".
All along I knew I was a recovering perfectionist, but there were hidden pockets in my life that the wounding of the past had not yet been healed. And so the Lord was able to bring that up to light, and I was able to receive ministry for it.
I knew I was sensitive to the needs of others, but I realized that I had become a false burden bearer, carrying weights that God never intended me to.
Self-righteousness and subtle spiritual pride were also some of the deep struggles of my life.
I must confess that I tend to be impatient of others who seem unable to get out of their woundedness, those who seem to have made an idol out of their victimization... holding on to their pain to the point that it has become their identity!
To be honest, I cannot stand people who keep getting stuck in their unwise choices. Of course, I do not show this, because these prideful attitudes are effectively hidden inside.
It was just so freeing to be healed of this. As I repented, and asked God to set me free, I released all those things that had weighed me down.
God's forgiveness and blessings of His unconditional love and acceptance were spoken over me.
God spoke to me that I was entering into my season of rest, and so much hope arose in my heart as a result.
There are many other things that cannot be shared openly on the web, but this is just a glimpse that I am allowing my readers to have into the very precious experience that I had at Elijah House the past days.
There will be an Elijah House Level Two School this October, and I also have a desire to go through it. Already I am asking God for the confirmation of this desire, as well as the needed provisions for it.
My prayer:
Father, I thank You for the time You allowed me to have at the Elijah House school. I know that the school was just a venue You chose to touch me at a deeper level, and bring freedom to yet another layer of my life.
How much I appreciate what You have done for me, calling me, and speaking to me how much You care. That I am Your treasured one, that You are pouring so much HOPE into my heart for the next level of my life.
I am walking with You in this, dear God. I am holding on to You. It is a new level, a new awareness, and I just cannot thank You enough. But thank You!
I am looking forward to an activation of more gifts and opportunities to know You, to see You at work... and more open doors and kingdom connections... for Your glory!
Below are some pictures I took of the school facilitators and schoolmates:
Char
She really modeled genuine servanthood for us. She was my small group facilitator, and she took over as the school moderator on the second week. She really did a good "job."
Beckie
Her very presence affirmed me...even without saying anything, her spirit had such a healing effect on me. She modeled true humility for me.
Beckie and Virmy
Virmy is the head of Elijah House, Philippines. She was with us on the last day of the school. Her presence has such gentle authority. When she prayed for me during the soaking time in God's presence, the powerful presence of the Holy Spirit that came. She had the right words to say, even though she did not really know me that well. Yesterday we were able to spend some time together at the Shangri-la Mall, and we had a blessed time together. I praise God for Virmy!
Ria
...is shown here cutting the boards for our group's cardboard testimonies. She really has such a sweet spirit!
Tanya
...is shown here helping Ria cut up the boards, that's why they were both on the floor when I took these pictures. Tanya has such an eager and keen spirit to move on!
Gloria
...is 69, and was the oldest participant in the school. She also has a Ph.D. and came to the school "ready to fight." But God met her, and opened up her mind. And her mental reservations and strongholds came tumbling down.
Petra
...is from Germany but has been in a ministry for the urban poor for the last twenty years! She has such a perceptive spirit!
Suzzhette
...is such a friendly woman, with such a beautiful smile, and I really appreciated getting to meet her in the school.
Jamie
...is not our schoolmate, but her mom, Rebbie, was. And she came to attend her mom's graduation. Her mom Rebbie and I are good friends (sorry, I was not able to take a picture of Rebbie).
me, Ria, Gloria, Tanya, and Petra
...were all together in the small group. We really bonded well.
This sparked an interest in me because I have also been praying for a dear friend who has been in and out of depression, such a painful condition to be in for the past twenty-five years or so.
I planned to attend it to gain more skills and understanding that will enable me to minister more effectively to others.
As early as April this year, when I found out that an Elijah House Basic 1 school was being offered in Manila sometime in August, I began asking God to give me confirmation if this was part of His plan for me.
By the time August came, one thing was very clear to me.
I was to attend this school. But not for others. Not to gain more skills. Not to gain more knowledge.
God was sending me to Elijah House...for myself.
In a sense it was so liberating to realize that. From Day One, I knew I was in this school because God was going to do something new in my life, and He was going to speak things I needed to hear.
At the very start of the school, we went through the Biblical Basis of the Elijah House Ministry, the "philosophy" behind it, so to speak.
Hearing what John Sandford had to say at the outset was indeed an eye-opener for me:
"Inner healing" is a misnomer and not a term of our choosing.
Healing seems to imply that something is broken so we need to repair it.
But God does not intend to fix us--to put new patches on old garments.
He means to slay us on His cross and raise us anew in Him. As prayer ministers, this calls us to constant death of "self" on the cross in order that we not lay practiced programs on people, but attempt to allow the Holy Spirit to write His lessons in the hearts of His children.
He is not only putting His laws in our minds, but He is also writing them deep in our hearts.
Christian healing comes, not by making something broken good enough to work, but by freeing us from the power of that broken thing so that it can no longer rule us, and by teaching us to trust God's righteousness to shine in and through that very thing.
- John Sandford
We are all in various stages of being sanctified and transformed into the likeness of Jesus Christ. The topmost layers are the easiest to recognize and submit to His healing touch.It is easy for most of us to believe that that's all it takes.
Or worse, that we don't need to go back to the past because Jesus has already accomplished all the healing we need on the cross.
But the truth is that there are hardened layers underneath where the healing waters of Jesus have not reached, because they are protected by our own defense mechanisms, or the emotional wounds are too painful there is a powerful denial and stuffing system guarding those layers.
The school began each day with an extended period of worship. After lunch each day we would have almost one hour of just sitting quietly while we allowed the Lord's presence to soften our hearts by listening to beautiful worship music and the facilitators would go around praying for each one of us, speaking words of affirmation over us, or whatever the Lord was impressing on them at that time.
It was a beautiful and gentle way of letting God's healing waters begin to soften or even crack up the hardened layers surrounding our hearts.
Then the teaching was ALWAYS based on God's word...this gave us such a security to know that it was not from a human perspective, but from a Biblical one, that the teachers were speaking.
And we all know that verse in Scripture, in Hebrews 4:12-13 that says that
...the Word of God is living and active
sharper than a double edged sword,
piercing even to the division of soul and spirit,
and of joints and marrow,
and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents
of the heart.
And there is no creature hidden from His sight,
but all things are naked and open to the eyes
of Him to whom we must give account.
sharper than a double edged sword,
piercing even to the division of soul and spirit,
and of joints and marrow,
and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents
of the heart.
And there is no creature hidden from His sight,
but all things are naked and open to the eyes
of Him to whom we must give account.
I just did not want to miss the opportunity for me to respond to the hour of God's visitation upon my life.
I prayed to Him to do with me as He pleased in the healing season I was in.
And He did.
God opened my eyes to areas in my life where I had carried false burdens, and lived under the weight of false guilt and self blame. I had a negative judgment of myself because of my desire to "be perfect".
All along I knew I was a recovering perfectionist, but there were hidden pockets in my life that the wounding of the past had not yet been healed. And so the Lord was able to bring that up to light, and I was able to receive ministry for it.
I knew I was sensitive to the needs of others, but I realized that I had become a false burden bearer, carrying weights that God never intended me to.
Self-righteousness and subtle spiritual pride were also some of the deep struggles of my life.
I must confess that I tend to be impatient of others who seem unable to get out of their woundedness, those who seem to have made an idol out of their victimization... holding on to their pain to the point that it has become their identity!
To be honest, I cannot stand people who keep getting stuck in their unwise choices. Of course, I do not show this, because these prideful attitudes are effectively hidden inside.
It was just so freeing to be healed of this. As I repented, and asked God to set me free, I released all those things that had weighed me down.
God's forgiveness and blessings of His unconditional love and acceptance were spoken over me.
God spoke to me that I was entering into my season of rest, and so much hope arose in my heart as a result.
There are many other things that cannot be shared openly on the web, but this is just a glimpse that I am allowing my readers to have into the very precious experience that I had at Elijah House the past days.
There will be an Elijah House Level Two School this October, and I also have a desire to go through it. Already I am asking God for the confirmation of this desire, as well as the needed provisions for it.
My prayer:
Father, I thank You for the time You allowed me to have at the Elijah House school. I know that the school was just a venue You chose to touch me at a deeper level, and bring freedom to yet another layer of my life.
How much I appreciate what You have done for me, calling me, and speaking to me how much You care. That I am Your treasured one, that You are pouring so much HOPE into my heart for the next level of my life.
I am walking with You in this, dear God. I am holding on to You. It is a new level, a new awareness, and I just cannot thank You enough. But thank You!
I am looking forward to an activation of more gifts and opportunities to know You, to see You at work... and more open doors and kingdom connections... for Your glory!
Below are some pictures I took of the school facilitators and schoolmates:
Some of the school facilitators
CharShe really modeled genuine servanthood for us. She was my small group facilitator, and she took over as the school moderator on the second week. She really did a good "job."
BeckieHer very presence affirmed me...even without saying anything, her spirit had such a healing effect on me. She modeled true humility for me.
Beckie and VirmyVirmy is the head of Elijah House, Philippines. She was with us on the last day of the school. Her presence has such gentle authority. When she prayed for me during the soaking time in God's presence, the powerful presence of the Holy Spirit that came. She had the right words to say, even though she did not really know me that well. Yesterday we were able to spend some time together at the Shangri-la Mall, and we had a blessed time together. I praise God for Virmy!
Some of my schoolmates:
Ria...is shown here cutting the boards for our group's cardboard testimonies. She really has such a sweet spirit!
Tanya...is shown here helping Ria cut up the boards, that's why they were both on the floor when I took these pictures. Tanya has such an eager and keen spirit to move on!
Gloria...is 69, and was the oldest participant in the school. She also has a Ph.D. and came to the school "ready to fight." But God met her, and opened up her mind. And her mental reservations and strongholds came tumbling down.
Petra...is from Germany but has been in a ministry for the urban poor for the last twenty years! She has such a perceptive spirit!
Suzzhette...is such a friendly woman, with such a beautiful smile, and I really appreciated getting to meet her in the school.
Jamie...is not our schoolmate, but her mom, Rebbie, was. And she came to attend her mom's graduation. Her mom Rebbie and I are good friends (sorry, I was not able to take a picture of Rebbie).
me, Ria, Gloria, Tanya, and Petra...were all together in the small group. We really bonded well.
21 comments:
Lidj, I was blessed to read about your experience at Elijah House. Every Christian needs such a time for healing and honesty before the Lord. I very much need it myself, and though I have never had an opportunity to be involved in a ministry like Elijah House, I daily seek God for His healing balm and transforming power. I cannot live without God's mercy in my life.
The needs of our souls are hard to understand, but I am so thankful to know the Healer, Who searches our hearts and knows the mind of the Spirit.
I love the word you shared about God's not fixing us and how it takes death of self. So true! And that is something we cannot do for ourselves. Our job is to yield to His voice and allow Him to work.
I must let my Father continue to soften my ground. In doing so, I can truly be moldable clay in His hands. Let it be, dear Lord!
Wonderful post! Much love to you this August weekend.
Andrea
Hi Lidj,
It's good to hear from you again and to hear of what's been going on in your life. This sounds like such a blessed experience. I like what you said about God not patching us up, but instead by making us new. The pictures show a bunch of beautiful new women!
Thankful for your honesty but I think all of us should evaluate our hearts daily and truly seek Him and let Him lead us in all of our ways.
We know that where the Spirit of the Lord, there is liberty. I'm glad that you had that liberating experience as you willingly followed what He wanted you to do.
Your spiritual growth always inspires me sister Lidj and despite the many miles between us, I'm grateful to have met you and feel that oneness that only comes from knowing Him. To God be the glory and I loved and prayed your prayer with you. God bless and protect you always. Praying that many more from our "kababayans" will come to know His love and grace. It's not about us. It's about Him. Love to you in Christ.
"Self-righteousness and subtle spiritual pride were also some of the deep struggles of my life." I understand and relate. I would love to have you over for tea and just share our common struggle and how God is transforming us.
I understand how not all things can be shared on your blog as well. I've been in a season of simplicity, study, solitude, silence, and surrender! Some of the deep things God is revealing to me are difficult to put into words or just to personal to publish for all the world to read. I'm working on a happy compromise. I'm glad you were able to do this as well.
I love the pictures of you and your group. They all look like they would quickly become kindred spirits.
One verse I've been meditating on a lot lately adequately fits your state:
You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock. Isaiah 26:3-4
Love,
Amy
Hello,
Interesting post.
This is the first I have heard of Elijah House and would like to know the following:
1) In your photos there are no men. How come? Is it just that women are more drawn to it?
2) You speak of Christian healing. How does this differ from other forms of healing eg Buddhist healing. People have been known to do amazing things through the power of faith but this is not always Christian faith or faith in a particular religion.
Congratulations for being concerned about other people and dedicating your life to them.
Take care.
Dear Lidj,
I am really happy for you,that you have had this wonderful time at the Elijah House Ministry.
I feel I could need at least a year in such a place. I am indeed an unfinished work under construction.
As I write the words Of Paul are coming to me, Phil 3:12Pressing on Toward the Goal
12Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."
I have come such a short way, using such a long time.
You've made me want and long for more.
Thank you ever so much for sharing.
Lidj, what a beautiful experience. Sometimes when I am learning, I think of how this would help a friend or loved one. But often God is wanting to do a work in us. And we need to be open to His working in us.
It sounds like He is doing a major work in you. I for one, am thankful that you are sharing it with us. I learn from you. YOu have such a tender heart and I love that. The more I read your blog, the more I learn and want to learn more. The Lord is good and He provides what we need and when we need it. Although I've read your blog long ago, it is now that I feel I need to read it more closely. I guess it's the place where I am in my walk right now and what I'm ready for.
Thank you for writing of your experiences and what God is teaching you. I love that it doesn't matter where we live, we can still come together on our blogs. The internet can be used for good and for God's purposes.
Blessings and love,
Debbie
Dear Purple Cow,
Thank you for your questions.
Elijah House is open to both men and women. It just so happened that in this particular school only women applied to enroll. Thirteen in all.
There are male facilitators as well. The head facilitator was Ed Alvarez, a male, and there were two others. I just did not have the chance to take photos of them. After a while I decided to put my camera away as there were many other cameras clicking away.
I have no doubt that there is healing available outside the Christian faith. Forgive me though that I cannot tell you how Christian healing differs from other forms of healing. All I know is that my growth and journey to maturation is centered in the Christian God whom I have personally experienced. I talk about it a lot on my blog because that is my own personal experience, and this blog is simply a record of my own healing journey. If others will also benefit from the words I write, that will be more than I have asked for.
Thank you for your interest.
Love
Lidj
Hello Lidj, All of the ladies in the photos look so happy and blessed..My daughter has attended Elijah House here in Queensland, its about a 30min drive from her home. For me it is much much further..so I have never been..but she has been very blessed. I have many of the DVD's and she recommended I get and watch them. I have been aware of John and Paula Snadfor for years. I read their book, "Healing of the Innerman" long ago... So sad Paula is no longer able to be with John. I love them.
God bless you heaps dear sister.
Hugs Crystal xxx
Oh how wonderfully inspiring was this post--"He means to slay us on His cross an raise us anew in Him". We get so busy in doing, in helping others that it's hard to just find the time to "stop" and let Him make our hearts tender so He can help us die to self and reach a closer walk with Him. Thanking God for His work in your life. With much love.
Lidj, seldom can I spend so much time reading a post. but this of yours, I really devoured, it is so fascination to read of your growth and that of others.
Thank you for sharing so much detail of your experiences with us. It was well worth the time spent here. I try to read and understand everything you write.
You are so much blest, woman, and your light shines brightly.
Lidj
I have awaited this report - this intimate sharing...ever since you said that you were going! My prayers were with you from day one. Oh how I am so blessed by your sharing here. Your healing blesses my own spirit and puts a song in my heart. I am dancing with celebratory heights for God's goodness and gentleness to you in this season of your life.
Reading your gently washed words of life and restoration was such a reminder of my own healing. I hear and feel the transformation in your spirit.
I loved the syllabus - and the blog entry for Elijah house. Glad to have their blog site too.
We had a teacher from the Elijah House in England at the 'Hope for Tomorrow' healing conference. He was sooooo great. I have his book on healing.
I'm excited to walk this new path with you...I have bathed my spirit tonight with His love through your music - your testimony - and revisited memories of my own deliverance and healing.
God bless you as He remains FAITHFUL to bring to completion the great mission He has begun in you!
Hugs,
Patrina <")>><
Thank you so much for your response and visit to my blog also. I am honoured you foundthe time.
Despite being a skeptic I find faith to be a powerful force. It matters to me to get to its roots, though I know that what matters more is what it does and how to channel it rather than discovering where all this goodness comes from.
Take care, be well.
"God opened my eyes to areas in my life where I had carried false burdens, and lived under the weight of false guilt and self blame. I had a negative judgment of myself because of my desire to "be perfect"."
So interesting, Lidj, that God has been doing some work in me in this area, just this past week...
Thank you for sharing about healing. I so need it.
Saw the horrible hostage news in Manila. Pray you and all your loved ones were safe. Feel terrible abou t the loss of lives.
Ah Lidj, so good to have you back my friend! It sounds like such a captivating experience and one of learning and growth. I am so happy your experience was so blessed, that truly must be the Lord's doing!
God bless and have a wonderful day!
Love Colleen
So glad to see you are back in the blog world!
After reading your comment on my "Goin' Christian" post..... it brought such a warm feeling as well as tears to me. Lidj, you are a very special person.... you have no idea what you are sending to me across the miles.
Thank you for the support and kindness!
Thank you for the compliments. : )
Peace&Love,
Lis
Hey Lidj, what a beautiful and inspiring post...Your life shines....you shine and I'm so grateful I connected with you.
Hi Lidj,
Thank you and I love you. My sister said to me the other day, "Sandy, there's something special about that blog "Crown of Beauty". My sister has the gift of prophecy. I have felt your prayers. Sandy:O)
God touched some of those deep, hidden wounds in MY heart through your selective words here. I could identify with most all of the honest descriptions of your inner person.
Our interior pilgrimages seem to parallel each other quite remarkably.
I love you, Lidj. I know our Father will give you clear confirmation re. Elijah House II.
"He means to slay us on His cross and raise us anew in Him" - yes - not a patch-work healing but raising us anew! That is liberating! I think it is sometimes difficult to wrap our minds around God's deliverance, not just the breaking down of walls not built by God, but the rebuilding, totally, wholly anew. God spent a season, a painful season of loss over a decade ago, showing me that He did not mean for me to be a crippled Christian, praying for wholeness for my children - that by providing them with loving parents, a loving Christian household, no scars of being the rejected children through divorce. Yes, I want my children whole - but God showed me He would raise me up anew, whole, unscarred - not a crippled Christian carrying a burden I was never intended to carry.
What a beautiful retreat! Soaking! I like the sound of that! My oldest son talks about soaking up God, just sitting, soaking - then I get the Mary/Martha complex. Yes, I just need to soak in God's spirit!
Your post is like a delicious meal with wonderful side-dishes! Be blessed Lidj!
Maryleigh
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