A Legacy of Kindness

Birds eating leftover breakfast

at the Verandah, Baguio Country Club

May 30, 2015

... do you think lightly of the riches 
of His kindness and tolerance and patience,
not knowing that the kindness of God
leads you to repentance?
- Romans 2:4

But the fruit of the Spirit is 
love, joy, peace,
patience, kindness, goodness,
faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
Against such things there is no law.
- Galatians 5:22-23

God is unfathomable, but He is approachable.

And of His multi-faceted nature, He reveals some to you and me on a personal basis.

He is a God who allows Himself to be known.

We can ask God to reveal who He is to us, and when He does, that becomes our access point into His presence.

What touches me the most about God is that He is consistently good. His goodness is the basis for all He does.

When Moses asked God to show him His glory, God replied by saying, "I will cause all My goodness to pass before you..."

Yes, God's heart is filled with goodness... and this is seen in His acts of kindness toward His creation.

Father God does not hide His goodness from us; in fact, it is His goodness that softens our hearts to seek Him.

After Adam and Eve messed up His beautiful plans, He was ready with a plan rescue. He didn't have to do that... but He did.

He causes rain to fall on the just and the unjust...

If He feeds the birds of the air, will He not also give us the things we need, we who are far more valuable than the sparrows!



Today I am meditating on the fruit of the Spirit passage in Galatians 5:22-23.

When I was a young Christian believer as a university freshman, I could not understand why this passage listed the nine qualities as one "fruit." I couldn't get my mind off what our Bible teacher said: "These nine qualities is a portrait of Jesus Christ."

There is only one spiritual fruit - these nine qualities are segments or facets of that one fruit.

My mind was just blown away to realize that the Spirit so desires to grow that very fruit in each one of us.

I could never grow this fruit on my own. Self-effort has nothing to do with it. Only by abiding... being connected... being intimate with God... being obedient to Him... can the fruit be given the right environment for growth.

My ongoing desire is to have all these nine segments of the fruit of the Spirit growing in my heart.



Today, my granddaughter Peaceful One turns four months old.

This month, kindness is  facet of the fruit that I am asking God to develop in her.

In our world today, kindness is no longer a common quality. People can pretend to be kind for ulterior motives and hidden agenda, but genuine kindness, coming from a heart of goodness, is not so easily found.

We are confronted today by mudslinging in the entertainment world, as well as in politics, even in sports. In the name of religion, helpless individuals are being beheaded.

This world is starving for true kindness, acts of mercy and grace offered to another without expecting anything in return.

This seems to be my favorite line these days... its own reward... and it applies so beautifully to kindness as well.

Being kind is its own reward.

Being kind to another person for no hidden motives, and not out of pretense, is its own reward. We give life, and we receive life in return.

Kindness is a life-giving act.

Graham Cooke has often said that God is the kindest Person he has ever known. I definitely agree with him.

Kindness is not just a sweet, gentle disposition... it is very much an action-filled concept.

Kindness translates concern to actual deeds, deeds that convey a message to the other person that he or she has value and worth in your eyes and is worth your attention.

Genuine kindness to another person means that I am considerate of his needs, aware of his feelings, compassionate toward his circumstances, his shortcomings, his inadequacies... and I offer myself to him or her in an area of need, without expecting to be thanked, acknowledged, or even repaid.

True kindness is being willing to be interrupted or inconvenienced.

So much more. Several pages would not be enough to talk about true, spiritual kindness.

But as I meditated on this particular quality of our Lord Jesus Christ, I was struck by what this Bible passage says: it is the the kindness of God that leads us to repentance (Romans 2:4).

Looking inside my heart, I realize it is easier to be kind externally than internally. I must admit I am often unkind in my thoughts, judgments, and assessment of others. 

Yet, it is the kindness of God that leads me to repentance. 

How beautiful the heart and good intentions of God, that because of His kindness, showing me true value and worth, I have been led to bow at His feet, and offer my life to Him, to do with as He pleases.

Abba Father God has passed on to me a legacy of kindness.

Even as I write these words, I am also thankful for the legacy of kindness that has been passed on to me by my own dear earthly father, my Papa. 

I want to be like him. 

He was always kind... always kind. Of him it can be said, he didn't have one mean bone in him.

And this legacy of kindness I have received, from my Heavenly Father, and from my earthly father, I pass on to my dear grandchildren. 

As I pray for my dearest granddaughter Peaceful One, I ask Abba Father that she will truly experience the kindness of God in her life, that she, in turn will open the throne of her heart to Him.

Dearest granddaughter,

I pray that your heart will receive so much kindness 

from those around you,

causing the ground of your heart to be watered 

and drenched by kindness,

that kindness will be second nature to you, 

making the fruit of kindness evident in your life as you grow up.

You will be kind in your thoughts, 

in your perception of others, 

in your words, and in your deeds.

You will be a minister of kindness in the life of others, 

for the glory of God.

Much love always,

Nana

Lessons from a Bad Fall: Walking in the Opposite Spirit

"Praying Hands"

 by Richard Seah

photo source

Take your everyday, ordinary life...

and place it before God as an offering.

- Romans 12:1 (The Message)

For what will it profit a man
if he gains the whole world,
and loses his own soul?
- Mark 8:36




But because My servant Caleb has a different spirit
and follows Me wholeheartedly,
I will bring him into the land he went to,
and his descendants will inherit it.
- Numbers 14:24

On February 7, one week ago, this blog celebrated its fifth blog anniversary. The story of how this blog was born has been told in my earlier posts. It never ceases to amaze me how in just 400 entries, God has allowed me to put into words the story of my faith journey. There is something about writing that helps bring clarity and focus to the issues confronting us.

Henri Nouwen has put it so beautifully:

One of the most satisfying aspects of writing is that it can open in us deep wells of hidden treasures that are beautiful for us as well as for others to see.

More than anything else, this blog has been for me, in the words of  a dear blog friend, Denise (A Sacred Longing), "a place where the cry of my heart is given a voice."

In its initial stages, there was no clear cut agenda for this blog. My husband and I were living in Chiang Mai, Thailand when I began writing my earliest posts in 2008. How was I to know that several months later, my dear husband would go home to heaven, and that this blog would be the venue for me to process the gut-wrenching pain of losing a loved one? By putting my grief into words, this blog indeed became "a place where the cry of my heart was given a voice."

And yet my husband's death was never the main point. The main point has always been how God the heavenly Father is the Restorer, the Redeemer, the Sustainer, the Comforter, the Defender. He is the main topic of this blog.

The pain of death was just one of the many crossroads along the way. There was the more important business of picking up the pieces, and moving on.

Every moment life hands me several choices. As I have said many times before, choices are like seeds that we plant in the seedbed of opportunity. Will I remain in the wreckage, focusing on the loss, or will I get up, and walk down the road to recovery and restoration?

The answer was obvious. I didn't want to keep talking about the grief and the pain, but about how my heavenly Father sustained me, giving me hope and strength when the going was difficult.

I tell the story of my life as it unfolds, but the truth remains - God is the One writing my story.

photo source

On February 2, my daughter's maid Aiza slipped and fell from the ladder as she was cleaning the kitchen window. It was a peaceful Saturday afternoon, and I was in the porch, doing some mending. She came to me in tears and said, "I think I broke my wrist bone." It was a first time experience for both of us. Immediately I began thinking of what to do next... what hospital, what doctor, how much. But I also realized she needed comfort that very moment, and assurance that she was going to be taken care of. I held her hand, looked at her eyes, and assured her that I would take care of her. I also prayed a healing prayer for her, and thanked God for His loving protection over her.

In my heart I was asking God to guide me every step of the way - where to go, what to do. We took a taxi to go to the nearest hospital in the area. When the cab driver saw Aiza's arm, he asked what was wrong with it.

"I think the wrist bone might be broken after a fall."

Then he said, "Madam, maybe the medical center you are planning to go is not the place to get treatment for broken bones. When I broke my leg a few years ago, I got excellent treatment at the Orthopedic Hospital."

I never even knew there was such a place. So, I asked him to bring us there. It was right in the middle of Metro Manila, but it being a Saturday, traffic was light. We reached the place in less than thirty minutes.

How thankful I was that of all the cabs we could have taken, that particular taxi was sent by God just at the precise moment. After the initial interview with one of the many orthopedic doctors on duty at the emergency room, several x-rays taken, a gram stain analysis of a small wound, her left arm was put on a traction, then after about twenty minutes that seemed like forever, in a plaster cast... a repeat x-ray to make sure everything was right... an appointment card given for scheduled follow up. Four hours after we got there, we were on our way back home... my heart brimming over with thanksgiving that God had indeed heard my prayer.

But her fall required a readjustment for us... one that could take as long as six weeks to three months. We've been so used to having Aiza's efficient domestic help. With her left arm in a cast, her movement is very limited.

So during the last week of my stay in Manila, roles in our home were somewhat reversed. I became the servant to Aiza, where she used to be our servant girl. At the start, not being used to it, she refused to be served. But I had to keep assuring her that she is part of our household, and it was my responsibility to make sure that she got the proper medical attention for her arm. It was a lesson in humility for both of us.

There were many realizations during the days that followed. I discovered a well of joy bubbling up inside my heart. This was not an accident, it was a divine opportunity sent by the Lord. All my life as a wife and a mother, I had lived a life of service to my family. We live in a culture that relies heavily on hired domestic help, but my parents had trained my sister and me to be DIY, hands on persons, experts at home maintenance and running a household efficiently.

But in my earlier years of doing it, I was a perfectionist. Without my knowing it, in the name of efficiency and cleanliness, I was not much fun to live with. There were too many rules and demands.

One does not become a true servant overnight. It took years of shaping, and molding, and chiseling off the rough edges of my person. To be kind, compassionate, patient, and understanding when others don't do it my way. To have love as my motive... only love and nothing else.

Two songs kept repeating in my mind the whole week. One was "Brother Let Me Be Your Servant" written by Richard Gillard:

Brother let me be your servant
Let me be as Christ to you
Pray that I may have the grace
To let you be my servant, too

We are pilgrims on a journey
We are brothers on the road
We are here to help each other
Walk the mile and bear the load

I will hold the Christlight for you
In the night time of your fear
I will hold my hand out to you
Speak the peace you long to hear...

The other song was "Make Me A Servant" by Maranatha Singers:

Make me a servant
Humble and meek
Lord let me lift up
Those who are weak
And may the prayer of my life always be
"Make me a servant...today."

We used to sing these songs in church many years ago, so I knew them by heart. But it's one thing to sing the words from my mind, and another thing to let its spiritual melody flow from my heart.

If this had happened years ago, I know I would have gone through it with a different attitude. But brokenness and disappointment and unmet expectation have proven to be good teachers. With gladness and joy I did the best I could under the circumstances... singing in my heart... praying... believing that this servant girl's broken bone is healing faster than it normally would. I spoke life to her everyday, building faith in her heart to believe in the miraculous intervention and provision of Almighty God, Jehovah Rophe and Jehovah Jireh.

I wish I could have stayed longer in Manila, but other appointments were waiting for me back home. With a heavy heart I left for the airport Monday noon for my return flight back to my home city of Bacolod. I was just so thankful that the timing of the events was more than perfect. On the day of Aiza's fall, my sister had also just arrived. So, even with me being gone, there is another willing person in our home who will help look after the needs of our domestic helper, and also do the other chores needing to be attended to, while waiting for the bone to set and be fully restored.

It's been nearly a month since Obedient One and I reached Manila after spending the holidays together with our whole family.

How quickly the days have flown by! Yet each of these days left a mark on my heart. The events of the recent weeks have served to remind me of an important lesson God taught me years ago: walking in the opposite spirit. 

It was Youth With a Mission founding father, Loren Cunningham, who wrote of this beautiful lesson in his excellent book entitled, Winning God's Way. 

...There are only two kingdoms and they are at war. We need to win for the kingdom of light by moving... in the opposite way that Satan is working. Where he is spreading hate we must show love. Where greed prevails we must outdo everyone in our giving. Where intolerance is winning we need to show loyalty and forgiveness. God's Spirit enters into this world through His people, moving in the opposite spirit to wrest the power from the god of this world and give it to Jesus who is King of kings and Lord of lords. 

Applying this lesson in my life has been a tremendous boost to my spiritual growth. Whenever I was facing a difficult situation, God would remind me to simply discern the kind of spirit that I was battling, and then begin to move in the opposite direction:

walking in faith, instead of fear

in peace, not in anxiety

in kindness, instead of criticism

choosing forgiveness over anger

walking in integrity, not in dishonesty

in victory, instead of defeat

choosing compassion over judgment

generosity, not greed

extending grace and appreciation instead of finding fault

walking in righteousness to combat corruption.


With joy I heard the Master speak a word of praise to my heart. You have done well, My child. You have begun to learn the lesson of being a true servant in my kingdom. You have reflected My heart, You have been a messenger of hope.

At the Passover Seder, the Jews sing a popular song of Da'yenu.

Da'yenu is a Hebrew phrase that means, "It would have been enough to praise God."

Da'yenu is a simple, yet beautiful poem of fifteen stanzas describing acts of God's kindness - each stanza stating that it would have been 'enough' had God only helped us in one way. It tells the story of how the Israelites were saved from their slavery in Egypt to the time they reached Canaan, a total of fifteen acts of divine kindness, each act alone worthy of praise.

"Even more so must we praise God, for He had performed all of them!" (The Tanach Study Center)

How easy it is to begin each day with a sense of lack... not having enough... circumstances not being to our satisfaction... a demanding spirit that all go in accordance with our wishes and desires... that there be no delays... or interruptions.

Father Richard Rohr suggests we pray the Da'yenu at the start of each day. If we begin our day with any notion of scarcity, not enoughness, victimhood, or "I desrve", I promise you the day will not be good -- for you or for those around you. Nor will God be glorified. (Unpacking Paradoxes, January 30, 2012)


On this my fifth blog anniversary post, I thank God for the many valuable lessons He has taught me these past five years. The journey is not over, but my Father in heaven can be counted on to keep His promise to never leave or forsake.

Continue to teach me how to be a servant, doing all things well to reflect Your heart, to bring glory and honor to your name, dear Father.

Below is a beautiful song adapted from the prayer of St. Francis. I have sung it often these past days, and my prayer is that its message will ring true in my own life.

Instrument of Peace
(adapted from the prayer of St. Francis by Marc Jordan, Stephan Moccio, and Amy Sky)

Where there is hatred, let me bring love

Where there is doubt, let me bring faith

Where there is falsehood, let me bring truth

Where there is pain, I'll comfort you

Where there is silence, let me sing praise

Where there's despair, let me bring hope

Where there is blindness, let me bring sight

Where there is darkness, let me bring light

And with these words I speak

Grant that I may not seek

to be heard, but to hear

to be consoled, but to console

to be seen, but to see

to be loved, but to love

For when we give love, we will receive

When we forgive love, we'll find reprieve

It is in dying we'll be released

Make me an instrument

Of peace

Life Metaphor

photo source

Your eyes saw my unformed body;

all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

- Psalm 139:16

Place me like a seal over your heart,
like a seal on your arm;
for love is as strong as death,
its jealousy unyielding as the grave.
It burns like blazing fire,
like a mighty flame.
Many waters cannot quench love;
rivers cannot sweep it away.
If one were to give
all the wealth of one’s house for love,
it would be utterly scorned.

- Song of Songs 8:6, 7




“At that time,” declares the LORD,
“I will be the God of all the families of Israel, and they will be my people.”

This is what the LORD says:

“The people who survive the sword
will find favor in the wilderness;
I will come to give rest to Israel.”

The LORD appeared to us in the past,saying:

“I have loved you with an everlasting love;
I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.
I will build you up again,
and you, Virgin Israel, will be rebuilt.
Again you will take up your timbrels
and go out to dance with the joyful.
Again you will plant vineyards
on the hills of Samaria;
the farmers will plant them
and enjoy their fruit.
There will be a day when watchmen cry out
on the hills of Ephraim,
‘Come, let us go up to Zion,
to the LORD our God.’”

- Jeremiah 31:1-6




Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

- Isaiah 40:28-31



Then Moses went up to God,
and the LORD called to him from the mountain and said,
“This is what you are to say to the descendants of Jacob
and what you are to tell the people of Israel:

‘You yourselves have seen what I did to Egypt,
and how I carried you on eagles’ wings
and brought you to Myself.

Now if you obey me fully and keep my covenant,
then out of all nations you will be my treasured possession.
Although the whole earth is mine,
you will be for me a kingdom of priests and a holy nation.’

These are the words you are to speak to the Israelites.”

- Exodus 19:3-6

Tomorrow is my 59th birthday.

The 27th of March has always been a very special day, and March, a very special month for me.

I believe it is because ever since I was a little girl, this date has always been celebrated.

Yes, from the time I was born, my life has been celebrated.

I have seen pictures on my baby album... my mother and father beaming with pride over me their first born daughter. When I turned one year old, there was a huge birthday party, with over fifty guests present. There is even a handwritten list in my father's handwriting of all the gifts I received.

Then, every year thereafter, up to the time I turned 18, my birthday has been celebrated with a party.

I look back at all those years today... those years when I have been celebrated as a person. And I am humbled, and deeply touched.

Looking back, I can only feel my heart overflowing with thanksgiving for the kind of upbringing that God has provided for me.

As a child, just growing up and learning to find myself, I remember that I was a bit self-centered. Growing up, there were times when I felt I was merely being tolerated, not really fully loved, and often misunderstood. I remember that deep inside I had certain demands that life turn out for me as I wanted it to.

Well, I believe those feelings are normal of any young person.

My perspective began to change when God gradually revealed His plans for my life, revealed to me that He was my God and Creator... Redeemer and King.

In 1953, I was born into this world... but I know that God had conceived the idea of me and carried me in His heart for millenniums.

And so today, on the eve of my 59th year, my heart is brimming over with thanksgiving to God... for celebrating me.

He sent me parents, a sister, and aunts, uncles and cousins, dear friends... who celebrated and valued me as a person.

Then when the time was right, in 1978, He gave me a dear husband who celebrated me as well.

And today, on this my 59th birthday... I can say that I am surrounded by family members who love me and appreciate me: my two sons First Born and Worshiper, my daughter Obedient One, my daughters in love God-given and Chosen One, and my two grandsons Forerunner and Full of Hope/Mighty Warrior... and numerous friends who truly care.

I cannot ask for more, really.

My life may not be perfect in the eyes of some - but for me, the boundary lines have fallen in pleasant places!

O Lord You are the portion of my inheritance
and my cup,
You maintain my lot,
The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places;
Yes I have a good inheritance.

This is the cry of praise that is on my heart this early morning as I write this post...





And today I will do something very special: I will put into writing my life metaphor. This is the first time I will ever do it, because I haven't really thought much about what my life metaphor is.

I didn't even know there was such a thing as a life metaphor. But a month or two ago, during one Sunday morning, the words of my pastor, Joe Ascalon, struck my heart deeply. As he was giving the message, he asked this question: "What is your life metaphor?"

Off and on, during the quiet moments in the midst of the busyness of these past two months, I have found myself contemplating this question.

I couldn't figure out what my life metaphor was.

Because, really... we don't start out in life with our life goals clearly spelled out for us. These things just somehow begin falling into place, not really intentionally, but more as a consequence of our life choices.

I realize now that we all have a life metaphor that may not be clearly spelled out, but it is there as a motivating, guiding force that leads us.

Without our knowing it, there is an underlying life metaphor that begins to define us... who we are, what goals we reach for.

I returned to my home city of Bacolod last Friday after having been in Manila for 35 days - more than a month. Really, I felt like staying longer in Manila... but there were a number of important things for me to do here at the end of this month.

Now I realize that above all my reasons for coming back on Friday God had an important line for me to hear on Sunday morning. Yesterday, at church, Pastor Joe during his sermon, mentioned one line that caught my attention.

He said, "Establish a life statement and live it out."

Wham! It hit my heart again. Yes Lord, I hear You.

So, last night, I spent time in God's presence... listening to worship music, and thinking of some of my favorite verses.

And suddenly, I saw my life metaphor before me... not written in black and white, but in a picture - a picture of a long road... covered with clouds at some points, shrouded in mist at some points, many rocky places... a few rivers to cross over... meadows of beautiful flowers bathed with sunlight at some points... through valleys, through mountains... and at the end of it, so far away, was a place that filled my heart with such joyous anticipation.

It was my life metaphor... as clear as daylight to me.

My life is a journey to the heart of the One Who loves me.
My life is a response of love to that love.

Wow! I couldn't believe it. All I did was ask the Father to show me what my life metaphor was, and He showed me.

I woke up early this morning to write this post. I played my favorite worship songs...

And He is speaking to me now, not in audible words, but more as a truth realization, and as he "speaks" I am typing the words.

These are the impressions I am receiving:

Your whole life is a journey, a sacred pilgrimage that takes you nearer and closer to the heart of the One who loves you with an everlasting love... My heart!

Your life is a lifetime of drawing near to Me, longing for more of Me, hungering to know Me more, and seeking to obey Me.

And as you are seeking, you are receiving.

What you want, what you long for the most, is what you receive... in full measure, and way beyond what you ask or imagine.

For I am the God who sees your heart. I am the God of the multiplication... who rewards the one who seeks Me beyond what your eyes can see, or what your mind can comprehend.

Your life is a fragrant offering of worship to me. Imperfect as you think the circumstances of your life have been, I am the God who holds the imperfect pieces of your life in My eternal hands.

Your life is not a struggle or a striving... Your life is a river flowing... Your life is a dance... your life is a song.

I have created you not for striving... but for rest.

And indeed you are loved by others... because out of your heart flows My love and My compassion for them! In your eyes are reflected the love of My heart for this dying world. And yet it is never a burden for you... never too heavy for you to carry.

I want you to continue living and abiding in My love as you journey closer to your heavenly eternal home. You impart My peace... you impart My rest... you impart a sense of shalom... you create an atmosphere of worship... in the lives of people to whom I send you.

Amen and amen. So be it, dear Father. So be it, my Lord.

As I journey down this road, I want to be a voice of hope, a ray of light, a word of encouragement, a helping hand, a messenger of faith, a speaker of truth...

I want to be a reflection of the Father's heart...


At this very moment, out of my heart flows a response of love to His invitation for me to keep drawing near to Him!

His words are so clear, and minister deeply to my heart. Heaven is a topic so dear to my heart, it really is a place I am longing to see!

Below are three of my favorite songs for this season, in response to what God has spoken to me.

I pray that you will take time to listen to the songs, and that as you do so, your time spent today on this blog will be a time of personal encounter with the Living God, the One who loves you with an everlasting love.

Oceans Will Part
by Hillsong

If my heart has grown cold
There Your love will unfold
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand
When I'm blind to my way
There Your Spirit will pray
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand

Oceans will part nations come
At the whisper of Your call
Hope will rise glory shown
In my life Your will be done

Present suffering may pass
Lord Your mercy will last
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand
And my heart will find praise
I'll delight in Your way
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand

Oceans Will Part

Eagle's Wings
Hillsong

Here I am waiting
Abide in me I pray
Here I am longing for You
Hide me in Your love
Bring me to my knees
May I know Jesus more and more

Come live in me
All my life take over
Come breathe in me
And I will rise
On eagles wings

Here In Your Presence
New Life Worship


Found in Your hands, fullness of joy
Every fear suddenly wiped away here in Your presence
All of my gains now fade away
Every crown no longer on display, here in Your presence
Heaven is trembling in awe of Your wonders
The kings and their kingdom arestanding amazed

Here in Your presence, we are undone
Here in Your presence, Heaven and Earth become one
Here in Your presence, all things are new
Here in Your presence, everything bows before You

Wonderful, beautiful, glorious, matchless in every way
Wonderful, beautiful, glorious, matchless in every way

Here In Your Presence


Watch New Life Worship sing this awesome song of worship (YouTube)

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD,
“plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

- Jeremiah 29:11

This post is lovingly dedicated to my pastor, Joe Ascalon.
Today, I want to say that I love you, and I honor you, and I respect the kingdom assignment that God has called you to do.

God of My Surrender

The LORD is my Banner

by Gustave Dore

photo source

Do not harden your hearts as you did at Meribah,

as you did that day at Massah in the wilderness...
- Psalm 95:8

You have given a banner to those who fear You,
that it may be displayed because of the truth.

- Psalm 60:4




And in that day there shall be a Root of Jesse,
Who shall stand as a banner to the people;
for the Gentiles shall seek Him,
and His resting place shall be glorious.

- Isaiah 11:10

Exodus 17: 10-17

So Joshua fought the Amalekites as Moses had ordered, and Moses, Aaron and Hur went to the top of the hill. As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. When Moses’ hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up—one on one side, one on the other—so that his hands remained steady till sunset. So Joshua overcame the Amalekite army with the sword.

Then the LORD said to Moses, “Write this on a scroll as something to be remembered and make sure that Joshua hears it, because I will completely blot out the name of Amalek from under heaven.”

Moses built an altar and called it The LORD is my Banner. He said, “Because hands were lifted up against the throne of the LORD, the LORD will be at war against the Amalekites from generation to generation.”

I arrived in Manila five days ago.

It always feels good to be back. Although I have lived in Bacolod for the past thirty-two years, Manila, the city where I was born and raised, will always be home to me. The last time I was here was two and half months ago, and as I waited outside baggage claim for an empty cab, there was a sense of child-like excitement in my heart.

Traffic was unusually light the afternoon I flew in. From the airport, it only took me less than an hour to reach our home in Quezon City.

I was greeted by my father's Melendrez tree in full bloom!

Whenever I enter our front door after having been away for a time, the first thing I do is to praise God and lift my heart in thanksgiving.

Praise the LORD, my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
Praise the LORD, my soul, and forget not all his benefits...
- Psalm 103:1,2

Indeed, there are so many things to be thankful for... I never ever want to forget God's benefits. And there is something about being thankful that imparts life to any environment that we enter.

This is the home where my sister and I were brought up by loving and kind parents. The place still holds many beautiful memories for me even though my parents have long passed away, and my only sister resides abroad with her family.

Many changes have taken place in the immediate neighborhood. But the sense of peace and serenity is still unmistakable in this place.

Now this too is home to my youngest child, Obedient One, who started living here five years ago.

Change.

It is an inevitable fact of life.

As often mentioned in my previous posts, we are always in a state of flux.

In transit.

Much as I want to hold on to the beauty, comfort and security of my past, all I have left are the memories. And even those will soon fade with time.

Nothing is ever permanent. The only certainty... the only constant in a world of change, is God Himself.


Gracious uncertainty. That's how Oswald Chambers refers to it.

He writes,

Certainty is the mark of the commonsense life—gracious uncertainty is the mark of the spiritual life. To be certain of God means that we are uncertain in all our ways, not knowing what tomorrow may bring. This is generally expressed with a sigh of sadness, but it should be an expression of breathless expectation. We are uncertain of the next step, but we are certain of God. As soon as we abandon ourselves to God and do the task He has placed closest to us, He begins to fill our lives with surprises.

Change confronts us as seasons come and go -- expected or unexpected.... welcome or not... change often enters our lives without asking permission.

And while it is true that we have little or no control over some of these changes, one thing is clear: we are free to choose our response in the midst of a difficult season.

I just love what Oswald Chambers says: As soon as we abandon ourselves to God and do the task He has placed closest to us, He begins to fill our lives with surprises.

Yes, indeed. We can position our hearts for the surprises of God.

The choice is up to us.



The Israelites went through a season of major change, and with it many opportunities to grow up, to be more appreciative, to mature... to look at life from a new perspective. The Almighty God was in their midst, and they saw with their own eyes the awesome display of His power.

How did they respond to change?

Stiff-necked and rebellious, that's what they were... choosing to complain at the slightest inconvenience.

The Israelites had just set up camp at Rephidim where they became thirsty and realized there was no water to drink. They grumbled ... complained... and grumbled some more. I cannot imagine what it must have been like for Moses to constantly listen to the whine and the clamor of two million newly freed slaves.

God shows Moses how to get water. "I will stand there before you by the rock at Horeb. Strike the rock, and water will come out of it for the people to drink." - Exodus 17:6

Water gushed forth... and there was more than enough for every person's thirst to be satisfied. Yet Moses named the place Massah and Meribah, Hebrew words that mean "Testing" and "Contention." Named as such because by their constant complaining and murmuring, the Israelites did put God to the test.

The truth is that you and I are made of very much the same stuff as they.


During the early years of my married life, I complained a lot.

In some of my earlier posts I write of my struggles with perfectionism. Everything had to be just right; it was hard to measure up to my standards. They were quite high.

But somewhere along my journey toward soul transformation, God looked at me with compassion, reached down, and rescued me from this terrible disposition.

Much work remains, but this I know for sure: setting me free from a complaining spirit is one of the best things that God has ever done for me.



C.S. Lewis wrote a little book entitled The Great Divorce, one of the greatest books he has ever written, in my humble opinion. An allegorical tale, the book is written in the same literary genre as Dante's Divine Comedy, and Bunyan's Pilgrim's Progress.

In a few paragraphs Lewis describes how a person may degenerate from grumbler to grumble.

"'... The question is whether she is a grumbler or only a grumble. If there is a real woman -- even the least trace of one-- still there inside the grumbling it can be brought to life again. If there is one wee spark under all those ashes, we'll blow it till the whole pile is red and clear. But if there's nothing but ashes we'll not go on blowing them in our own eyes forever... They must be swept up.'

'But how can there be a grumble without a grumbler?'

'The whole difficulty of understanding Hell is that the thing to be understood is so nearly Nothing. But ye'll have had experiences... it begins with a grumbling mood, and yourself still distinct from it: perhaps criticizing it. And yourself, in a dark hour, may will that mood, embrace it. Ye can repent and come out of it again. But there may come a day when you can do that no longer. Then there will be no you left to criticize the mood, nor even to enjoy it, but just the grumble itself going on forever like a machine...'"

C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce, pp. 75-78

I remember reading this book many years ago and running to God, pleading with Him to deliver me from a grumbling spirit. The process of change in my heart had started even before that night, but praise be to God, He knew how much I needed to read that book at that particular time.

I have since realized that a complaining spirit puts God to the test because each time I murmur against any change, any difficulty, or any unforeseen event in my life, I am actually murmuring against God, making me guilty of the sin of unbelief.

Indeed, a grumbling, fault-finding spirit is rooted in unbelief. A complaint is a message that God is not good enough, or that He is not big... or wise... or strong enough.

God is not enough. Period.

In naming the place Massah and Meribah, Moses was describing the character of that territory.

Lyndon, a dear friend, mentioned this during our Exodus 17 study a few weeks ago: From a mere entry point, a complaining attitude gains a foothold, and eventually becomes a stronghold.

If we are in the habit of complaining about anything we are not in favor of, eventually a spirit of murmuring takes over, and claims ownership of that place.

Finding fault with just about everything becomes a natural response.

Where the enemy has been given a legal ground to stay, he willingly takes up residence.

The kind of acts and attitudes frequently exhibited in a place will eventually define the atmosphere or climate over that place.

A complaining spirit attracts other spirits to come as well - arguing, disputing, discontented, hard to please, demanding, bitter. These kinds of spirit shrivel up and dry up the heart. The environment becomes barren and lifeless.




But there is hope.

If we cry out to God, He comes to our rescue. He will not leave us defenseless.

While still at Rephidim (named Massah and Meribah by Moses), the Israelites are attacked by Amalekites. The two stories connect, and I believe there is a spiritual significance.

We will not go far in our journey if we are carrying a heavy baggage of arguing, disputing and finger-pointing.

We will have to unload... allow God to prove that He is God who redeems and restores.

With hearts weighed down by contention and quarrelling, the Israelites face a dead end.

A battle against Amalek ensues. In the natural, victory is impossible.

The enemy fought dirty, hitting them from behind; the hearts of the Israelites were not right. They had no spiritual energy with which to fight.

Moses knew the problem... and the solution.

He exercises his authority, lifting up his hands to intercede.... until the breakthrough comes.

Interceding... that the deeply entrenched spirit of unbelief, as manifested by a habitual grumbling attitude, may be broken.

Joshua wins the battle against Amalek, but it takes the intercession of Moses, aided by Aaron and Hur, to provide the spiritual atmosphere. With the help of these two men, Moses interceded until the yoke of unbelief was broken. In both the physical and the spiritual realm, it required hard work.

And because of his obedient intercession, Israel was spared.

In this case, intercession was a matter of life and death for the Israelites. Their victory depended on what Moses did.

After the battle was won, Moses did not plant a flag. To commemorate the event, Moses chose to worship God.

He built an altar and called it Jehovah Nissi, "The Lord is my Banner."

A powerful example of what obedient intercession can achieve in the battles that we face.

That place of unbelief was transformed into a place of victory.



This is the cry of my heart today:

My Jehovah Nissi...
shine
your healing light
in the dark crevices of my heart

where hide fear, anxiety, unbelief...
reluctant to accept change...
I cling, hold fast
to old places of comfort and security...

Wash
every stain of fault-finding,
complaining...
and finger-pointing;

Guide...
lead me up the hill
of obedient intercession...


Amalek
the spirit of cowardice,
must gain
no foothold in my life.

Help me build today,
in my heart
that altar of victory...

for You are my Banner,
"God of my surrender"--
my Jehovah Nissi!

Just sharing a few things to be thankful for...

Some parts of the garden have suffered from the severe hot and dry spell we've had in the recent weeks. But despite the erratic weather, the bromeliads are blooming all over the place!

A graphic reminder that life triumphs over death!










One of the joys that deeply touches my heart is our maid Irene who serves us faithfully, keeping our Manila home clean, our garden well - watered... doing the other daily chores with such a joyful and uncomplaining spirit.






It's amazing how much joy a little dog can bring to our hearts!




My daughter Obedient One came back recently from a trip to Hong Kong and Macau. She knows I love to write, and my heart was overjoyed at this gift that she bought for me:

Do everything without grumbling or arguing,
so that you may become blameless and pure,
“children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.”
Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky
as you hold firmly to the word of life.

- Philippians 2:14-16

Taking Authority

Then the LORD said to Joshua,
“Hold out toward Ai the javelin that is in your hand,
for into your hand I will deliver the city.”
So Joshua held out toward the city the javelin that was in his hand.
- Joshua 8:18

photo source






Behold, I give you the authority to trample on serpents and scorpions,
and over all the power of the enemy,
and nothing shall by any means hurt you.

- Luke 10:19




Ask of Me, and I will give You
The nations for Your inheritance,
And the ends of the earth for Your possession.
You shall break them with a rod of iron;
You shall dash them to pieces like a potter’s vessel.

- Psalm 2:8, 9

Then the LORD reached out his hand
and touched my mouth and said to me,
“I have put my words in your mouth.
See, today I appoint you over nations and kingdoms
to uproot and tear down,
to destroy and overthrow,
to build and to plant.”

- Jeremiah 1:9

As another month ends, I listen to my heart to find the appropriate name for it.

Giving each month a name helps me keep track of my spiritual progress... to own my experiences, admit where I have fallen short, and to face up to the challenges ahead of me.

Naming the month also gives me a perspective to view the lessons learned from the past weeks, as well as a platform from which to launch the strategy for the next stage of the journey.

Living as a kingdom person. This has been my goal and desire for this year.

In January I began meditating on the book of Joshua, one chapter at a time, where I have found many kingdom principles that can be applied in my spiritual pursuits.

This month I have looked closely at chapters 7 and 8.

Joshua 7 records the story of the defeat encountered by the Israelites at Ai. After their glorious Jericho experience, it was easy to be presumptuous, and forget to seek the Lord's counsel about His battle plans for the next city.

Ai represents many things.

It stands for presumptuousness and pride... misplaced confidence... complacency.

For Joshua, the distance between a glorious victory and a humbling defeat was way too short.

Instead of consulting the Lord regarding the next step to take, he listened to the voice of advisers who told him Ai was chicken feed:

"Not all the army will have to go up against Ai. Send two or three thousand men to take it and do not weary the whole army, for only a few people live there.”

Confident of victory, Joshua sent only about three thousand men to fight the battle at Ai.

... but they were routed by the men of Ai, who killed about thirty-six of them.

Joshua thought victory was sure; instead, he suffered shame.

A costly lesson, one Israel will never forget.

God was building His kingdom in their hearts, and when it comes to God's kingdom, righteousness is the top requirement.

Obedience is a must.

Achan had taken from the riches of Jericho after it was conquered, even though they were clearly instructed that the whole city, meaning all its people and their properties, was devoted to destruction.

The LORD said to Joshua, "... Israel has sinned;
they violated my covenant, which I commanded them to keep.

They have taken some of the devoted things;

they have stolen,

they have lied,

they have put them with their own possessions.

That is why the Israelites cannot stand against their enemies;
they turn their backs and run
because they have been made liable to destruction.

I will not be with you anymore
unless you destroy whatever among you is devoted to destruction.”

They have been made liable to destruction.

What a chilling rebuke from the Lord of Lords and the King of Kings.


Unconditional obedience to the Lord's commands is for our own protection.

I cannot compromise my kingdom status by exchanging it for a Babylonian robe and a few shekels of silver!

Obedience.

My life depends on it.


Purity... it's a prerequisite for victory.


Because of Achan's disobedience, the life of an entire nation was endangered. Achan had to be put to death, together with his whole family, a graphic and sobering reminder to everyone that God will not allow His kingdom to be tainted or defiled.

Then all Israel stoned him,
and after they had stoned the rest, they burned them.
Over Achan they heaped up a large pile of rocks,
which remains to this day.

Then the LORD turned from his fierce anger.
Therefore that place has been called the Valley of Achor ever since.

The amazing thing about God is that He does not remain angry forever.

The Valley of Achor was named as such because of the trouble that Achan brought upon Israel. But in another passage, God Himself promises restoration to Israel; the same valley becomes a door of hope.

Therefore I am now going to allure her;
I will lead her into the wilderness
and speak tenderly to her.
There I will give her back her vineyards,
and will make the Valley of Achor a door of hope.

- Hosea 2:14, 15

We all have our own places of Ai and Achor, but we need not remain there.

God's heart towards His people is always to redeem and to restore.

Once Achan's sin was dealt with, God once again revealed to Joshua the game plan for Ai.

From a place of former defeat, Ai becomes a place of victory.

Achor, a valley of trouble, is transformed into a doorway for hope to enter.


Having learned a valuable lesson, Joshua was careful to obey the Lord every step of the way.

“Hold out toward Ai the javelin that is in your hand,
for into your hand I will deliver the city.”

Joshua did so, and Ai was conquered.

Twelve thousand men and women fell that day—all the people of Ai. For Joshua did not draw back the hand that held out his javelin until he had destroyed all who lived in Ai. But Israel did carry off for themselves the livestock and plunder of this city, as the LORD had instructed Joshua.

- Joshua 8:25-27

As a result of Joshua's obedience, not only was Ai conquered, all the plunder of the city was theirs to keep.


May the spiritual lessons God has spoken to me these past weeks be forever embedded in my heart!

Therefore, I name this month Taking Authority.

By complacency... presumption... or disobedience, I could lose the fight, and allow the enemy to take over precious territory that rightfully belongs to me.

God had given Joshua authority, as represented in the spear, or the javelin, that he had in his hand.

The clear message of God to me for the month just ended is to take my stand, and use the God-given authority that I have.

It is easy to lose sight of this...

in a moment of weakness, it is easy to be carried away by the mundane...

to exchange my spiritual birthright for a bowl of stew...

to let my strength wane, to let my energies be dissipated by taking on assignments not meant for me to carry.

Yes, it is easy to be presumptuous... even in the way we interpret God's word, the way we think we understand.

Taking authority means something only when I recognize that I am under a Higher authority. When I humbly stand under God's authority, He opens doors of understanding for me to walk through.


These past weeks my eyes have been opened to my own spiritual needs, and that of my family.

But really, I know that my life is not for the needs of my family circle alone, though the needs are legitimate.

I lift up my church to God.

I lift up my city to God.

My province... my beloved homeland ... other nations that God lays on my heart.

Thailand.

America.

The Middle East.

Israel.


This month the truth was brought home to me. I must be about my Father's business.

And being about my Father's business means

... saying no to complacency and presumptuousness.

... saying no to self-focus.

... saying yes to obedience.

... saying yes to worship and intercession and a deeper intimacy with God.

... saying yes to a deeper understanding of kingdom authority.

I never presume to know all the answers... or the next move... but always willing to have my spiritual senses activated to understand what God is doing.


Ask of Me, the Lord says, and I will make the nations your inheritance, the ends of the earth your possession.


My friend Ruby and I were talking about our prayer concerns a few weeks ago. After sharing with her what was on my heart, she said something that stuck.

Do not stop praying until the breakthrough comes.

I pondered over those words. They were a timely reminder to me in the midst of the battles we all face everyday.


It is easy to be sidetracked by what is temporary, and to lose sight of our eternal priorities.

Am I building God's kingdom, or my own?

More often than not, I give a mental assent ... but my heart is not in it.


This month, I was given a ministry opportunity to be manager of the Intercessors for the Philippines (IFP) office in Bacolod City.

After seeking the Lord's heart about it, my initial reluctance gave way to obedience.

“I have put my words in your mouth.
See, today I appoint you over nations and kingdoms
to uproot and tear down,
to destroy and overthrow,
to build and to plant.”

- Jeremiah 1:9

Now I am looking forward to this new role.

As May comes to an end, I am grateful for the direction that God has given.

Juan and Helen Coromina
Intercessors for the Philippines Prayer Coordinators for the Visayas

It's another step of faith, another step of obedience. But a great opportunity to be mentored by a couple I look up to, Juan and Helen Coromina, Intercessors for the Philippines prayer coordinators for the Visayas Islands of this nation.

Above all, it is a move that takes me to the next level.


As the month was ending, I sensed God saying to me... "This is an invitation to partner with Me in the work I am doing."

What an honor... what a privilege!

Only a fool would say no to such an invitation.

I only ask God that as I stretch out my spear of authority over the places of former defeat in my life, victory and breakthrough will come.

And, I am looking forward to the plunder that God has said is mine as well!






Special family events for this month:

MAY 8 - Mother's Day

Mother's Day fresh flowers from second son, Worshiper. He went to the flower market downtown on the eve of the special day and bought many flowers for me. Yellow was my husband's favorite color. And I really love chrysanthemums and asters. Thank you, my dear son. Your thoughtfulness always touches my heart.

MAY 9 -First Born Son's birthday


This was First Born's 31st birthday. He and his wife work nights, and in this photo, both of them had just come from work. But they do not even look tired, or sleepy. We had a special breakfast at McDonalds, just the three of us.

First Born, God-given, and their son Forerunner (Matthew). The three of them, second son Worshiper, and I had a very special birthday lunch out of town, at a seaside place two cities away from Bacolod, called Balaring. We had a feast of sea food, including freshly caught oysters, and mouth watering grilled squid. Worshiper's wife, Chosen One, and their baby Full of Hope (Elijah) were in Manila at that time.

First-Born son will always have a special place in our family, because he is the son that opened my womb! When Ernie and I dedicated him to the Lord in church the second Sunday after he was born, through tear filled eyes, we sang a special song dedicating this son to God, "Jesus be the Lord of All."

Jesus be the Lord of all
Jesus be the Lord of all
Jesus be the Lord of all
The kingdoms of my heart

Jesus I surrender all
Jesus I surrender all
Jesus I surrender all
The kingdoms of my heart

Dearest First Born Son,
you were dedicated to God from the moment you were conceived.
Your Heavenly Father has a very special plan and purpose for you.
He holds you close to His heart,
He keeps you safe through all the seasons of your life.
I thank God for you!
You are very special.
The kindness of your heart shines through your eyes!
I love you, dearest son!

Other month-end posts for this year:

January 2011: Walking

February 2011: Yielding

March 2011: Beautiful

April 2011: Contending