An Open Heart: Authenticity and Trust

The currency of blogging is authenticity and trust.

- Jason Calacanis

A blog is only as interesting as the interest shown in others.

- Lee Odden

This blog has been around for more than seven years, and has over five hundred entries. 

One of the main reasons I have kept this blog going is that it has been a repository for the chapters of my life story. But it is not a mere chronicle of events; it is, rather, an interpretation of these events, my attempt to make sense and derive meaning out of my life circumstances.

Hopefully in the re-telling of the stories, one or two readers passing by may find inspiration and encouragement for the journey ahead of them.

In its earlier years, I would get as many as thirty comments for my entries... these days, I'd be happy to get five.

Honestly though, I like to receive comments, for the response that readers leave are a form of dialogue between me and my audience. But since I don't really write blogs for comments, that gives me the freedom to enjoy writing my blog posts, whether others read it or not... whether those who do read it leave comments or not. 

In a sense, the writing is in itself the reward.

The other huge reward I have received from blogging is the friends I have made through the years. They are people from around the globe that I would never have met were it not for their blogs.

Like my own blog, their blogs are very much like open hearts... they allow their readers a glimpse into what is inside - both the beautiful and the ugly, the profound and the shallow, the joys and sorrows, the victories and the defeats.

Recently a dear blog friend who lives in Japan gave me a blog award. Her name is Connie, the blog author of Joyful Solitude.

It's been years since anyone passed on a blog award to me, and I was not expecting to receive one at this point in my blogging life.

Nevertheless I was delighted with the award, because I have known Connie for a number of years now, and I know that when she gives away a blog award, she means it. Connie is married to a Japanese man, and I first met her when they were still living in Saipan. A few years ago they moved to Japan, and I have loved the way she is so honest, and transparent with her struggles as well as her victories living in a foreign land. She is so creative, and has made wise use of her time and available resources. 

I humbly accept this award, and I thank you, dear Connie for finding my blog worthy of this award. You are a dear friend, and one I truly appreciate and admire. Who knows, maybe one of these days, I will be given the wonderful privilege of meeting you face to face!

In accepting this award, we are asked to do three things:

1. Write a blog post about the award, where you thank the person who gave it, post a photo of the award as well as a link to that person's blog.

2. Nominate a few other blog authors that you think are deserving of this award, and post the link to their blogs.

3. Write seven things about yourself that are not commonly known.

Here are five blog authors whose blogs I consider really deserving of this award. I am not very sure that they will do the three things that are required of them, but let me post their blogs here just the same.

I pass on this Lovely Blog Award to the following:

1. Rebecca at Rebecca King's Blog. She lives in England, and is a deep well of spiritual water... and I have loved drinking from her well. (This is her current blog, Soar,)

2. Elaine at Peace for the Journey. An author of two books, she lives in North Carolina, and is a cancer overcomer. I love her for her honesty and depth. She writes beautifully... from the heart.

3. Sara at Back Porch Sheep. She lives in Michigan, and she loves dogs, her job, her family ... oh well, Sara loves life. She truly has a heart of compassion. She writes with such a depth of insight, I often find myself nodding in agreement with what she says.

4. Mayang at Home With Father. She is a dear friend of mine, we go to the same church here in Bacolod City. I have seen her journey of faith. She truly desires to be a woman after God's heart. Her blog will encourage you.

5. Denise at Simply Surrender. She is one of my dearest blog friends. She lives in Maryland. In the fall of 2013, I visited the USA and stayed till early 2014... and she and I made plans of meeting face to face in Wasington D.C. I would have loved to see this dear friend, but maybe next time. Her writing literally takes my breath away. And her photos... oh, her photos! Check out her blog and find out for yourself.

Here are a few things about myself, some of which most people already know, I think.

1. Even at 62, I still love wearing denims and sneakers. I want to dress comfortably, and when I have a favorite pair of denim pants, I keep wearing them (wash and wear again) until they wear out. I love 100 percent cotton blouses and shirts. If I have to dress up, I'd rather be in relaxed formals than a stiff gown or dress. 

2. Generally speaking, I don't do make up. When I go out, I only wear light lip gloss and light eye-shadow. For dressing up occasions, I like the "no makeup look" makeup. And I only like MAC.

3. I love simple elegance, and classical music.

4. I don't mind being alone... it's okay for me to go to a coffee shop or eat in a restaurant all by myself.

5. I love Facebook and blogging because it keeps me connected to my friends around the world.

6. I miss having deep, intelligent conversations about spiritual matters with another human being.

7a. Someday soon, with God's help, I will begin writing my book.

7b. Someday, I would really like to have a golden retriever and take him out for walks.

Thanks... I guess that is all I have to say for now. 

Farewell, Baby Rowan...

Rowan Tree flowers

Rejoice with those who rejoice;

mourn with those who mourn.

- Romans 12:15

On June 11, 2012, my dear friend "Mrs. Mac" wrote this entry on her blog:

My sweet Rowan passed into the loving arms of our Heavenly Father at 3:12 this afternoon. God gave her a beautiful day for her home coming .. perfect blue skies .. and a beautiful sunset. My how one little gift from God changed so many lives. What a privilege it has been being her grandmother.  My heart rejoices knowing that hers has been made whole.

Thank you to the many readers and friends that have been praying for our little heart warrior. She was born with hypo-plastic left heart syndrome where the left side of her heart did not form properly. Our family will see her once again in Heaven.

Rowan's mom Katie gave birth to her on December 12, 2011. They first found out about the baby's heart condition in August, four months before she was to be born.

This news required the whole family to gear up for the coming birth - and many friends - face to face, blogger, and FB friends -- were alerted for prayer support.

I live thousands of miles away from this family, but Baby Rowan was already on my heart even before she was born.

I have never even met Mrs. Mac personally. But she is today a precious friend.

For her January 2, 2012 welcome post, she wrote these beautiful words:

A new year, month, day .. and calendar page. Last year was sparse for posting on my blog.  We had a second half of the year filled with anticipation, hope and worry with the arrival of our newest grandchild ... after learning that she has a heart condition in August .. that would need surgery soon after birth in December; it was a fast paced, hectic time to say the least.  Baby is home with her parents and big brother.  The whole event brought back so many memories 15 years ago when we welcomed our youngest son, Nathan, that needed TLC and surgeries after his birth.  Such challenges try the soul .. and create unimaginable strength.  Life goes on and we have to adjust.  May the new year bring you strength to face the possible challenges ahead in 2012.  Always be prepared, learn a new skill to help you survive whatever economic/health/weather storms may be on the horizon.

Such challenges try the soul .. and create unimaginable strength.

How appropriate her words are.


We never know what lies ahead, so her words "Always be prepared..." are words of wisdom for all of us to heed.

However, I believe that nobody can ever be fully prepared for the passing away of a loved one.

There is dignity in grief, and I know about walking alone through the valley of mourning. There are no adequate words for it.


Mrs. Mac doesn't know this, but she is one of my modern days heroes. I am one of her secret admirers.

If you ever have an opportunity to read her blog, you will have nothing but great admiration for this mighty woman of God. She has a 15 year old special needs child, Nathan - and her blog is full of stories about how she and her family have weathered this storm, and has helped them tap into an inner strength they never knew they had!

Mrs. Mac lives in North Idaho, "Snowmageddon" she calls her place during the wintertime. It really is a picture pretty place - near Coeur d'Alene and Post Falls, one of the few places I would love to visit in my lifetime.

She grows her own vegetables, maintains her home well, she bakes, cans most of what the family eats for the winter season, churns her own butter... she even makes her own laundry detergent - from scratch.

She has no time to wallow in self-pity - her daily life is full of things to do.

Yet she finds time to nurture her family relationships -- with her husband, Mr. Mac, and each of her children, including her grandchildren, Jacob and Rowan.

Facebooking has become quite an indispensable and important part of modern day communication... but you won't find me there.

I have stuck to blogging, because this is where I can pour my heart out (when I give myself time to do so), and allows me to share with whoever cares to know the recent happenings in my life and in my relationship with my heavenly Father.

Not only that, blogging has helped me connect and be in touch with the heart and soul of my blog friends.

"Mrs. Mac" (Cathy in real life) is one of such blog friends. We may not always have the time to leave comments on each other's posts, and Mrs. Mac probably doesn't know that I visit her blog place more often than she is aware of it.

But on this post, I do want to go out of my way to honor this dear woman for the beautiful way she has raised her children, equipping them for events such as this one.

I know her heart is breaking, but her faith is strong.

My heart bleeds for her daughter Katie, Rowan's mom. Her deep pain over this loss will never be felt by anyone else - except God alone, of course, and probably her own mother, Mrs. Mac.

Yet I also mourn in my own way. Ever since I received news of Rowan's homegoing, I have found myself in tears off and on. Not only me, many of us in the Scarf Sisterhood (Cathy's blog friends) have felt the same way. A common thread runs through our lives which has united us all in this season - praying for Baby Rowan... and now, grieving with her family.

Rowan Tree Berries

 photo source

It amazes me how much love there is in our hearts for one another - and most of us have never even personally met... only in the blog neighborhood do we "visit" and get to know each other.

It is really like heaven on earth, this kind of friendship.

Because in heaven, the language we speak is not the language of spoken words.

The language of heaven is feelings. Here on earth, I have to use so many words to make myself understood... but then I am fortunate to have a few friends who know how I feel without my having to use words. It is the language of intuition.

So to my dear Mrs. Mac, Mr. Mac, Katie, Ryan and the rest of the family ... as you put dear Baby Rowan's earthly body to rest this weekend, and as you go through your valley of grief for this season, know that I am keeping you close to my heart.

In the area of our deepest pain, God comes to bring healing, comfort and strength. I have experienced this first hand when my beloved Ernie went home to heaven four years ago.

God is near to the broken hearted... precious in His eyes is the death of His saints.

He keeps our tears in a bottle.

May our Father, the God of All Comfort, come alongside your family in this season of mourning.

He is the God who promises to make all things beautiful in His time.

Heaven is our hearts' true home - there God will wipe away every tear from our eyes. And in that land, there are no goodbyes.


To Baby Rowan (A tribute I wrote on the Scarf Sisters blog)
Rowan's Story (written by her mom, Katie)
Baby Rowan (Katie's account of her baby's homegoing)

Rowan Tree - Meaning

photo source

A Profitable Investment

It's my 4th Blog Anniversary today!

Keep your heart with all diligence,
For out of it spring the issues of life.
- Proverbs 4:23

Can it be that,
despite all our expressions of consternation
in the face of evil and innocent suffering,
we are all too prepared
to trivialize the mystery of evil?

- Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger
"Eighth Station"
in Meditations and Prayers
Way of the Cross at the Colosseum
Good Friday 2005




...but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil
you shall not eat,
for in the day that you eat of it
you shall surely die.
- Genesis 2:17

This blog turns four years old today!

What a special day this is... it has been an awesome journey!

This blog was conceived in eternity but born in Chiang Mai, Thailand on February 7, 2008, exactly four years ago. At that time, my husband Ernie was a foreign consultant in Maejo University, helping them to set up their International MBA program, and I was an English language teacher for the presidential staff of the university.

Chiang Mai Sunset
photo source Canvas of Light

In my early blog entries, I wrote about our life in that beautiful place, including some of the spiritual lessons God taught me during the year that we were living there.

Entries from my Chiang Mai Diary:
Homesick
Friends
Images of Chiang Mai
Farewell, Chiang Mai

We arrived back in our homeland after our term ended in September 2008. Home Again (or, New Wineskins)


Just a few weeks after we returned, Ernie passed away unexpectedly.

Songs of Deliverance
Curtain Call

This blog was my traveling companion, and provided a place for me to share my journey through grief.

Saying Good-bye
My Journey Through Grief
The Unveiling of the Tombstone

The love and compassion I received from my blog friends became the food that God used to comfort me. Subsequently, this blog also became a witness to God's healing and restorative power in my life.

The Lonely Road Ahead
Embracing the Sadness


Today, four years later, I am not the same woman that I was when this blog began.

So many things have taken place in a period of forty eight months. Translate those months to days, and they equal one thousand four hundred sixty days.


It has been said that life is like money - we can either waste it, or invest it.

The minutes of our days can so very easily go down the drain, using them for trivial pursuits or the building of our own kingdom.

But it is my heart's desire to invest my life in the pursuit of God's highest goals for me... advancing His kingdom. Thus, I consider that the hours I use each week to maintain this blog is an investment toward that goal.

The prophet Habakkuk says:

Write the vision

And make it plain on tablets,

That he may run who reads it.

For the vision is yet for an appointed time;

But at the end it will speak,

and it will not lie.

Though it tarries, wait for it;

Because it will surely come,

It will not tarry.

- Habakkuk 2:2, 3

The vision is yet for an appointed time... at the end it will speak, and it will not lie.

The primary purpose of this blog is to be a mouthpiece for God's kingdom purposes.

What's more, I firmly believe that we live on a sowing and reaping continuum. The choices I make today will have consequences for eternity, and I am sowing today the seeds that my future generations will reap.

"Generations will reap what I sow..."

And indeed, I appreciate the blog readers who have taken time to see what God is doing, and saying.

Our individual lives are like pieces of a grand puzzle. Blogging has really made the world a global village. With one click, I can visit my friend Felisol or Colleen in Norway, Amrita in India, Michelle in Kiev.

There are my friends from USA... Sharon, Rosel, and Sandy in California... Trish, Dee and Mari in Michigan... Mary, Debbie and Ken in Arizona,

Lili in Maine.... Katie from Ohio... Janette and Sonja from Texas... Mary Leigh from Kentucky... Brenda and Rebecca from Indiana...

Jennifer from Louisiana... Donna from New York... Tammi and Lis from Virginia...Clint and Cindy from Tennessee...

Stephanie from New Jersey... Sandra from Washington DC... Louise and Cathy from Idaho... Steve from Florida...

Elaine and Linda from North Carolina... Amy and Matt from Oregon... Patrina...

my very first blog friends, Bellann from Philadelphia and Kathy from Michigan...

Terry and Nikki and Child of God, dear friends in Canada.

Another click, and I can hop over to Australia to say hello to Crystal.

Beloved is a special blog friend who lives in England...

Very many blog friends... they all have important stories to share with us.

Then there's my family and Filipino friends who read my posts regularly and yet for one reason or another, never bother to leave a response on the comment box...

And there's a special group of blog friends, my Traveling Scarf sisters... each of them having a special place in my heart. I can't name them all.

I also have blog readers coming from Missouri, USA, and Missisauga, Canada - yet I have never found out who they are.

My ongoing prayer is that my life impact theirs with the words that I share on this blog.

Only in eternity will I behold the beautiful masterpiece God has woven out of the stories of our individual lives blended together into one harmonious whole.

Nothing is an accident, not a single tear is wasted.



I consider the hours spent on this blog time well spent, a profitable investment, not a waste. At the start, when this blog really took so much of my time, I had considered closing it down. But as the months and years went by, with much prayer, God has helped me discern when to write, and what to write about.

It bears repeating: At the end of the day, this blog is not about me... it is about the One writing my story.

When it comes to this weblog, my on-line journal, my prayer has often been, Lord, use this blog as a light in the darkness.

It is never my intention to make a literary masterpiece out of this blog. Thus, my posts are often unedited and unadulterated... just a realistic outpouring of the circumstances as they happen, or as a flashback, if it is called for... together with some important faith lessons that I have learned along the way.

What then is required of me, to be used as an agent of life as I go through the valley of death, becoming the voice of hope in the midst of confusion, and being a torchbearer in the darkness of this world?

Only one thing is required - to look unto Jesus, the Author and the Finisher of my faith.


Praise be to God indeed for four years of blogging. To Him alone belong the glory and the honor.

He alone gets the credit for what this blog has become in four years.

It has helped clarify the issues for me...

it has helped clear the path for me to walk on...

it has helped me recognize God's voice in the changing seasons of my life.

I pray that it has become a signpost to a wayfarer seeking direction... a wellspring of fresh water to the thirsty... a garden of refreshing to the weary traveler.

God has promised me that if I am obedient in giving out what He has spoken to me, He will keep pouring in more.

God has been faithful to feed and nourish me as well.



On February 3 and 4, just one month after the personal retreat that my friends and I had in Sonya's Garden in Tagaytay, the Women of Prayer had a start of the year retreat at Jing's beach house located south of Bacolod City. We are a group of women at our church that has met weekly these past years to spend time listening to God through His word.

It was another God-ordained opportunity to receive confirmation from Him.

Over a decade ago, God has made me aware that He speaks to me through the changing seasons of my life. During our two-day retreat, this was again God's word to us. Don't ignore the seasons that you are going through... flow with the seasons of your life.

Yes, indeed it is true. These past four years I have been through many seasons.

Once again God confirmed during our women's retreat that I am entering a season of new things and new beginnings.

And the best way that I can cooperate with Him is to continue to flow with Him, to be in step with the "unforced rhythms of His grace."

Weeping may tarry for the night,
but joy comes with the morning. - Psalm 30:5

Those who sow in tears

will reap with songs of joy. - Psalm 126:5

Day 1 - after an awesome time of worship, preparing to eat lunch

Day 2 - A group picture just before a teaching session with Lyndon, our retreat speaker

After the retreat, unwinding at the beach

The loves of my life:

My first grandson, Forerunner

My second grandson, Full of Hope/Mighty Warrior

A few of my favorite things:

My Spirit Filled Life Bible

My Henri Nouwen collection

My menorah (brought home by Pat from Hawaii) and
"Pray for Jerusalem" glass sculpture (given by Choi-Kuen Tan from Hong Kong)

My prayer shawl, given by Rosemarie

Tear bottle (given by friends from Bradenton, Florida)

anointing oil bottle (given by Trudi, from Dubai, UAE)

mineral crystal (mined from the Swiss Alps, given by Hans Burki)

My prayer for Crown of Beauty blog on its fourth anniversary:

photo source

What I Think of "Lurkers"

"Standing on the Outside Looking In"

photo source




There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:

... a time to be silent and a time to speak.

- Ecclesiastes 3:1, 7




Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
Be acceptable in Your sight,
O LORD, my strength and my Redeemer.

- Psalm 19:14

This blog has been around for three years already. Honestly, having this blog has served a good purpose: it has helped me understand more of the sacred journey that I'm on, and it has clarified, shed light on the events in my past, as well as in my present.

A plus factor in having a blog are readers who really care about what is going in my life. This has been a big encouragement to me. Their perspective, often shared with me through the comments they leave, or through personal email, has certainly been beneficial. Blog friends who care enough to speak what is on their heart have made blogging more rewarding and interesting, they have added sweetness and spice to the experience.

No blog is an island...

I believe that a blog is a two-way street, thriving on a "give and receive" relationship, a healthy exchange of ideas, a meeting, as well as a linking, of hearts and minds.

But blogging has its merits, as well as its downside.

I have tried to be as honest as this kind of forum can permit me to be. Being too vague or general produces superficial posts - and if this blog will only let people wade and romp about in the shallow waters of my life, then I might as well "close shop."

The choice is mine: blogging has required of me an investment of my time, effort, and spiritual energy.

Which is the real reason why I want to talk about lurkers on this post.

I never knew there was such a thing called "lurking" on the internet. Eventually I did find out what it means, and I was somewhat amused at the definition of the term.

A lurker, in internet jargon, refers to someone who reads or observes an ongoing discussion without participating, as in an internet newsgroup, chatroom, or blog.

The term is quite appropriately used, in my humble opinion.

Dictionary.com defines the verb lurk this way:

1. to lie or wait in concealment, as a person in ambush; remain in or around a place secretly or furtively.

2. to go furtively; slink, steal.

3. to exist unperceived or unsuspected.


Some synonyms for this word are: lurk, skulk, sneak, prowl.

There really are no hard and fast rules on cyberspace.

Facts are being twisted all the time, copyright laws being violated; infringement is a day to day occurrence... identity theft is a real possibility.

So who can effectively act as an internet police to make sure that privacy is safeguarded? No one, really.

However, I am of the firm belief that the internet can be redeemed... used for the glory of God to promote His cause and propagate His message.

That is one main reason I have continued to keep this blog going. I maintain it in the hope that visitors who end up reading the words I have written and viewing the photographs I have taken will be blessed and encouraged. Each time I put up a post I do so believing that someone needs to read what I have written and hoping that anyone visiting my blog will leave refreshed and lifted up.

It would be such a blessing to me if the readers who come would leave even just a line of comment once in a while, just for the connection and personal touch. I'm not concerned about those who come once or twice and never return, I am referring to one or two persons who visit my blog place up to five or six times a day, and after all these months, have never bothered to introduce himself, or herself, to me.

Having said all that, I do need to make myself clear. No one is being blamed for choosing to remain hidden or anonymous. That is a freedom we all are entitled to enjoy.

And having made the decision to go public on a blog, I am well aware of the fact that certain consequences follow. To have "lurkers" on one's little corner of the cyberspace is inevitable.

And I am not really after comments per se. After all, to receive comments is not the reason this blog exists. But to be honest, it warms my heart to know how people feel. A comment box is like some kind of a dialogue box, a venue for giving feedback, a forum that allows conversation to take place.

There is a time to be silent, but there is also a time to stand up and be recognized. I believe due courtesy, even on cyberspace, is still possible.

Surely there must be a reason for the frequent visits. It would be good to know.

The picture above is borrowed from a website that showed up when I googled the phrase, "standing on the outside looking in."

A lurker is like someone who stands outside the window of my home, looks inside, goes around the yard, looks inside another window, observes what is going on... and then leaves without saying a word!

I must admit that sometimes I get a creepy feeling.

But it is a fear that I need to let go of, something that I have to entrust to God.

If people aren't revealing who they are or what they feel, then it has to be the least of my worries. In humility, I need to let go of certain expectations... enjoy what is there, not focus on what isn't there!

I have become friends with a number of wonderful people through my blog. They have shared what is on their heart by initially leaving a comment or two, and in many cases, the friendship has extended already to exchanging letters via email, and even sending gifts through the postal service.

In a place as open as the world wide web, I can only continue to blog with confidence knowing that it is my God who puts a hedge of protection around me.

May every part of this blog be covered by the hand of God. May He station sentinels to protect it from malicious intent. May readers come frequently only because they are drawn to words of life and truth.

In the name of Jesus I break the power of any demonic scheme or demonic assignment over this blog. I declare that this blog is used for the sole purpose of being a redemptive agent in the murky and turbulent waters of our world.

It won't be long, though. Jesus is coming soon. Maranatha!

The thief comes to steal, kill and destroy...
Jeus came that we may have life, and have it abundantly!

I will not be deterred or intimidated. I will continue to write posts with a sense of purpose.

To anyone who happens to land in this place and takes offense at what is written here, I say, "Go in peace."

To all readers, I say:

"You are welcome in this place. May you find it to be a safe place where you are nurtured. May you experience God's healing presence here."

May all visitors to this blog come to have a taste of the abundant life that flows freely from the heart of Jesus!

Thank you for stopping by.

photo source

A Dangerous Prayer (Guest Post)

Cold Blue by John Owen

Today I have invited Linda Owen of Absolute Grace to do a guest post.

Linda describes her journey in God's grace as "...somewhat long and convoluted. From Colorado mountain girl, to Navy wife, homeschool (and always a) mom for our daughters, Joy, Hope, and Grace, Sailor and Navy Chief, retired veteran, and freelance whatever... my only consistent identity is who I am in Christ."

She is married to Navy veteran John Owen who "journals extensively about the Lord, Scriptures, and this and that, and loves photography."

The photograph above is taken from John's photo collection, one of the main features of Linda's blog. I visit her site often to be inspired by the lovely pictures taken from John's artistic perspective!

Linda has become a precious blog friend. Although we've never met face to face, our hearts beat for the same desire - that is, to live a life that honors the King of Kings. Her writing reflects the main theme of her blog: giving grace to those who hear.

I for one never leave her blog without having received a fresh impartation of God's grace!

Below is one of her recent blog entries which she has graciously allowed to be posted on this blog. Those of you have been following my blog for sometime know that I am quite passionate about God's kingdom reign in my life. I agree with every word she has written and I'm sure you will all be blessed by her words.

After reading it, you may want to visit her blog and discover for yourself the tiny nuggets of grace hidden within its pages.

A Dangerous Prayer
January 27, 2010 by absolutegrace

“Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is heaven.”

- Matthew 6:10

How well do I know these words?

How often do I pray/say them?

But do I mean them?

Paul David Tripp suggests how dangerous these words may be–to my little kingdom:

“There are things I want in my life, and I not only want them, but I know how, when, and where I want them! I want my life to be comfortable… my schedule to be unobstructed and predictable… people around me to esteem and appreciate me…control over the situations and relationships in my life… I don’t want to suffer. I don’t want to leave without…. What I am saying is that I want my kingdom to come and my will to be done.

Thy kingdom come is a dangerous prayer, for it means the death of your own sovereignty. It means your life will be shaped by the will of Another. It means that you will experience the messiness, discomfort, and difficulty of God’s refining grace. It means surrendering the center of your universe to the One who alone deserves to be there. It means loving God above all else and your neighbor as yourself. It means experiencing the freedom that can only be found when God breaks you bondage to You! It means finally living for the one glory that is truly glorious, the glory of God.

Thy kingdom come, are words of surrender, words of protection, words of grace that can only be prayed by those who’ve been delivered by the Redeemer from…the kingdom of self.”

Paul David Tripp, Whiter than Snow: Mediations on Sin and Mercy. Crossway Books, 2008. Wheaton, IL. pps 61-62.

Unlike many governments in place today, God’s kingdom is not one to be feared.

God’s kingdom is a reign of grace (A.W. Pink). The ruler and King is Jesus, full of grace and truth, “blessed and only Sovereign, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.” (I Tim. 6:15) .

His kingdom is also a reign of love. “But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us!“ (Rom. 8:37). ”There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love. We love, because He first loved us.” ( I John 4:18,19)

And so much more:

“The kingdom of God is righteousness, and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.” Romans 14:17

”Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.” Matthew 6:33

“For He delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.” Colossians 1:13, 14

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A dangerous prayer?

Yes, to my self-driven kingdom of one.

But more so, a comforting prayer, as I surrender to the One who loves perfectly; He became poor, took on my griefs and sorrows, died, and rose again! I can trust Him.

Why do I fear, when His kingdom is the safest place to be?

Your kingdom come, your will be done,

on earth as it is heaven.

Blog Anniversary!

Crown of Beauty turned two years old last week!

This means that this blog has been around for 24 months... or 104 weeks... or 730 days!

This really calls for a celebration! During that span of time, I have posted nearly 200 blog entries, and have come to know very many beautiful fellow blog authors on this virtual place they call "Blog Land."

On February 7, 2008, I wrote my very first post entitled What's In a Name?. It gives a brief introduction to this weblog, and why I named it Crown of Beauty.

To be a blog writer was never in my wildest dreams. I was not really an internet person, and two years ago, I did not even know that there was such a thing as a blog.

My husband Ernie and I were living in Chiang Mai, Thailand at the time this blog was born in February 2008. We had 24 hours free internet access at the university flat where we lived, and in the evenings, after dinner, we had plenty of time on our hands.

A friend named Jenny encouraged me to begin a blog. Thinking one had to be a computer techie to be a blog writer, I had a hundred and one reasons as to why blogging was not for me.

After overcoming my initial hesitation and reluctance, I discovered the joys of having a blog. It has given me a wonderful opportunity to put up important signposts - for myself, and for my loved ones, those who are interested enough to know what's going on in my life. I have family and friends who I know are regular readers of my blog. The signposts serve as important reminders to me of how far I have gone; they are also for my loved ones to follow.

A blog has also helped me to tell about my spiritual journey, and is therefore a tremendous aid to "soulmaking." Theresa of Avila described the soul as an interior castle that most people never explore. And she is so right.

Keeping an online journal has helped me to be disciplined in writing down my thoughts in an organized way. Just as turning a faucet allows water to flow, so has writing a blog helped my thoughts to flow out. My flashbacks have helped me see the events of my life from a different perspective, and given me understanding for my present, and hope for my future.

In many ways, this blog has indeed helped me to keep track of my soul's condition.

I have not made it my aim to have too many blogs on my dashboard, for practical reasons. As in real life, I can only relate meaningfully to a few close friends at a time. The rest of them end up being mere acquaintances. I look at my blog friendships in the same way.



So, on this my second blog anniversary, I want to thank all my blog friends who have encouraged, inspired and uplifted me, by sharing their lives, by regularly visiting my blog, reading what I have to say, and leaving behind heartfelt responses in spite of their busy schedules.

The beautiful frame pictured above is a gift created for me by Katie of Hope is Calling. She is one blog friend that I truly appreciate.

In the final analysis, I have come to realize that maintaining a blog is a give and take proposition. If you want good blog friendships, then take the initiative by being a good blog friend yourself. Most blogs I have visited and commented on have usually returned the favor. On a few occasions I have been flatly ignored, and I can only guess at the possible reason.

It doesn't matter to me at all! I can really say that the Christian blog world is a gold mine of wonderful people!

This past year 2009, as I was grieving the death of my husband, it was this blog that helped me to be in touch with my own feelings, and gave me countless precious opportunities to process my pain. My blog friends were always ready with their hearts wide open to understand what I was going through, and to receive me into their lives.

In His wisdom, God knew that I would need this venue to help Him get through me in my difficult hours. So the real honor as I celebrate my blog's second year belongs to the One Who created me, and has designed me, and has given me a beautiful destiny and purpose for living!

He has placed so much hope in my heart for the journey ahead of me!

I give glory to my God, my King, my Creator...for the person that I have become and am becoming. May this blog continue to be a channel of blessing to anyone who visits, and may God always be honored and glorified by the words that I write here!

A "dog day afternoon" at the Global City

Me and my friend Bolet with three of her eight dogs!
Taken on January 24, 2010

Encouragement

"You can do it!"

Encouragement.

We all need it. In a world that is starving, crying out for kindness, even just a tiny drop of encouragement will go a long way.

This life is not an easy journey. Daily we face challenges, hurdles, disappointments, frustration, failures.

Broken dreams, unmet expectations.

Unexpected reversals.

Financial, health, and relational issues.

Deprivation.

Pain.

Crippling loss.

We would have become weary and given up, thrown in the towel, so to speak, were it not for a kind gesture, even just a random act, an encouraging word... a word in season that someone spoke to us.

This is one of the verses in Scripture that God sent to speak life to me at a time when I was just too weary and about to let go.

The Lord God has given me the tongue of the learned,
that I should know how to speak
a word in season to him who is weary.
He awakens me morning by morning.
He awakens my ear to hear as the learned.

– Isaiah 50:4

These past years God has led me to rediscover my true identity, and my true God given worth. It has been such a life-changing turn of events.

Because of this, I have decided that I will be God's mouthpiece to this weary generation, whenever possible, to speak a word in season to him who is weary.

And I appreciate those who do the same!




Maryleigh over at Blue Cotton Memory gave me a blog award, right on the first day of August!



I love blog awards because they encourage my heart. It is a message that says, "You're doing great, keep it up!"

That is why I never take any blog award that is passed on to me lightly. I acknowledge the giver, and recognize the effort and the kind thoughts that go with the gift.

While searching for a suitable picture to go with this simple post, I stumbled across this blog:

The Discovery


Wow! I must say I got a double encouragement today - from the award and from this new blog that I just discovered.

There are just too many good blogs out there, and I always have to resist adding another new blog to my ever expanding blog roll. This is because I want to be "truly present" for the blog friends whose lives I follow on their sites. But this new discovery, aptly entitled as such, will certainly be a welcome addition to my blog reading list.

Well, never say coincidence.

There really is no such thing as a chance encounter, only divine appointment.


Thank you, Maryleigh for encouraging my heart.

Again, I give my Creator all the credit, all the glory, for I am His workmanship.

In receiving this award, I understand that I have to pass it on to 15 new blogs I have recently enjoyed reading. The truth is, I don't have that number... so I will modify the mechanics a bit and will pass on this award to only seven others, in no particular order:

Christy Rose at http://thesecretlifeofanamericanwifeandmom.blogspot.com/

Saija at http://saija.blogspot.com/

Jennifer at http://jenniferdorhauer.blogspot.com/

Cory at http://californiaisoms.blogspot.com/

Katie at http://hopeiscalling.blogspot.com/

Julie at http://jewelsightings.blogspot.com/

Elsie at http://epogle.blogspot.com/

Have a blessed week, my dear blog friends!