In Whom We Live and Have our Being

For in Him we live

and move

and have our being...

- Acts 18:28

Today marks a very special day for our family. Two months ago, my third grandson was born, under unexpected and unplanned circumstances.

Outwardly I was peaceful and calm, but God knows my heart was filled with anxiety.

I was afraid, but I never gave my fear a voice. 

There really was no other choice for me but to trust Him. I knew He was God all wise, and completely trustworthy, good, and all powerful.

The combination of those four facets of His innumerable characteristics - all wise, all powerful, completely trustworthy, and good - was what set my heart at rest.

Worry wasn't going to change anything... therefore, resting my case in the One who holds the whole world in His hands was the best option available to me.

From Day 1, we saw Him at work.

He led us to the right doctors, both for my dear daughter-in-law Chosen One, and the neonatal specialist for the baby who was born more than a month before his due date. 

Joyful One was the name God impressed on my heart. And indeed the joy of the Lord was this little one's strength.

Friends and family rallied to our support.


Father God did not fail me in my trust of Him.

But how does one get to the point of knowing Someone who is unseen and seemingly distant?

This is the great mystery that I still cannot fathom.

The day I turned the throne of my heart over to Him 41 years ago was the day my heart to heart relationship with Him began. His heart is not hidden in some dark church cubicle... He reaches out in love, wanting to be known, wanting to be discovered for who He really is.

Yesterday, my daughter and I celebrated her birthday in a very quiet, and simple way. We went to church earlier than usual, and returned home for a special mid-morning breakfast.

As I thought of my beloved child, my only daughter, many sweet chapters from her growing up years came back to mind:

the day she was born... her early years... the formation of her obedient heart, mostly from her own responses to the way her father and I brought her up.

I see the young woman she is becoming today, and my heart overflows with joy and thanksgiving.

One story from her childhood stood out among the ones I remembered. She was always asking me questions... profound questions, many of which I have forgotten by now. But a question she asked, when she was just about six years old struck me then, even as it does me now in my remembering.

She asked me one day, "Mama... what will we do in heaven forever?"

My answer to such a profound question was followed by another profound question from this little girl, whose heart was being stirred to know more about eternal things, too wonderful for her little heart to grasp.

And yet, in that God moment, heavenly Father met us both and supplied an answer He alone could have provided. (Read the full post here.)

Abba Father whispered, "It will take forever to get to know all of Me."

Remembering that day truly warms my heart.

I arrived in Manila two weeks ago, and my return flight was scheduled for this morning. Within that brief two-week stay here, I had two main items on my agenda: to spend time with my gradeschool best friend who lives in the US but was in town for the death of her father, and to be with my daughter Obedient One on her birthday.

Today would have been the perfect day to return to my home city. Tonight there is a special Christmas dinner for our Monday night Bible study group hosted by my sister in law Sue. I had also looked forward to being in three other events this week.

An unexpected situation comes up and messes with my well laid out plans. A tropical cyclone hit our islands Saturday, and is moving so slowly that it is forecast to exit our nation only by Thursday, four days from now. Right this very moment it is grinding over the Bicol region and will be making another landfall south of Manila sometime within today.

Understandably, flights to many cities are cancelled. So here I am still... 

The past days I have been pensive...  listening to worship music, to the Word of Promise audio Bible, and pleading with God to cause this powerful storm's path to re-curve, and for its strength and intensity to weaken and dissipate. He is the all powerful One, He could very easily command this storm to dissolve, and never hit our country.

We've had enough devastation from storms, and we certainly do not need another one at this point.

I recall some of the past events of my life when I had also knelt before God, asking Him to intervene... or to protect... or to provide a way out... or to heal.

Trusting in His promises... but even more than His promises... trusting in His very character.

Many thoughts have entered my heart these past days... mostly thoughts about God's character.

He is a multi-faceted God... a God of many names. 

In the 40 years that I have walked with Him, I still feel I do not know Him enough.

I want to know Him more.

In a time of utter dependence on Him, when my dear grandson was about to be born, I asked Him for mercy, compassion, and protection.

I have asked that of Him many times before. Praise God, that particular prayer was granted.

Emboldened, this weekend I have asked Him again... yes, for the protection of my family and our homes, but mostly for the sake of my land... and my fellowmen.

The super typhoon did not re-curve... but I am thankful that it did lessen in force and intensity. Nevertheless, it did, and is still doing, much damage to the areas lying in its path. But, it could have been so much worse...

So as I am praising Him, I am still praying... praying... pleading... pleading...

Now my prayer is, Please God, do not let the storm hit Metro Manila... just let it go through the bodies of water between our islands as it exits.

We feel so vulnerable and helpless in the midst of a storm... any kind of storm. Even as I write these words, there are already occasional gusts of wind blowing outside, indicating the storm is somewhere near.

The One who can calm the storm is also near, my mind knows that ... but my heart needs reassurance.

So thankful am I for Jessica King's beautiful song... the Father is speaking peace and truth to my heart: Sometimes it takes a storm, to calm the storm within.

Abba Father never leaves a prayer unanswered. Some requests are granted... and then again... there are some prayers that are not answered the way we want.

In His wisdom, He always knows what is best. In His goodness, He gives more than what is asked for. 

Again, it takes another layer of trust in God's wisdom, power, goodness. and trustworthiness.


In the events of the past days, I hear God saying,

I am Jehovah Shammah... the God who is near. You are never alone in what you are going through. You are not forgotten, you are not abandoned, you are not forsaken. I am with you... always!

I'm doing a blog series on the names of God for my third grandson, Joyful One. As he turns two months old today, I am ready to speak words of blessing to him. I call upon Jehovah Shammah, The God Who Is There... to touch this little one's life.

Joyful One, as you turn two months old this very day, my prayers for you are being offered to the God who is standing near. He is near... He is not distant. He is the God who reveals who He is to those who hunger and thirst and long to know Him more.

Below are excerpts of the conversation I had with Abba Father when I came to Him recently as my Jehovah Shammah... recorded here for your benefit, dear grandson... that someday you may read them for yourself, and know in your heart, that this heartfelt prayer for you to know God a little bit more with each passing day, has indeed become true in your own life.

Dear grandson, I pray that you will know God as your very own Jehovah Shammah.

My Abba Father,

You are Jehovah Shammah the God Who is standing near.

You are near, not distant.

You care... and your compassion is ever within my reach... 

Your comfort is real, not imagined.

You desire to be involved and included in the affairs, the events of my life.

Jehovah Shammah, You are God whose eyes are ever on me.

Your thoughts for me are always meant to promote my welfare...

You are not indifferent...

You are warm, not cold...

You want me to know that You are relevant...

You can relate to what I am going through.

You speak to my heart, not to my mind.

You feel, You hear, You see.

You stand near.

You guide, You lead, You show the way... 

the way in... the way out... the way through.

You sing to me Your songs in my night seasons,

Your love comforts and sets my heart at rest.

You reveal Yourself to me...

And the more I know You, the brighter the light that shines in the darkness.

You are multi-faceted God. 

Every attribute, every facet I know of You makes You shine brighter in my understanding

and pushes back the darkness of confusion, self-centeredness, and wrong assumptions.

You are indeed the God who's standing near.

In You I live... and have my being.

From my prayer journal, October 28, 2014, 3 a.m.

I love you, my dear Joyful One. May these words be your very own words someday.

Love always

Nana

Joyful One, at seven weeks

Where can I go from Your Spirit?

Or where can I flee from Your presence?

If I ascend into heaven, You are there.

If I take the wings of the morning,

And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,

Even there Your hand shall lead me,

And Your right hand shall hold me.

If I say, "Surely the darkness shall fall on me,"

Even the night shall be light about me;

Indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You.

But the night shines as the day;

The darkness and the light are both alike to You.

- Psalm 139:7-12

A mini cake for Joyful One...

A mini cake for Joyful One, from his Aunt Obedient One...

And three special songs for Joyful One:

Immortal, Invisible, God Only Wise
by Walter Smith

Immortal, invisible, God only wise
In light inaccessible hid from our eyes
Most blessed, most glorious, the Ancient of Days
Almighty, victorious, Thy great name we praise

Unresting, unhasting, and silent as light
Nor wanting, nor wasting, Thou rulest in might
Thy justice like mountains high soaring above
Thy clouds which are fountains of goodness and love

To all life Thou givest to both great and small
In all life Thou livest the true life of all
We blossom and flourish as leaves on the tree
And wither and perish, but naught changeth Thee

Great Father of Glory, pure Father of Light
Thine angels adore Thee, all veiling their sight;
All laud we would render, O help us to see
'Tis only the splendor of light hideth Thee.


Where Could I Go from Your Spirit
by Kelly Willard

Where could I go from Your Spirit
How could I hide from Your eyes
Why would I wander away from You
Knowing that You are so wise
If I take the wings of the morning
And dwell in the depths of the sea
Even the darkness hides nothing from You
And with Your hand You will lead me

For You did knit me together
Even before I was born
I will confess You and praise You
You are my wonderful Lord












First Month - If God Be For Us... Jehovah Sabaoth

Daughter...

touching the hem of His garment...

For thus says the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel:

"In returning and rest you shall be saved;

In quietness and confidence shall be your strength."

- Isaiah 30:15

The month of November has become such a special month for me - it brings so many tender memories, both old and recent.

November 1 is the day our extended family in Bacolod gather to remember our loved ones who are already in heaven.

November 2 is my husband Ernie's birthday.

November 5 is my second born son's birthday.

November 13 is my second grandson's birthday.

November 19 is the day I remember the day my own mother passed away 29 years ago.

November 23 is the day Abba Father called my beloved Ernie home, six years ago.

Not only that... on the 8th of this month, my third grandson Joyful One, turned one month old.

On the 25th, two days after I arrived here in Metro Manila, my gradeschool best friend Cynthia, and I spent a half day together at Rockwell in Makati. She resides in the US and was in town for a few days for the death of her dad.. I hope that even in a small way, I was able to comfort her in her sorrow.

Just today, the last day of the month, my maternal first cousins and I and our families had a family reunion, something I had long wanted to happen. The last time we were together was in 2006, eight years ago.

And on the 21st and 22nd of this month, we had the More Than Enough Women's Conference, hosted by our church. It was at this conference that God spoke deeply to my heart... making it the defining event for this month that is about to end.

These past four months I sense that I have entered a different season. Again, words are not adequate to express what I mean. I sense a quietness... a hiddenness... a gentleness... but at the same time I sense an inner restlessness.

In my sacred journey, I am standing at a crossroads.

There is something stirring inside of me that I can't quite define.

A longing for fresh truth, a hunger for something deeper... something more.

Not in any physical, or material sense, but there seems to be a dull ache, an inner emptiness that is longing to be filled with the deep things of God.

Looking around my home, the rooms, the closets full of stuff, the bookshelves lined with hundreds of books, the big crates of things from my earlier years waiting to be sorted out...

I realize many of them are really not important anymore.

This life will soon come to an end, and my heart cries to live only a life that matters for eternity.

I had planned to return to Manila on the second week of this month. But a Voice within urged me to stay for the More Than Enough conference; it was something I could not afford to miss.

When Rica Bonifacio began to tell her story on Friday afternoon, my heart was gripped.

She spoke about the woman who had a flow of blood for twelve years. This has been my favorite gospel story. Each time I heard it, or read it, it never failed to infuse a fresh encouragement into my heart.

Rica said that the first time she encountered this story many years ago, she was that woman with the hemorrhage; beautiful on the outside, but bleeding on the inside. And it drove her to her knees... gave her fresh hope after she responded in genuine humility, touched the hem of Jesus' garments, and she was healed.

As I sat at that conference listening to Rica's words, I was having my own personal dialogue with Jesus.

That woman did not even have a name. She had no identity. She was considered defiled by her bleeding... and therefore, she was an outcast, shunned by society. She had to live her life in the dark shadows, her presence never missed, her voice never heard. 

But what touches my heart the most is the way this woman never gave up hope. She used up all her resources going from doctor to doctor... and finally when all seemed lost, she hears of Jesus who is passing that way. And she heads for Capernaum, commentaries say it was a good 30 miles from where she lived.

While the rest of the people thronged around Jesus... she purposely crawls behind him to touch the tassel of His shawl, hoping to steal a miracle, and then to quietly disappear into the crowd.

Her faith did not fail her.

Jesus stops for her, not at all perturbed by this seeming interruption, and for her sake, asks the question that she alone can answer.

Who touched me?

The woman knew the question was aimed at her... and a surge of confidence empowers her to come out in the open. She no longer cared that the others around her would hear what she had done.

In humility she admits her need of healing, and in doing so declares her faith in Jesus, the Life-giver. In response, He calls her, "Daughter."

My tears are falling profusely at this point. I no longer hear what Rica is saying.

Instead I hear Jesus asking, "Who touched me?" A question addressed to me personally. 

I heard my Savior saying to me:
Admit your need of Me, in this season of your life when you are not sure of your future direction... 
wondering if there is still any big assignment for you... 
asking if you are taking the right steps... 
just quietly looking at your life... your past, your present, and your future... 
and thinking of many other unspoken concerns weighing your heart down...
Admit that you feel like that woman crawling in the shadows... 
longing for a special touch from Me.

It was a defining moment for me, really.

I admit it Lord... I need You. 
There is longing deep inside for me to live the second half of my life with meaning, and with purpose. 
A recent event has wounded my heart Lord.  
Remove that arrow embedded in my heart by the Father of Lies, 
a tiny arrow that has caused my heart to bleed... 
I need You to restore my true identity... 
I admit that I need You to speak truth to Me. 
And yes, I admit I have reached out often to touch the tassels of Your shawl.

tassels, or tzitziyot

The tassels of Jesus' shawl stood for His authority and identity, His power, His stature.

People thronged around him... unaware of who He really was, the Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel.

Most of them didn't really care.

They honored Him with their lips.

Their worship was contrived and perfunctory.

But what about you, who do you say I am? Jesus asks me.

I have no doubt... You are the Christ... the Messiah... my Savior... my Healer... my Lord.

His words to the woman... were His words to Rica... and to me as well:

Daughter, your faith has made you well...

Jesus honors the woman for her faith. Restores her identity... not just any common identity... but Daughter.

A daughter of the king...  a royal identity... a noble status.

Thank You, Jesus for giving me a new name.

I name this month, Daughter.

I arrived here in Manila a week ago, the 23rd of the month... a memorable day for it is the day my husband passed away six years ago.

But with the encounter I had with Jesus just two days earlier still fresh on my heart, I knew that a season was coming to an end...

My heart is being prepared for something new.

In returning and rest you shall be saved...

In quietness and confidence shall be your strength.

These words resonate within my heart, as this beautiful, gentle month comes to an end. 

Good-bye November, and I thank you. You were so good to bring me many old and new beautiful memories to warm my heart for years to come. 

December... don't go by too quickly. Take your time... stay a while. I want to savor slowly what Abba Father has in store.

The Promise
Daybreak in Central Virginia, USA
Taken in December 2013

Closing the Door

... go into your inner room, close your door,  and pray.

- Matthew 6;6

Something soft, beautiful, and gentle is happening - within and around me.

As always, it is difficult to put into words. Like a snapshot that doesn't do justice to the real thing, my words are inadequate to express what is going on.

Nevertheless, here's my feeble attempt to share, that you may have a glimpse into what God is doing in my heart and in my circumstances.

There has been what I'd like to call a holy quiet permeating the air I breathe. 

So grateful that Abba Father never gives up on me. He awakens me at the usual early hour, way before dawn... But lately I have pleaded with Him to forgive me for the many times I have not heeded the call.

There are still too many leftover things from my past that need sorting out, discarding, re-arranging. It can only be tackled one day at a time.


Another Level

These days I realize that I have entered yet another level in my destiny... and Abba is definitely preparing me for something new. He's removing blocks, clearing up my understanding.

It's a pruning of sorts, a simplifying of priorities, a descent.

Abba's word for me in September was Seek first My kingdom... and My righteousness... and all these things will be given unto you.

Father says, I have created you for greater things. Know Me, know yourself.

I know that I have entered what Richard Rohr calls the "second half of life" many years ago, but I am understanding it more fully now.

"In the second half of life, people have less power to infatuate you. But they also have much less power to control or hurt you."

What people say or think about me don't matter so much to me anymore, provided my heart is truly clean before God.

Abba says, Let go of those things, entrust them to me, my daughter... I will take care of them.

Yes, I do sense an inner movement toward intimacy, authenticity, acceptance, gratitude, humility.

He is, and always will be, my top priority. I cannot be preoccupied with anything that derails me from His goal for me in this next season of my life.

Doors

These past days I have been thinking a lot about doors. On several occasions, the subject matter of closing the door behind me has come up - in my devotional readings, and in my casual conversation with friends. 

Go into your inner room... close the door... and pray. Matthew 6:6.

Before Jesus raised Jairus' daughter back to life, He put the tumultuous crowd outside, and allowed no one but his three disciples Peter, James, and John, and the parents of the child, to go with Him inside the room where the child was.

google image

...He said to the ruler of the synagogue, "Do not be afraid; only believe." And He permitted no one to follow Him except Peter, James, and John the brother of James. Then He came to the house of the ruler of the synagogue, and saw a tumult and those who wept and wailed loudly. When He came in, He said to them, "Why make this commotion and weep? The child is not dead, but sleeping."

And they ridiculed Him. But when He had put them all outside, He took the father and the mother of the child, and those who were with Him, and entered where the child was lying. Then He took the child by the hand, and said to her, "Talitha, cumi," which is translated, "Little girl, I say to you, arise." Immediately the girl arose and walked...  
- Mark 5:36-42

In the account of the widow and the jars of oil, Elisha the prophet commanded her to borrow empty vessels from her neighbors, go inside her house, shut the door behind her, and in the presence of her two sons, pour oil into all the jars she had borrowed.

google image

So she went from him and shut the door behind her and her sons, who brought the vessels to her; and she poured it out. Now it came to pass, when the vessels were full, that she said to her son, "Bring me another vessel."

And he said to her, "There is not another vessel." So the oil ceased. Then she came and told the man of God. And he said, "Go, sell the oil and pay your debt; and you and your sons live on the rest." 
- 2 Kings 4:3-7

The common thread: I need to go in and close the door behind me, that the tumultuous voices of the enemy may not reach me. 

Close the door behind me, for faith and unbelief cannot go together.

Turn your back on flattery, useless chatter, non-essentials. 

God does His work in the secret places, hidden from the eyes of those who only honor God with their lips but whose hearts are far from Him.

The mighty miracles of heaven are birthed in the secret place of true worship and humble prayer.

A Weak Spot

That my bonsai collection was stolen recently holds a subtle lesson for me. The enemy has gained access, I was complacent and had not been watching and praying.

There was a weak spot in my gateway... So today, the new, higher gate is being installed. I have been alerted to the schemes of the enemy.

God is my protector and my defense, but I have to make sure the gates to my heart are secure, keeping out unbelief, complacency, presumptuousness, offense... and all other things that Abba Father brings to my attention.

Words written by Bryan Purtle that have gripped my heart:

One of the reasons the people of God rarely make it into the life of prayer is that they seek to establish devotional lives in a religious manner, without real desire or holy intention, and they only find the strength for little spurts of reading and prayer. They lack the faith and hunger for God sufficient enough to inspire them to close the door on life, on people, on food, on errands, on entertainment, and even on ministry to others. But Jesus said we've got to "close the door" if ever we wish to enter into the heights of God-filled devotion. Are you closing the door on the world everyday, enough to engage the living God in secret? The powers of darkness will use any means to distract us from this place, and if we haven't sufficiently "closed the door" they will have their way with us... It's the secret life of prayer that lays the foundation for an abiding life in all settings.... Oh, friend, He will meet you there. He will open up the Scriptures to you. He will shower you with the waters of holy love, purify your soul with fire from above, still your heart and teach you His glorious ways. Once you have broken through the morass and clutter of life, the secret place will become your favored place, and you will wonder why you had neglected it for lesser company or lesser things.... (source)

Precious lessons, learning things the costly way. But it is worth it all.

My desire is to see things with my spiritual understanding... and then to respond in obedience. 

Spiritual things are spiritually discerned.

A Birthday Blessing for Second Grandson

My second grandson Full of Hope turns four years old today.

I am praying for my generations... my children... my grandchildren. May my legacy of faith live on in them.

Four years ago we battled for the life of this little one. 

But today, four years later he is healthy, intelligent, inquisitve. He is a learner.

I pray for you today, dear grandson, that you will learn to put up strong boundaries around your heart, that it may not be easily accessed by the enemy.

Abba Father, teach this little one to hunger and thirst for You... to long for the things that please You. 

Teach him to know what it means to close the door of his heart to unbelief and fear.

Father, he has a full life ahead of Him, but the world in which he lives is enemy territory. Be the protector of His heart, Abba. 

Be the door to His heart, Abba Father. Teach Him at this early age that behind that closed door is a secret place where He can meet with You often, to receive strength, peace, joy, and hope!

If God Be For Us...

A Mighty Fortress

screenshot image source

What then shall we say to these things?

If God is for us, who can be against us?

He who did not spare His own Son, 

but delivered Him up for us all,

how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?

Who shall bring a charge against God's elect?

It is God who justifies,Who is he who condemns?

It is Christ who died, and furthermore is also risen,

who is even at the right hand of God,

who also makes intercession for us.

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?

Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, 

or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?

As it is written:

"For Your sake we are killed all day long;

We are accounted as sheep for the slaughter."

Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors

through Him who loved us.

For I am persuaded that neither death nor life,

nor angels nor principalities nor powers,

nor things present nor things to come,

nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing,

shall be able to separate us from the love of God 

which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

- Romans 8:31-19

As I had written in my end of month post for September, living alone has made me aware of many things. My time is mostly my own, in a manner of speaking. This has given me so much room to think, to evaluate choices I have made in the past, to look at the past years with perspective and understanding. 

Many of the things Ernie and I have accumulated no longer seem so important. Only a very few things are valuable to me now.

On November 1, I arrived home at about 10 p.m. and discovered that my front gate was open, as well as the gate leading to my garden. I immediately knew that an intruder had gotten into my premises, and before long, I discovered that my bonsai collection of mini roses, jade plants, as well as Chosen One's succulents have been stolen. My bonsai collection is over fifteen years old, some of them planted in beautiful celadon antique pottery. 

Because they have been on a special table in my garden for years, clearly visible to passersby, it never occurred to me that anyone would have the audacity to actually enter my garden and take them.

My first response was to thank God that nothing else of value was taken. And above all, that the intruders did not break in and enter my home. I praised God for His protection. 

My bonsai collection was precious to me primarily because of the fifteen plus years (or more) of care and nurture that I had given them. The joy of seeing new mini roses blooming every week of the year has been worth the little amount of time it has taken for me to look after them every day.

The tiled table for my collection stood empty and forlorn the next morning. It was also my bird feeder table. Without the pots, the birds did not touch the bird seed that I had scattered for them. It must have looked strange to them, bird seed on the table without any of the potted plants that used to give them shade and perching spots.

There was no point in being angry, or sad at my loss. I have taken new cuttings from my garden and will soon be starting a new bonsai collection. This time, I will keep them in my small back garden, away from prying eyes and eager hands. I will shop around for beautiful pottery for them.

I also decided to change my low front gate. My new higher wrought iron gate will be installed this week. Much as I hate having padlocks, I have no choice but to use one for the new gate.

My real treasure is in heaven where thieves do not break in and steal.

Yes, among my many realizations is that only a few things can be considered valuable in this life. Even the nature of my friendships is changing. Friends who I thought were real friends seem to be drifting away... was it something I had done or not done... or maybe something I said, or didn't say?

Dear friends I treasure have also started attending different churches, so even the dynamic of seeing my friends at church on Sunday mornings is changing.

These changes sadden me, but I understand that it is part of the end times scenario. Many will be offended... love will grow cold...

It is a scheme of the enemy... to divide and conquer. But in this year of kingdom advance, one prophetic word that has spoken deeply to my spirit is this:

Now is not the time to give up on your covenant relationships within the body of Christ. You have been tempted to cut ties and retreat. It is in the context of relationship, however, that you will be blessed beyond your wildest expectation. Prepare to inherit riches as you reunify with your brothers and sisters. (Melissa Flores, Defining Words)

Now is not the time to give up.

This is such a timely word for me.

And if there is anything these realizations are teaching me, it is that God alone is the solid rock on which I stand, a mighty fortress, a bulwark never failing. 

A bulwark is a defensive wall, a rampart.

Important things, events, and persons in our lives come and go... but God, Almighty God, is a bulwark... unchanging... constant... the same yesterday, today, and forever.

One name of God that I really love is Jehovah Sabaoth, Lord of Hosts or Angel Armies. "Hosts" is a military term that appears more than 200 times in the Bible. Jehovah Sabaoth is the name God uses when He goes to war in behalf of His people.

One clear example of this is when David, face to face with Goliath that mighty Philistine giant, said:

You come to me with a sword, with a spear, and with a javelin.

But I come to you in the name of the LORD of hosts,

the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied.

- 1 Samuel 17:45

As Jehovah Sabaoth God has mighty angelic armies at His command. And this God is on my side. He is for me. His name is a strong tower. He is called a Defender of widows in Psalm 68:5.

Look at this amazing passage:

... you... will not remember the reproach of your widowhood anymore.

For your Maker is your Husband.

The LORD of hosts is His name;
And your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel,
He is called the God of the whole earth.

- Isaiah 54:5

As a widow, I have often felt so vulnerable. But this passage clearly says that my Maker is my husband. These lines are so personal, so real. The One who created me is the only One who can love me, protect me, and care for me. A woman's earthly husband is an imperfect reflection of her true heavenly husband. To redeem means to defend or to rescue from evil. Jehovah Sabaoth stands ready to fight for my cause! 

Knowing all this gives me such unshakable security and assurance in my God. Whatever circumstances I find myself in, Jehovah Sabaoth is fighting for me. Therefore the victory is sure.

My third grandson, Joyful One is one month old today! Just as I had done with my two other grandsons, it is a privilege to offer a special prayer for him as he turns a month older.

I woke up this morning with this verse on my heart:

If God be for us, who can be against us?

That passage from Romans 8:31-39 is one of my top favorites. God is a mighty fortress, the Lord of angel armies who fights for His people.  We may be accounted as sheep for the slaughter, nevertheless, in all these things, we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.

The circumstances of Joyful One's birth were far from ideal. A month ago, my heart was unsure of how things would turn out, yet trusting in no one else but my God who rejoices over His children with singing, and quiets their anxious hearts with His love.

Today, as dear Joyful One turns one month old, I offer this special prayer for him:

My Jehovah Sabaoth, my grandson Joyful One is safe in Your arms. The enemy did try to shake our faith, tried to make us doubt Your goodness, but once again You triumphed over his evil plans.

You are strong, and mighty. You are our strong deliverer! 

With You on our side, the victory is secure. 

I declare today that Joyful One will know You as His Jehovah Sabaoth, the Lord of Angel Armies.

You have shown me time and again that You are for me, and that You hold my life in Your hands.

What this world offers has little value and is temporary, but the eternal weight of Your glory is mine for all eternity!

My family is a precious part of my life, Lord. I offer my grandson to You, for Your continued protection. You surround Him with angelic escorts. You alone are God, majestic Creator and Ruler of the universe, You sit enthroned upon the heavens, sovereign over the affairs of our lives.

Be exalted in the life of Joyful One dear God, as he has reached one month of his young life, healthy, gaining strength, and receiving love and affirmation from all who love him.

You alone are worthy to be praised in the life of my grandson, heavenly Father!

 28 days old

 one month old

 with loving parents 

a mini cake to celebrate Joyful One's first month of life 

Three special songs for Joyful One:

The Season of Our Joy

Dance, Dance Under the Rain

photo credit

The LORD your God in your midst

The Mighty One, will save;

He will rejoice over you with gladness,

He will quiet you with His love;

He will rejoice over you with singing.

- Zephaniah 3:17

Today October bids us good-bye.

It has surely been an unexpected kind of month for me and our family. My daughter in law Chosen One was not due to give birth to her second baby until the second week of November.

October would then be a good time for me to visit my daughter in Manila again. I could be back in time for our family birthday celebrations, as well as to welcome my third grandson when he finally arrives. 

Early on October 5, a Sunday, I booked my flight. The plan was for me to leave on the 9th, the day after the first night of the Feast of Tabernacles, to enable me to celebrate this feast in a worship festival at the New Government Center together with my friends. My return date was early morning of the 20th, just in time for a lunch celebration of Forerunner's 6th birthday.

That planned trip never materialized. As I had written in a previous post, after lunch that same Sunday, I got a call from my son. Chosen One's bag of waters ruptured and they were on their way to the hospital.

Chosen One was admitted, and her doctor ordered complete bed rest for her, as the ultrasound results showed no traces of infection, low normal amniotic fluid in her womb, and the baby's heartbeat was strong and normal. She was given antibiotics, and steroids to protect the baby's still immature lungs.

What did I feel in all this?

I must admit, I was anxious. After all, anything could go wrong... Weighing only a little more than 4 pounds, the baby was tiny. And at 33 weeks, he still had fluid in his lungs. And since he was going to be born by Caesarian section, and being a preemie at that, the possibility of him being born with wet lungs syndrome was high. 

With money and power, we can put a mask over our fears. We can get things done our way... manipulate circumstances to make them work in our favor. But when things are beyond our control, we realize just how truly vulnerable and helpless we are.

In truth, we are always utterly dependent on God. He alone holds our lives in His hands. But how easy it is to lose sight of this, especially when things are going our way, or when we can make things work in our own strength and ability.

God "rocks the boat" of our comfortable lives by allowing circumstances that force us to run to Him, admitting our need for His intervention and help.

At a time like this, after the necessary "human" steps have been taken, all we have left is a heartfelt prayer.

One would be a fool not to take the path of prayer when the only way out is by looking up. At many seeming cul-de-sac and rock bottom situations of my life, prayer and worship have been my lifeline to Almighty God.

As an act of obedience and faith, I chose not to dwell on what could go wrong, Instead I thanked God in advance for His protection and victory. I surrounded my dear Chosen One and her baby with songs of praise.

I chose the path of joy.

As always, God had been preparing my heart. Just that Sunday afternoon, a few minutes before Worshiper called, I was reading Nehemiah, and the verse I was meditating on was Chapter 8:10 - 

...this day is holy to our LORD.

Do not sorrow for the joy of the LORD is your strength.

I brought my fears before God and laid them at His feet. I chose to believe that my Abba Father knew what He was doing.

As I prayed, my heart overflowed with love for my second son, and his wife, and their coming baby. They were a godly couple, hardworking, and God fearing. I admired them for their values and principles. My son was loving and caring, Chosen One was submissive and honoring toward her husband.

At a young age, they had already experienced a difficult childbirth nearly four years ago, when their first son Full of Hope was born as a distressed baby, with water in his lungs, neonatal pneumonia, and blood infection. He had to be in the neonatal ICU for 11 days before he was finally declared healthy and fit to be brought home.

Even then, Father God had been faithful. That baby is now a healthy, vibrant, joyful, smart 4 year old boy.

"I'm am now a kuya," he would tell everyone. Kuya means "big brother" in our dialect.

Early on October 8, I was down on my knees for my third grandson who was going to be born at around 8 oclock that morning.

What a meaningful day for him to be born! At sundown of that very day we were going to celebrate the Feast of Tabernacles, a seven-day feast commemorating the goodness and faithfulness of God toward His people. 

One of the seven feasts of the Lord, this was very important and meaningful not only for Jews, but also for all Christians who are getting reconnected to the Hebrew foundations of their faith. The Hebrew word hag means "to dance or to be joyous," or literally, "to be giddy with joy."

And indeed,  this feast celebrating the final harvest of fruit was a special time of joy; it was also called Z'man Simchateinu, or "the season of our joy."

Afred Edersheim writes in The Temple: Its Ministry and Services, that the Feast of Tabernacles was the joyous high point of the year in ancient Israel:

The most joyous of all festive seasons in Israel was that of the ‘Feast of Tabernacles.’ It fell on a time of year when the hearts of the people would naturally be full of thankfulness, gladness, and expectancy. All the crops had been long stored; and now all fruits were also gathered, the vintage past, and the land only awaited the softening and refreshment of the ‘latter rain,’ to prepare it for a new crop. It was appropriate that, when the commencement of the harvest had been consecrated by offering the first ripe sheaf of barley, and the full ingathering of the corn by the two wave-loaves, there should now be a harvest feast of thankfulness and of gladness unto the Lord. 

At this feast, the Jews rejoiced, and thanked God in advance for the rains that they are asking Him to give, in preparation for the new crop. 

It was at this feast that John writes these words:

In the last day, that great day of the feast, 
Jesus stood and cried, saying, 
If any man thirst, let him come unto Me, and drink.
- John 7:37

Down on my knees, I thanked God for the birth of this baby, and I gave him the name Joyful One... for his birth was indeed a harbinger of joy for our family.

That same morning, Abba Father spoke Zephaniah 3:17 clearly into my heart. He is singing His love song over all of us, especially over Joyful One.

He is in our midst, He is mighty to save, He quiets us with His love. He dances over us with joy!

Abba sings a love song... and He invites us to respond. 

If I receive His songs of joy, then fear has no room in my heart. Only rejoicing in His love.

Heaven must be bursting with songs of life, our sure protection from the lies the enemy would have us believe.

Father God says, "He who has ears to hear, let him hear what the Spirit is saying."

We need to activate our spiritual senses for spiritual things are spiritually discerned.

Joyful One, whom his parents have named Jeremiah David, was born weighing 4 pounds 12 ounces.

Together with friends, I celebrated the Feast of Tabernacles at the government center that evening. There was food overflowing in every tent, and an atmosphere of joy and excitement while the stage with the band and singers was being prepared. But before we could begin with the worship celebration, there was a deafening thunderstorm followed by a heavy downpour. We thought the skies would eventually clear up and we would be able to see the blood moon up in the sky as it rose, but the rains continued to pour without letup.

We remained in our tents, enjoying the food and the company of one another. Many of the young people danced in the rain.

In the midst of the pouring rain I was having a conversation with Abba Avinu. Rain down your favor upon our family, dear Father. Surround my grandson with your healing presence. Sing over him your songs of deliverance. 

Father God whispered gently, Trust Me in this, My dear daughter.

Within 36 hours, the baby's lungs had been completely drained of fluids, and he was breathing normally on his own. He also began breastfeeding 36 hours after birth, and there was no trace of infection in his body. He was discharged 8 days later.

Indeed, this is the season of our joy. And I name this month as such...

Thank You Abba Father. Again, words are not enough for the joy that I feel. You have done all things well. You are trustworthy. You alone deserve our praise and thanksgiving.

 Joyful One, a few minutes after birth

at five days old

at 11 days old

This beautiful song is my prayer for Joyful One:

Sing Over Me

I live in the wonder of Your love

You rise like the sun in my heart

Even when the night draws near to me

There You are

I will wade in the water of mercy

I will walk in the light of Your will

Whatever should come against me

Teach me to be still

As You sing over me

Draw me close to rest in Your peace

Sing over me

Oh, sing

Sing of Your unending faithfulness

That knows no doubt or fear

In the face of all that I don't know yet

Remind me of who You are

Sing over me

Draw me close to rest in Your peace

Sing over me, 

Oh, sing

You are mighty, You will save

Rejoice over me with singing

You will quiet by Your love

Glory over me with singing

You are mighty, You will save

Rejoice over me with singing

You will quiet by Your love

Glory over me with singing

Sing over me

Draw me close to rest in Your peace

Sing over me

Oh, sing

Related blog entry: A New Season, A New Name

My One Desire

image source

But now, thus says the LORD, who created you, O Jacob,

And He who formed you, O Israel:

"Fear not, for I have redeemed you;

I have called you by your name;

You are Mine..."

- Isaiah 43:1

Six years ago today, first grandson Forerunner was born.

My dear Forerunner, 

I have loved you even before I set eyes on you, 

and prayed for you while you were being formed 
and created in your mother's womb.

You were the new life that God brought into our family 

just one month before your Lolo (Grandpa) Ernie left this earth.

Somehow, in the Father's scheme of things, 
you were the little baby sent by God 
to fill our grieving hearts with joy. 
Your presence in my life was Abba's way of easing my pain 
during my season of loss.

But today, my dear Forerunner you have become to me, 

more than anything else, a reminder of God's faithfulness.

You are a product of much prayer... 

indeed as Francis Frangipane writes, 

the greatest good that having children (and grandchildren)
brings into a parent's life 

is that it makes passionate prayer warriors out of us!

I have been listening to Lenny LeBlanc's beautiful song, One Desire. 

Today, dear Forerunner as you celebrate your sixth birthday, 

my prayer is that this song will be your song as you grow up.

Love always,

Nana

Abba Avinu, I pray for my dear Forerunner today, 

May his heart be shaped and molded into a heart that seeks to honor You with his whole life, 

and to follow after You with his whole heart.

One Desire

Chorus:

If I could have one desire

Before my life is through

Even in my darkest night

My life would shine for You

If I could stop the hands of time

Or make a wish come true

I would tell my heart to burn with fire

For no one else but You

This is my one desire.

You are my Saving Grace

Anchor of my soul

In a world that's turned upside down

I want You to know (Chorus)

You are my Faithful Friend

The One that I lean on

You always understand

With all that I am

I'll give you the deepest devotion I know

With all of my strength

I won't let You go

As I look to You above

I will give You all my love (Chorus)