Windows: A Way of Seeing

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After these things I looked,

and behold, a door standing in heaven.

And the first voice which I heard was like a trumpet

speaking with me, saying,

"Come up here, and I will show you 
things which must take place after this."

- Revelation 4:1 "




In heaven's eyes, there are no losers.

February started off quite slowly... gradually picking up speed. Without my realizing it, the month will be over in just a few more hours. 

I have asked Abba Father what name to give it. And as I have pondered over the past weeks, one word kept coming up.

Windows.

Here are a few thoughts on my mind as I look back over the twenty-eight days that have graced this chapter of my life story. 

We can go through life with self sitting at the helm, so to speak.

My rules... my standards... my expectations... my agenda.

But life with self at the center neither satisfies nor fulfills. Rather, it hinders growth, blocks forward movement, puts blinders on our eyes, and boxes us in.

We don't really see very far when all we are focused on is self.

An unhealthy preoccupation with self stifles and stunts, very much like a garden that is overfertilized with chemicals and synthetic growth stimulants, resulting in slow death.

God desires to keep the ground of our hearts moist and soft with His life-giving presence.

The past years, God has brought me through a series of painful inner renovation, and gradual change has come, leading me to decide that self-focus is definitely not the road I want to walk on.

I want to live my life as a gift for others. This is one of my unspoken life metaphors.

From one obedient choice after another, the fallow ground of the heart can be cultivated, and trained to be as broken bread and poured out wine for others.

And God brings us out into a broad place, and enlarges the path under our feet. (Psalm 18:19, 36)

And opens before us windows - into His heart, our own heart, and the hearts of others.


Windows in our hearts allow God's revealing light and fresh wind to come in.


This jar is flawed and imperfect in many ways, but the Father lets His light shine through willing albeit broken vessels.

These are the key lessons in my journey: brokenness, humility, obedience, and trust.

I've personally understood how meaningful that is, to be a person in process.

Until we come face to face with our Eternal Creator, brokenness will be a normal part of our earthly sojourns.


And living my life as a gift for others means that my inner and outer lives are one and the same...

Where I allow others to see my weakness, instead of hiding it.

Yet humbly rejoicing in my victories, in my strengths and abilities... and faithfully carrying out the assignments I have been given.

And in all these, offering my heart as a channel of blessing through which God's mercy and compassion flow.


Yes, I love the person I have become and am becoming!  I embrace the process... and daily look forward to the goal.

I am a person in transition... being shaped, and molded, and conformed to Christ's image.

How I allow God to change me in the seasons of my life is the gift I offer.

Others may reject it, but that is not really my problem. There are many others who stand ready to receive.

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To keep the windows of my heart open, being authentic is absolutely necessary.

What I say to someone in his presence, is the same as what I will speak about him behind his back.

Because what I believe in deep inside will eventually show up in my words, actions, and decisions.

There really is no such thing as a double life. I cannot keep what is inside hidden for long. If not in my speech or behavior, it will show up in my face and body language and in the things that I invest my time and money in.

Henri Nouwen puts it so beautifully:

We like to make a distinction between our private and public lives and say, “Whatever I do in my private life is nobody else’s business.” But anyone trying to live a spiritual life will soon discover that the most personal is the most universal, the most hidden is the most public, and the most solitary is the most communal. What we live in the most intimate places of our beings is not just for us but for all people. That is why our inner lives are lives for others. That is why our solitude is a gift to our community, and that is why our most secret thoughts affect our common life. (source)

Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, 
but on a stand, 

and it gives light to all in the house.

In the same way, let your light shine before others,

so that they may see your good works 

and give glory to your Father who is in heaven. 
- Matthew 5:15

This month God is speaking to me about looking at other people's lives through the window of their own brokenness, imperfection, and pain.

With acceptance, with understanding.

Not with self-righteous judgment.


Windows.

It means letting God's redeeming love be the filter through which I see my world.

Thanks to the lessons from this month, I am reminded of the awesome privilege of seeing people through heaven's eyes...

to listen to people's hearts, more than their words...

to see the inner person beneath the actions...

to discern the gold, not the sand...

to appreciate the treasure beneath the clutter...

to separate identity from behavior...

to believe in the persons they are becoming...

and be amazed by the grace that I find (a line borrowed from Sandi Patty's song).

Then I can gladly accept what others give me of themselves.

How liberating it is to be able to look at life through the window of abundance, not of lack, or disappointment, or even a sickening sense of entitlement.

What a privilege indeed, to be the Father's redemptive agent in the life of anyone that God sends my way.

I arrived in Metro Manila this morning, to spend a few days with my only sister who is in the country for a couple of months.

Today February ends but not before leaving me this precious gift. The gift of perspective.

Therefore, behold, I will allure her,

Will bring her into the wilderness,

And speak comfort to her.

I will give her her vineyards from there,

And the Valley of Achor as a door of hope...

- Hosea 2:14-15

Two songs for this season of my life:

In Heaven's Eyes

In Christ Alone

The February 2017 chapter of my life... in pictures.

Sabbath Grace

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For You, O Lord, will bless the righteous;

With favor You will surround him as with a shield.

- Psalm 5:12

I am no longer as driven as I used to be about writing blog posts. When this blog was new, I could write as many as three or more entries per week.

This blog was born on February 7, 2008, in Chiang Mai, Thailand. That was nine years ago. (Click on link to read my maiden blog post: What's in a Name?)

That same year, my husband Ernie went home to heaven. And as I put my feelings into words, my blog became a trusted companion as together we walked down the road called Grief, a God-given provision to help me come to terms with the pain of that season. (Here's the link: My Journey Through Grief)

On my 60th year, this blog was a silent listener as I talked about some life lessons God taught me through the years. Again the electronic pen and paper became my partners who helped me put together those meaningful chapters of my life story. (Here's the link to the first life lesson in the series: Restoration-A Matter of Perspective)

These past years, I have endeavored to write at least one post a month, to sort of summarize what the past four weeks have been like, and also to give the month a name.

February is far from over, but tonight I am led to share how this one particular Sabbath went for me. It is much too special to just let it go by.

I know that God's mercy and compassion are new every morning.

Each morning, I make it a point to kneel at the foot of my bed as soon as I awake, I pledge my allegiance to Him as King who sits as sovereign ruler over my life, and to thank Him for the brand new mercies that He has placed at my disposal for the next 24 hours of the day.

Each evening, at sundown, whenever possible, I welcome the new day, because the 24-hour day actually begins at sundown. And I thank God for His provision of rest and renewal during the night that will give me the strength I need for the daylight hours the following morning.

Each night, before I close my eyes, I thank God for the more than enough store of grace and compassion that was available to me, and I realize that I have not even scratched the surface of what God had intended for me. Indeed His love knows no measure!

But today was just so special... it felt like God poured buckets of favor over my heart!

The past days, I have been savoring my time alone here at home. There's been time to visit my garden, to read, and to have chunks of time to myself listening to worship music.

I'm thankful for the time of unplanned prayer ministry with two dear friends of mine this week.

After the fast pace of the previous months, the slower days of February are so refreshing to my soul.

And this week I have been thinking about the words of Jesus in John 15:9 --

As the Father has loved Me, so have I loved you. Remain in My love.

That word "remain" means to continue, to abide, to stay in a close relationship of delight.

God invites us to reciprocate His love. The phrase has the connotation of giving, and receiving, joyful affection.

I have looked at the different passages in the Bible that speak of delight. The very first word in the Bible that speaks of God being "delighted" is mentioned in Genesis, where it says that He looked at all He had made, and it was very good.

God was delighted with what He had done.

I thought of the word delight in Psalm 37:4.

Delight yourself in the LORD, 
and he will give you the desires of your heart.

My own interpretation of this verse is that if I take delight in the Lord, He will also be delighted to give me what my heart desires! The passage speaks of a reciprocal relationship of delight!

Delight in this passage has the connotation of being pliable and soft.

Being gentle.... flexible... teachable.

It means easy to be entreated.

Or easy to please.

Compare that with hard-hearted... difficult to please... demanding and easily offended.

I'll take delight any day.

In the midst of the greed, unkindness, selfishness, and disappointments in the world, delight in the atmosphere will change the spiritual environment and landscape of our lives!

Today was such a day.

I was awakened at 3:45 a.m. As I awoke, there was a sense of overflowing joy in my heart.

Today is a Sabbath day, I thought to myself. I will prepare my heart and be ready in time for the 6 a.m. dawn watch at the House of Prayer.

First thing I did was to thank God for the new day.

Then I went to my prayer desk to listen to a few chapters from the gospel of John, and the first chapter of Revelation. 

Then to the kitchen for some fruit - starting with a small cup of freshly squeezed native lemon juice.

Prepared dog food for my pets.

Took a shower and got dressed.

Arrived at the Negros Island house of prayer a few minutes before the dawn watch prayer time began.

For the next two hours, we were in the awesome presence of God, praying for the nation, for Israel, and other things that were placed on our hearts. It didn't feel like two hours at all. The prayers just flowed... and blended in with the worship songs and the Bible verses...

What a delight it was!

We went to Tom N Toms Coffee Shop for breakfast. So grateful to a friend who offered to pay for my food. Again, what a delightful time we all had.

When I arrived home, my ever efficient helper had already finished watering the garden and doing the laundry and she was in the process of cleaning the house. Again... my heart was filled with so much appreciation for her... My heart was delighted!

Back at my prayer desk, I prayed for my sister-in-law Faith who was arriving from the US within the morning to spend a few days with her mom. In my heart, I wanted to see her today, but nothing was finalized. There were flight delays... her mom had already scheduled a family lunch... and there was still a two hour road trip for them after the lunch.

Okay, Lord... I leave everything in Your hands. 

I sent her a welcome message on Messenger.

It was 12 noon. By then, I was quite ready for a nap.

I woke up with a start and looked at the clock. It was 1:30 p.m. already!

I checked my messages on Messenger. My sister in law had sent a message at 1:10 p.m. saying they had just come in, and was inviting me to join them for lunch...

Got dressed in one minute and hopped on a cab the next. Got to the restaurant just as they were finishing their lunch.

In short... everything turned out beautifully.

We had a brief but sweet time together. And I went back home with a huge bag of goodies from the States, gifts of grace for me and my family.

Again, my heart felt so delighted. 

So thankful to Abba Father for the gentleness of this Sabbath day. A day of rest, renewal, and restoration.

A day overflowing with His favor, mercy, and grace.

I am so thankful to You, my dear Abba, for today.

For making me experience the delight of Your love in a tangible way!

The Message version puts it this way: "Make yourselves at home in my love." 

That is exactly how I feel, Lord! I feel very much at home in Your love!

Here's the Hebrew song of worship I listened to as this beautiful day was coming to an end.

A Divine Repositioning

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The hand of the Lord came upon me and brought me out in the Spirit of the Lord, and set me down in the midst of the valley; and it was full of bones. Then He caused me to pass by them all around, and behold, there were very many in the open valley; and indeed they were very dry. And He said to me, “Son of man, can these bones live?” So I answered, “O Lord God, You know.”
- Ezekiel 37:1-3

Therefore, behold, I will allure her,

and bring her into the wilderness,

and speak tenderly to her.

And there I will give her her vineyards

and make the Valley of Achor a door of hope.

And there she shall answer as in the days of her youth,

as at the time when she came out of the land of Egypt.

- Hosea 2:14-15

"... For the mountains may depart
and the hills be removed,
but My steadfast love shall not depart from you,
and My covenant of peace shall not be removed,”
says the Lord, who has compassion on you.
-Isaiah 54:10




Return to your stronghold, O prisoners of hope;
today I declare that I will restore to you double.
- Zechariah 9:12




You will also declare a thing,
And it will be established for you;
So light will shine on your ways.
- Job 22:28

The year 2016 was a landmark year for me. In many ways, it was also a defining year. The year began with me feeling so hopeful, so certain was I that it was going to be a beautiful year.

As 2016 began, this was the declaration I wrote in my journal:

This is the year of my redemption... my healing... my upgrade... my new sources of provision... a fresh awareness of God's glory in my life... cancellation of my debts... my restoration... my recompense.

Three weeks into the new year, something happened that just turned my world upside down.

The rest of the year is the story of how God grabbed a hold of me and changed my heart. From one of fear, and doubt... to one of trust and hope.

It did turn out to be a different kind of beautiful... not falling into the usual well-defined and picture-perfect categories.

But a rugged type of beauty.

It was God's living Word that helped me make the needed adjustment in my perspective.

Somewhere towards the last quarter of 2016, on the feast of Rosh Hashanah, the Hebrew year 5776 came to an end, and we welcomed the year 5777.

The year 5776 is called Ayin Vav. Ayin, the sixteenth letter in the Hebrew alphabet, has the numerical value of seventy. It stands for right seeing, right choices, right perspective.

Vav, the sixth letter, literally means tent peg, or hook. It stands for a connection between earthly and heavenly realities.

Looking back at the past year, I can clearly see how Ayin Vav did operate in the circumstances of my life. Father was changing my perspective, re-connecting and re-aligning my heart to His heart.

In 2016, the hand of the Lord took hold of me, brought me out of my comfort zone (again!), and set me down in the midst of a valley of dry bones.

And in that valley, that wilderness, God asked me, Can these bones live?

At that time, like Ezekiel, all I could answer was, O Lord God, You know.

The 2016 chapter of my life story is all about how God led me to the wilderness where He spoke tenderly of many specific promises.

My steadfast love shall not depart from you, and My covenant of peace shall not be removed.

Return to your stronghold, O prisoners of hope; today I declare that I will restore to you double.

What I thought was the Valley of Achor was actually a door of hope. What I thought was a hopeless valley of dry bones was an exceedingly great army of dead bodies raised back to life.

"Then you shall know that I am the Lord, when I have opened your graves, O My people, and brought you up from your graves. I will put My Spirit in you, and you shall live, and I will place you in your own land. Then you shall know that I, the Lord, have spoken it and performed it,” says the Lord. - Ezekiel 37:13, 14

The year 2017 corresponds to the Hebrew year 5777, or Ayin Zayin. Zayin, is a picture of a sword or scepter with a crown.

The crowned scepter, zayin speaks of power, authority, and kingly anointing.

The crowned sword is a weapon for warfare, and can also be seen as a scythe, a harvest implement.


The year 5777 promises to be a year of harvest and breakthrough. Prophets are saying that it is the beginning of a seven-year period of great favor, provision, and victory, very much like the conquest of Canaan during the days of Joshua and Caleb.


Seven is the number of God, it stands for perfection. Triple seven stands for triple perfection!

As the year 2016 ended and we have entered the new year 2017, God gave me a new perspective from which to view my life.

There is a sense of His healing work being accelerated. Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are working double time to bring restoration and transformation to the bride of Christ. In the numerous ministry opportunities I have been given the past months, as the year drew to a close I realized God was bringing me to a season of complete dependence on Him, not on my own efforts, skills, or abilities. Everything was about simply being willing and obedient.

Father was teaching me how to minister from a sense of inner rest. Of sitting at His feet, gazing at His face, listening to His voice, and waiting. Especially waiting. Though it linger, wait for it is the word of the Lord in Habakkuk 2:3.

God was also sifting my relationships. Close friends that I had looked up to and depended on in the past are somehow being removed from that position in my life. But Father assures me that it's part of His plan.

Peter Scazzero in his book Emotionally Healthy Spirituality speaks of enlarging our soul through grief and loss... and of gaining more spiritual freedom through a greater detachment from people and things and worldly acclaim.

He writes:

Detachment is the great secret of interior peace. Along the way, in this journey with Christ, we get attached to (literally "nailed to") behaviors, habits, things, and people in an unhealthy way.

Then God allows us to go through the dark night of the soul... that we are left with no choice but to cut off our attachments to who we think we ought to be, or who we falsely think we are.

Along those lines, Father is also teaching me to honor our earthly leaders mostly for the position of authority that they hold, because unity is important to Him, and humility is the only way by which this comes about. This principle is true in the home, in the church, in the workplace, in the nation.



Many beautiful lessons to be thankful for.

But I think 2016 said good-bye much too soon.

When my daughter Obedient One returned to Manila on January 8, I felt a sense of sadness.

We had so much fun as a family during the celebration of Hanukkah, Christmas, and the New Year, but time moves fast.

It's but natural to feel that way, of course, especially because as a mother, I want my children within reach, even if they are already adults. But change is inevitable. The only way to make good use of time is to redeem it, that is, to use it wisely.


I took one long look at the Christmas tree before taking it down. There's nothing magical or spiritual about the tree... but to me, as I had mentioned in my previous post, it has become a historical symbol of my beautiful family.

But yes, I have been thinking of how nothing on this earth really lasts long enough to give us lasting joy. God means it that way. 

I joyfully detach from certain behaviors, traditions, even relationships, for a more meaningful attachment to God. 

I agree with Peter Scazzero when he says that we are to appreciate nature, people, and all God's gifts... without being enamored by them.

And of course, ministry is one of them, no matter how successful, or rewarding, it may seem.

And now I am ready for 2017.

An excerpt from my January 1, 2017 journal entry:

I name this month A Divine Repositioning.

In 2016 fear and doubt took hold of my heart... but God met me at my point of need... let me go through a crisis of belief... and enabled me to re-align my perspective to that of His. 

In the valley of dry bones, I am seeing the dead come back to life, through the breath of Ruach HaKadosh.

Here's a beautiful song by Lauren Daigle, Come Alive, Dry Bones.

No More Night

Beautiful petals that have fallen, a seeming waste.

Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints.

- Psalm 116:15

While the rest of the world was bidding the old year good-bye, and preparing to welcome the New Year with feasting and fireworks, in a little corner of a hospital here in Bacolod City, a family was grieving the passing away of a beloved member of their family.

A few hours before dawn of December 30, 2016, Lucio Lofranco went home to heaven.

The turn of events was so unexpected, and the pain of loss is devastating.

For the next eight days, family and friends gathered to mourn the death of this dear man.

I spent several nights at the funeral parlor where his body lay in state.

Initially, I went to fulfill a social obligation. Some of the Lofranco sisters were friends of mine, and on two occasions, I had been part of a team that ministered to this family a few years ago. I wanted to offer comfort to them by being with them at this time of deep loss.

But as I sat there, listening to the songs of praise, original compositions, tributes and eulogies given by the family members, and words of hope and comfort given by pastors each night of the wake,  I realized something was happening inside my heart.

Abba Father was giving me a glimpse into the glorious work He had done in the life of a man and his family.

Was it possible that I would get to know a person through his death?

That is exactly what happened to me. Through the words spoken and pictures shown during the nights I spent with the family, God showed me the way He redeemed the life of Tito Lucio. Indeed, what the enemy had intended for evil, the Father was able to turn around for good.

Each night, lines and snippets from Tito Lucio's life story were re-told, from the different perspectives of the children, children-in-law, grandchildren, friends, and extended family.

What a legacy Tito Lucio has left behind! As I listened to the tributes given by his children and grandchildren... many times I was also moved to tears together with them.

Orphaned at only a few hours after he was born, this man reached the ripe old age of 92, finished law school against all odds, and together with his wife Tita Lilies (whom he fondly called Darl) fathered ten children all of whom are now accomplished and successful men and women in their respective fields of endeavor.

Death is really an enemy because it is something that was never planned for by God when He created the world. Because of disobedience, death entered the world, causing an eternal and spiritual separation between God and His creation.

Yet, in the Father's wisdom, a provision for redemption was made... through another act of obedience.

Through His own sacrificial death on the Cross Jesus triumphed over death, and death has lost its sting.

To the one who has trusted in God as his Lord and Savior, death is no longer an enemy but a friend, because death is the door by which we gain entrance into eternal life.

Tito Lucio's passing away may have been unexpected by his family and friends here on earth, but it certainly did not take God by surprise.

In this lies our hope. God holds the times and seasons of our lives in His hands.

God kept speaking this truth to my heart: When we have put our trust in Him, we grieve our loss, but we grieve in dignity and in hope.

What an awesome privilege it was for me to be given an understanding of how He walks with us in our journey through the shadow of death. He is with us in the dark nights of our soul, He partners with us in our deepest pain and sorrow.


Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, 
I will fear no evil, for you are with me; 
your rod and your staff, they comfort me. - Psalm 23:4

Yes, because of His presence, it is possible to rejoice in the midst of sorrow.

Tears flowed, questions were asked, heartfelt prayers were spoken out... and each night ended in songs of praise and worship.

What a beautiful way to grieve.

I am just so thankful for the privilege of knowing God more, and bowing before Him in awe.

And I could understand a bit of what the family was going through, for I, too, had gone through the pain of losing a loved one.

God is faithful to keep His promise. Blessed are they who mourn for they shall be comforted.

In the midst of my pain, God spoke to me that heaven is the place of full and complete restoration and redemption.

In my own season of grief, God had taught me the redemptive value of embracing my loss.

And just as He comforted me in His own time and fashion, I have no doubt that Father God will also give comfort and strength to every member of the Lofranco family.

Despite the doubts and the what ifs  and the what could have beens in our minds, God is Jehovah Shalom, the God of Peace in whose heart rests all the answers to our questions.

Even when we can't understand His plans, He is still the Sovereign God, and we can always trust His heart.


The name Lucio means "light."

The name he was given is not accidental at all. It is God's job description for him.

He lived his life on earth as a carrier of light. He was a fighter.  The word defeat was not in his vocabulary.

That His Maker should call him home on the seventh night of Hanukkah, the Festival of Lights speaks a powerful message to us!

Now, Tito Lucio is in the land where the light of a million mornings shines forever, and where it is eternally spring.

Where he is, there is no more night.

And God's promise to any family that has lost a father, an earthly pillar of strength, can never be proven false:

Father of the fatherless and protector of widows 
is God in his holy habitation.

- Psalm 68:5

A favorite quote of mine:

Sharing songs of comfort and worship:

Sharing blog posts I have written about my own journey through grief:

The Broken Places
The Unveiling of the Tombstone