God of My Surrender

The LORD is my Banner

by Gustave Dore

photo source

Do not harden your hearts as you did at Meribah,

as you did that day at Massah in the wilderness...
- Psalm 95:8

You have given a banner to those who fear You,
that it may be displayed because of the truth.

- Psalm 60:4




And in that day there shall be a Root of Jesse,
Who shall stand as a banner to the people;
for the Gentiles shall seek Him,
and His resting place shall be glorious.

- Isaiah 11:10

Exodus 17: 10-17

So Joshua fought the Amalekites as Moses had ordered, and Moses, Aaron and Hur went to the top of the hill. As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. When Moses’ hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up—one on one side, one on the other—so that his hands remained steady till sunset. So Joshua overcame the Amalekite army with the sword.

Then the LORD said to Moses, “Write this on a scroll as something to be remembered and make sure that Joshua hears it, because I will completely blot out the name of Amalek from under heaven.”

Moses built an altar and called it The LORD is my Banner. He said, “Because hands were lifted up against the throne of the LORD, the LORD will be at war against the Amalekites from generation to generation.”

I arrived in Manila five days ago.

It always feels good to be back. Although I have lived in Bacolod for the past thirty-two years, Manila, the city where I was born and raised, will always be home to me. The last time I was here was two and half months ago, and as I waited outside baggage claim for an empty cab, there was a sense of child-like excitement in my heart.

Traffic was unusually light the afternoon I flew in. From the airport, it only took me less than an hour to reach our home in Quezon City.

I was greeted by my father's Melendrez tree in full bloom!

Whenever I enter our front door after having been away for a time, the first thing I do is to praise God and lift my heart in thanksgiving.

Praise the LORD, my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
Praise the LORD, my soul, and forget not all his benefits...
- Psalm 103:1,2

Indeed, there are so many things to be thankful for... I never ever want to forget God's benefits. And there is something about being thankful that imparts life to any environment that we enter.

This is the home where my sister and I were brought up by loving and kind parents. The place still holds many beautiful memories for me even though my parents have long passed away, and my only sister resides abroad with her family.

Many changes have taken place in the immediate neighborhood. But the sense of peace and serenity is still unmistakable in this place.

Now this too is home to my youngest child, Obedient One, who started living here five years ago.

Change.

It is an inevitable fact of life.

As often mentioned in my previous posts, we are always in a state of flux.

In transit.

Much as I want to hold on to the beauty, comfort and security of my past, all I have left are the memories. And even those will soon fade with time.

Nothing is ever permanent. The only certainty... the only constant in a world of change, is God Himself.


Gracious uncertainty. That's how Oswald Chambers refers to it.

He writes,

Certainty is the mark of the commonsense life—gracious uncertainty is the mark of the spiritual life. To be certain of God means that we are uncertain in all our ways, not knowing what tomorrow may bring. This is generally expressed with a sigh of sadness, but it should be an expression of breathless expectation. We are uncertain of the next step, but we are certain of God. As soon as we abandon ourselves to God and do the task He has placed closest to us, He begins to fill our lives with surprises.

Change confronts us as seasons come and go -- expected or unexpected.... welcome or not... change often enters our lives without asking permission.

And while it is true that we have little or no control over some of these changes, one thing is clear: we are free to choose our response in the midst of a difficult season.

I just love what Oswald Chambers says: As soon as we abandon ourselves to God and do the task He has placed closest to us, He begins to fill our lives with surprises.

Yes, indeed. We can position our hearts for the surprises of God.

The choice is up to us.



The Israelites went through a season of major change, and with it many opportunities to grow up, to be more appreciative, to mature... to look at life from a new perspective. The Almighty God was in their midst, and they saw with their own eyes the awesome display of His power.

How did they respond to change?

Stiff-necked and rebellious, that's what they were... choosing to complain at the slightest inconvenience.

The Israelites had just set up camp at Rephidim where they became thirsty and realized there was no water to drink. They grumbled ... complained... and grumbled some more. I cannot imagine what it must have been like for Moses to constantly listen to the whine and the clamor of two million newly freed slaves.

God shows Moses how to get water. "I will stand there before you by the rock at Horeb. Strike the rock, and water will come out of it for the people to drink." - Exodus 17:6

Water gushed forth... and there was more than enough for every person's thirst to be satisfied. Yet Moses named the place Massah and Meribah, Hebrew words that mean "Testing" and "Contention." Named as such because by their constant complaining and murmuring, the Israelites did put God to the test.

The truth is that you and I are made of very much the same stuff as they.


During the early years of my married life, I complained a lot.

In some of my earlier posts I write of my struggles with perfectionism. Everything had to be just right; it was hard to measure up to my standards. They were quite high.

But somewhere along my journey toward soul transformation, God looked at me with compassion, reached down, and rescued me from this terrible disposition.

Much work remains, but this I know for sure: setting me free from a complaining spirit is one of the best things that God has ever done for me.



C.S. Lewis wrote a little book entitled The Great Divorce, one of the greatest books he has ever written, in my humble opinion. An allegorical tale, the book is written in the same literary genre as Dante's Divine Comedy, and Bunyan's Pilgrim's Progress.

In a few paragraphs Lewis describes how a person may degenerate from grumbler to grumble.

"'... The question is whether she is a grumbler or only a grumble. If there is a real woman -- even the least trace of one-- still there inside the grumbling it can be brought to life again. If there is one wee spark under all those ashes, we'll blow it till the whole pile is red and clear. But if there's nothing but ashes we'll not go on blowing them in our own eyes forever... They must be swept up.'

'But how can there be a grumble without a grumbler?'

'The whole difficulty of understanding Hell is that the thing to be understood is so nearly Nothing. But ye'll have had experiences... it begins with a grumbling mood, and yourself still distinct from it: perhaps criticizing it. And yourself, in a dark hour, may will that mood, embrace it. Ye can repent and come out of it again. But there may come a day when you can do that no longer. Then there will be no you left to criticize the mood, nor even to enjoy it, but just the grumble itself going on forever like a machine...'"

C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce, pp. 75-78

I remember reading this book many years ago and running to God, pleading with Him to deliver me from a grumbling spirit. The process of change in my heart had started even before that night, but praise be to God, He knew how much I needed to read that book at that particular time.

I have since realized that a complaining spirit puts God to the test because each time I murmur against any change, any difficulty, or any unforeseen event in my life, I am actually murmuring against God, making me guilty of the sin of unbelief.

Indeed, a grumbling, fault-finding spirit is rooted in unbelief. A complaint is a message that God is not good enough, or that He is not big... or wise... or strong enough.

God is not enough. Period.

In naming the place Massah and Meribah, Moses was describing the character of that territory.

Lyndon, a dear friend, mentioned this during our Exodus 17 study a few weeks ago: From a mere entry point, a complaining attitude gains a foothold, and eventually becomes a stronghold.

If we are in the habit of complaining about anything we are not in favor of, eventually a spirit of murmuring takes over, and claims ownership of that place.

Finding fault with just about everything becomes a natural response.

Where the enemy has been given a legal ground to stay, he willingly takes up residence.

The kind of acts and attitudes frequently exhibited in a place will eventually define the atmosphere or climate over that place.

A complaining spirit attracts other spirits to come as well - arguing, disputing, discontented, hard to please, demanding, bitter. These kinds of spirit shrivel up and dry up the heart. The environment becomes barren and lifeless.




But there is hope.

If we cry out to God, He comes to our rescue. He will not leave us defenseless.

While still at Rephidim (named Massah and Meribah by Moses), the Israelites are attacked by Amalekites. The two stories connect, and I believe there is a spiritual significance.

We will not go far in our journey if we are carrying a heavy baggage of arguing, disputing and finger-pointing.

We will have to unload... allow God to prove that He is God who redeems and restores.

With hearts weighed down by contention and quarrelling, the Israelites face a dead end.

A battle against Amalek ensues. In the natural, victory is impossible.

The enemy fought dirty, hitting them from behind; the hearts of the Israelites were not right. They had no spiritual energy with which to fight.

Moses knew the problem... and the solution.

He exercises his authority, lifting up his hands to intercede.... until the breakthrough comes.

Interceding... that the deeply entrenched spirit of unbelief, as manifested by a habitual grumbling attitude, may be broken.

Joshua wins the battle against Amalek, but it takes the intercession of Moses, aided by Aaron and Hur, to provide the spiritual atmosphere. With the help of these two men, Moses interceded until the yoke of unbelief was broken. In both the physical and the spiritual realm, it required hard work.

And because of his obedient intercession, Israel was spared.

In this case, intercession was a matter of life and death for the Israelites. Their victory depended on what Moses did.

After the battle was won, Moses did not plant a flag. To commemorate the event, Moses chose to worship God.

He built an altar and called it Jehovah Nissi, "The Lord is my Banner."

A powerful example of what obedient intercession can achieve in the battles that we face.

That place of unbelief was transformed into a place of victory.



This is the cry of my heart today:

My Jehovah Nissi...
shine
your healing light
in the dark crevices of my heart

where hide fear, anxiety, unbelief...
reluctant to accept change...
I cling, hold fast
to old places of comfort and security...

Wash
every stain of fault-finding,
complaining...
and finger-pointing;

Guide...
lead me up the hill
of obedient intercession...


Amalek
the spirit of cowardice,
must gain
no foothold in my life.

Help me build today,
in my heart
that altar of victory...

for You are my Banner,
"God of my surrender"--
my Jehovah Nissi!

Just sharing a few things to be thankful for...

Some parts of the garden have suffered from the severe hot and dry spell we've had in the recent weeks. But despite the erratic weather, the bromeliads are blooming all over the place!

A graphic reminder that life triumphs over death!










One of the joys that deeply touches my heart is our maid Irene who serves us faithfully, keeping our Manila home clean, our garden well - watered... doing the other daily chores with such a joyful and uncomplaining spirit.






It's amazing how much joy a little dog can bring to our hearts!




My daughter Obedient One came back recently from a trip to Hong Kong and Macau. She knows I love to write, and my heart was overjoyed at this gift that she bought for me:

Do everything without grumbling or arguing,
so that you may become blameless and pure,
“children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.”
Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky
as you hold firmly to the word of life.

- Philippians 2:14-16