The Point of Grace

Rainstorm in the Desert

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There is the sound of abundance of rain.
- 1 Kings 18:41

On Tuesday morning last week, I meditated upon this devotional portion from Watchman Nee's A Table in the Wilderness:

How utterly Elijah ventured everything on his God! For three and a half years, there had been a nationwide drought, and water was very scarce indeed. Yet he insisted it be poured lavishly on the sacrifice that was to vindicate Jehovah. 

"What! Squander our precious reserves of water, with no rain in sight?" 

"Pour it on," said Elijah. "Do it a second time; do it a third!" And not content with that, he himself took a hand in filling the surrounding trench with water.

If we too are to see God vindicated, we must bring what we have and let it go to Him.

"But what will happen if rain doesn't come?" you protest. "I must hold on to the water I have."

God forbid! That way lies drought and barrenness. Let it go to Him! What you lose will be nothing when compared to His abundance of rain.

During the weekly Family Foundations International team building lunch and meeting that same day, I shared it with my friends. It was a message of encouragement that many of us needed to hear. 

Especially me.

I am at a point in my life where I feel very much alone. Questioning if the path I am on is the road of God's choosing for me.  Wondering if the faith I am holding on to is the kind of faith that pleases God, or if it is just pure and simple presumption on my part.

So many questions. But honestly, I am not sure if the answers I think I am receiving are God's answers, or plain wishful thinking.

When you are in the middle of a dark tunnel, it's hard to tell.

Suddenly I see all of my life's work before me, and it seems like they are all going down the drain.

Is God requiring of me another experience of free fall... where I let go of my hold on life, and just allow myself to fall to rock bottom?

Before our meeting ended, we prayed for one another. A dear friend prayed for God to give me the answers that I needed, "unexpected answers from secret, hidden places known to Him alone."

Amazing prayer... and in a way, an answer to that prayer came that very afternoon. I can't go into specifics, but within that same hour, my heart was deeply touched by a gesture of faith and love from a couple who has become so dear to my heart these days.

Our region has been experiencing a severe dry spell the past six months or so. The land has been crying out for rain.

When I meditated on that passage I quoted above, and shared the devotional with the FFI ministry team, I had no idea about how the weather was going to be that particular day. It was the usual hot and dry and humid that we have somehow gotten used to over the past several months.

At sundown, as I was having an early dinner at a restaurant with a friend, the rains began to fall. Not a slight drizzle, but a heavy downpour. The rains fell for over three hours, pouring abundant waters over the thirsty ground.

It was indeed an abundance of rain.

And it did something to my heart. I realized that God sent the rains that evening just for me.

The rice farmers and the sugar plantation owners in our province may think it was God's answer to their prayers.

But I honestly believe God sent that heavy downpour just for me.

You see, on top of the plethora of emotions that have been going on in my soul, there was a strong thread of fear holding these emotions together.

Bill Johnson's teaching on love and fear opened up a clear perspective from which to view what I was going through.

He says that everything we hear or receive into our lives, our reaction or response to the many issues around us, gets filtered by love or fear.

Love or fear.

These are the two defining elements of a person’s life.

Our natural response to any negative thing is to be afraid. Fear is the enemy's number one tactic to disengage us from our Life Source.

Fear is where we agree with the enemy. And anytime you believe the lie, you empower the liar. (Johnson)

So God speaks these reassuring words to us over and over again, Do not fear. It's His way of showing us a path that leads in the opposite direction, offering us a way out, and telling us that within reach is the grace to be victorious over fear.

What that heavy downpour did to my heart was to speak a message of love and grace from the very heart of God.

In the emptiness and brokenness of my own heart, God brought me once more to the point of grace.

And as an added confirmation, this morning Watchman Nee's devotional portion for January 22 was what I meditated on:

Great difficulties are meant only to force us out of ourselves into reliance on Him. When there is no way forward or back, then God is able. He has a plan. So do not fear impossibilities. They are of no account to Him. Fall at His feet, and wait for Him to act. A miracle is ahead.


Two powerful songs have ministered to me these past days, The Point of Grace by Dennis Jernigan, and No Longer Slaves by Jonathan and Melissa Helser.

When Jonathan sings these words, You split the sea so I could walk right through it; my fears were drowned in perfect love... I'm no longer a slave to fear, I am a child of God... I feel my spirit soaring!

How we need these dark tunnel experiences to bring us running toward the Father and holding on to Him and His promises. Truth be said, nobody can afford to live a life without being connected to God as his Life Source. 

Sooner or later the storms come, and everything we thought was important falls apart. We need to reset our priorities, and pay close attention to our spiritual navigational beacons and warning lights.

I have reached the point of grace. And once more, I am truly grateful for another layer of truth uncovered.

You are my hiding place;

You shall preserve me from trouble;

You shall surround me with songs of deliverance.

- Psalm 32:7