Grace Walk
Walk with Me and work with Me--watch how I do it.
Learn the unforced rhythms of grace.
I won't try to lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you.
Keep company with Me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly.

-Matthew 11:29-30 The Message


Hidden Treasures
One of the most satisfying aspects of writing
is that it can open in us deep wells of hidden treasures
that are beautiful for us as well as for others to see.

-Henri Nouwen in Bread for the Journey

A Modern Day Psaltery
David wrote psalms to express
what was in his heart.
Seeing no need to hide what he felt,
he wrote with sincerity, and with no hidden agenda.
What he felt was never taken against him.
Pray, dear reader, discern my heart between the lines.
Dinah Maria Craik couldn't have said it better:
"Oh the comfort -- the inexpressible comfort
of feeling safe with a person --
having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words,
but pouring them all right out, just as they are,
chaff and grain together;
certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them,
keep what is worth keeping,
and then, with the breath of kindness
blow the rest away."

Friday, September 30, 2011

A Shield of Honor

Sowing Seeds

photo source






Outdo one another in showing honor.
-Romans 12:10




For You, O Lord, will bless the righteous;
With favor You will surround him as with a shield.
-Psalm 5:12




For the LORD God is a sun and shield;
the LORD bestows favor and honor...
-Psalm 84:11




As long as the earth endures,
seedtime and harvest,
cold and heat,
summer and winter,
day and night
will never cease.
- Genesis 8:22




Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked.
A man reaps what he sows.
Whoever sows to please their flesh,
from the flesh will reap destruction;
whoever sows to please the Spirit,
from the Spirit will reap eternal life.
-Galatians 6:7, 8




“I will betroth you to Me forever;
Yes, I will betroth you to Me
In righteousness and justice,
In lovingkindness and mercy;
I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness,
And you shall know the LORD.
It shall come to pass in that day
That I will answer,” says the LORD;
“ I will answer the heavens,
And they shall answer the earth.
The earth shall answer
With grain,
With new wine,
And with oil;
They shall answer Jezreel.
Then I will sow her for Myself in the earth....”
-Hosea 2:19-23








In just a few hours September will say good-bye, and once again, I choose a name for this month.

The word Jezreel readily comes up.

How I love this word! It literally means, "God will sow."

What an appropriate name indeed!

While meditating on the word Jezreel, many thoughts come rushing to the surface of my mind. I share them here with my dear blog readers, my way of paying tribute to this month, in gratitude for the handcrafted lessons that September leaves behind.

It is also my way of doing a spiritual inventory even as I share my thoughts candidly, just as they come... unedited and unadulterated. An honest sharing from the heart, together with the raw emotions I feel in response to how God worked in my life this month.

As the year 2010 was ending, my Father gave me a word about the coming new year. He said that 2011 was going to be my Year of Promotion.

When God speaks a word to me, I usually tuck it away in a little corner of my mind... until something happens that prompts me to pull this word out from its hiding place, and receive fresh encouragement from it.

So the word "promotion" has been hidden in that corner all these months, until this evening.

When I heard the word Jezreel as my name for this month, the word "promotion" also came up.

"Hmmm... a rather strange combination," I thought at first. But the more I thought about the connection between these two words, the more I realized that what has been happening this past month is definitely more than just mere coincidence.

These past four weeks there were many opportunities for me to sow new seeds in the seedbed of my heart and in those of people around me.

There were opportune re-connections that happened as well, where friends I had not seen for a long time suddenly came into the picture again, and God used them to sow seeds of hope into my life!

In Genesis 8:22, God institutes the Law of Seedtime and Harvest. Everything on this earth operates on that law - what we sow is what we reap.

However, there is another law that God also instituted even from the time of creation, and that is the Law of Multiplication. That law states that whatever we sow is not harvested in the same quantity... we reap much, much more than what we sow.

This is surely an encouragement.

However, it can work disastrously as well! If we truly understood this law, we would be more watchful over the kind of things we sow.

People with business acumen know how this principle works. They invest their money in good business ventures expecting to receive a profit from it.

But money is not the only seed there is. Heaven's economy uses other kinds of currencies.

Obviously, actions are seeds. When we sow an act of kindness, kindness comes back to us in many ways.

Thoughts are seeds, so are attitudes. When we sow anger, we do not only reap anger... we reap bitterness... we reap rage. As Hosea 8:7 says:

They sow the wind and reap the whirlwind...


When we sow acceptance and unconditional love, we also reap so much more -- we reap honor, respect, harmony, unity. We can never demand love and gratitude from another person, but love freely given, without strings attached, will always come back to us when we least expect it!

Words are seeds, too.

Proverbs 18:21 clearly follows this law of seedtime and harvest:

Death and life are in the power of the tongue,
And those who love it will eat its fruit.

The words I speak have power to bear the fruit of death... or of life. The choice is mine: the fruit I eat, be it the fruit of death or the fruit of life, depends on the kind of seed words I have sown.

I can speak life and health to my body by the words I declare over it from day to day. My body hears, and my body responds accordingly.

Following the same principle, I can speak life and health to my relationships by the words I speak. Our words do not fall on deaf ears. Even words that are spoken beyond the hearing of another person can reach the spirit and soul of that person.

How this happens can be explained by using a simple analogy, that of sound waves. When we speak, the words are released into the atmosphere and are received as sound vibrations. The vibrations continue, very much like the ripples on the water created by a stone thrown into it.

The fact of the matter is this: the words we speak about another are like arrows. Sooner or later they hit the target, whether we intend for this to happen or not!

I believe that our words do not return to us empty. They come back with the fruit of death, or the fruit of life! They are seeds that have been sown, and it is only a matter of time before the fruits of our words manifest.

It was many years ago when I first understood that the principle of sowing and reaping applies to anything I do, think or say. It is a natural law, but it is also a spiritual law, and I have taken this principle to heart.

Of course I must admit that I have failed many times, but my earnest desire is to keep growing in this very important area. Jesus Himself says in Matthew 12:33-37 --


“Either make the tree good and its fruit good,
or else make the tree bad and its fruit bad;
for a tree is known by its fruit.
Brood of vipers! How can you, being evil, speak good things?
For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.
A good man out of the good treasure of his heart
brings forth good things,
and an evil man out of the evil treasure
brings forth evil things.
But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak,
they will give account of it in the day of judgment.
For by your words you will be justified,
and by your words you will be condemned.”


These are strong words! Thus, I consider the words that come out of my mouth as sacred matter with eternal consequences. I ask God to help me be willing and quick to admit where I have done wrong, rather than make excuses ... to repent before God, confess my sin, and renounce the power of careless words I may have knowingly or unknowingly released.

And, it always helps to know that God is able to redeem our mistakes, and forgive us our iniquities. All He is looking for is a humble, contrite heart.



In light of what I have just written, this has been an extraordinary month for me and my whole family.

We are facing new lessons, new challenges.

In the natural, it may look like the enemy has gained the upper hand.

But indeed, looks can be deceiving. God has an entirely different perspective from which He views our lives!

I am waiting to see how the events of my life will unfold before my eyes.

As always, my desire is to be a channel of blessing, a speaker of truth, a life-giver to anyone God sends my way.

I am once again being led of God to move out of my cherished positions of comfort and convenience... and to be honest, if I wanted to, I could allow myself to feel weighed down, or disheartened.

If I wanted to.

But I don't want to...

I consider it an honor and a privilege to be taught from first hand experience... to look at the recent events, not with doubt and confusion, but with renewed faith and hope.

In everything I do, the choice remains with me. Am I sowing seeds of trust... seeds of hope, seeds of obedience... seeds of compassion and understanding... seeds of forgiveness?

The kind of words I sow into the life of another person will determine how that person relates to me... the fruit of my relationship with another person is determined by the kind of seed I sow into that life!

The words of Gerry Osbron, the American pastor who has deeply impacted my life during the early years of my life as a married woman, will never be erased from my heart. He said, "When we refuse to forgive a person for a perceived wrong deed, or a perceived act of injustice, we burn the very bridge over which we ourselves will someday pass."

I choose to sow seeds of forgiveness today.



I also choose to sow seeds of honor.

A few days ago, two friends of mine and I got together for an important reason: We wanted to impart words of honor to one another, to build around one another a shield of honor that will protect us from the fiery darts of the demonic spirit of jealousy that the enemy seeks to throw at us more often than we are aware of it.

The spirit of jealousy kills, steals, and destroys.

But imparting honor, speaking life to others builds up our spiritual immune systems. It builds up a strong armor of protection shielding us from enemy attack in this area.


The Dancing Ducks: "Make a joyful noise unto the Lord!"


When we speak words of honor to another person, acknowledging that person's Godly character, affirming him or her in terms of the call of God on their life, proclaiming the good things that you know about that one, it is like a shield, and the enemy cannot wreak havoc or bring destruction into that person's life.


Rosemarie, Tina and me: sowing seed words of honor.
These dear friends of mine have given me unconditional love.


Speaking words of honor to another dismantles the lies of the enemy. It is walking in the opposite direction of the enemy. It is walking in the direction of heaven, and propels that person towards His God given calling and eternal destiny.

Arthur Burk writes:
As a basic protection in a ministry, giving honor to each other needs to be a core value.

We have learned to weed out of our language a thousand little things that are dishonoring comments. We don't mean them to be dishonoring since those comments are a part of our culture. [Ours] is a culture rife with dishonor. We make it an art form. Our talk shows are very degrading and dishonoring most of the time. Our public media celebrates dishonor and dishonorable things. Consequently, we have had to come in the opposite spirit in the extreme to learn how to weed those words out of our vocabulary.

Even further than that, we have learned how to express honor. We have learned how to recognize the hand of God in other individuals. In what used to be routine conversations we now recognize the presence of God, His purposes, His hand in circumstances, and His blessings on an individuals life.

An excerpt from Spirit of Jealousy, by Arthur Burk



Truly, it has been an amazing month for me. I have never walked this way before. It amazes me as I realize that just a month ago, I wrote these words on a blog entry (see Re-creating Your Environment):

Honor is the language and conduct of royalty!

Showing honor is the mark of nobility and kingly status! With my words I want to weave a tapestry of beautiful memories to warm the hearts of those I will someday leave behind.

A legacy of honor. That is what I want to leave behind.


Through the recent circumstances of this month God was showing me the value of sowing seeds of honor in the life of others!

And to make everything even more meaningful, God spoke these beautiful words to me tonight:

This, My child, is the way of promotion. The way up is the way down. The land of your wounding is the land of your anointing. I am the God who doesn't sleep. I see what you are going through. No weapon forged against you will prosper, but you will rise up, you will be promoted, to refute every lie that the enemy speaks against you. In this season, call on My powerful name, Father of the fatherless... Defender of widows. I will surely answer. "


My Father reminds me that when I sow in hope, in the midst of my difficult hour, there is a harvest of joy that awaits me. My life story may have several chapters of pain coming from unexpected places... but then deep joy... new growth... and a bountiful harvest come from those unexpected places as well!

Those who sow with tears
will reap with songs of joy.
Those who go out weeping,
carrying seed to sow,
will return with songs of joy,
carrying sheaves with them.
- Psalm 126:5, 6


What a beautiful ending to an unusual month. It fills my cup to overflowing... and with my cup brimming over with these words of honor, words of promise and hope, as September comes to an end, I am ready to face another month.

And by God's enabling grace, I am ready to sow seeds of honor in the lives of those around me knowing that the day will come when God will spread the sheaves from my plentiful harvest before my very eyes!




Sow a thought, reap an act;
Sow an act, reap a habit;
Sow a habit, reap a character;
Sow a character, reap a destiny.

- Charles Reade

Elijah, A Prince of Valor


Elijah: Full of Hope, Mighty Warrior





Do you see a man skilled in his work?
He will stand before kings;
He will not stand before obscure men.
- Proverbs 22:29





My grandson Elijah turned ten months old this September. It is another milestone we celebrated as a family.

Below is the special grandmother's blessing I pray over this little boy:



Dear grandson, Elijah...

As you turn ten months old, this is my blessing for you.

Honor.

Valor.

Courage.

These three words stand out in my heart for you today.

You will grow up to be no ordinary man... you will be a prince of valor, schooled in the ways of honor... trained to perform royal duties.

Yes, my dear grandson, you will not serve before obscure men, you will stand before kings.

What will set you apart from common men?

Your heart, dear little one, is what will spell all the difference. You will not be a man with a small heart. You will have a big heart that will be ready to look at another with compassion, and understanding, and selflessness.

You will not be afraid to walk the unbeaten path, rather you will go where the Spirit of the Lord tells you to go.

You will speak words of honor to others, yes, always kind words.

May God give you a depth of vision to see beyond the physical.

Your character will be one of valor... unflinching in the midst of corruption and darkness. You will represent God's kingdom well, dear Elijah.

Your mouth will be a mouthpiece that brings good news, therefore I pray that God will teach you early in life refined speech... the language of kings... the language of royalty.

May you grow up knowing that you are no ordinary child. You are set apart for great things. May you be as a knight on a white stallion... riding into the battle, unafraid... undaunted... strong... confident of your convictions... knowing what you believe in... armed with throne room secrets...
sure of victory... determined to win the fight.

This is my prayer for you today, dear grandson, Full of Hope, and Mighty Warrior.

Love always,
Nana

Pictures taken during our family lunch at Balaring, a seaside restaurant located two cities away from Bacolod, to celebrate Elijah's tenth month.

Worshiper, Full of Hope, and Chosen One


This is a picture of our family
(my daughter Obedient One is not in the picture).


My daughters in love, Chosen One and God-given, and their sons, Full of Hope and Forerunner.


Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Blow the Trumpet in Zion

Blowing the Shofar

photo source




Blow the trumpet in Zion,
Consecrate a fast,
Call a sacred assembly...

- Joel 2:15




I would have despaired unless I had believed
that I would see the goodness of the Lord
In the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord;
Be strong and let your heart take courage;
Yes, wait for the Lord.

- Psalm 27:13, 14





Commit your way to the LORD;
trust in him and he will do this:
He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn,
your vindication like the noonday sun.

- Psalm 37:5, 6 (TNIV)







Today I take time to write a special post about a significant Jewish feast. This is to acknowledge that my faith has a spiritual connection to its Jewish roots, and that the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob is the same God I worship and obey today.

Beginning at sundown today, September 28, to nightfall of September 30, Jews around the world will hold their yearly celebration of Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year.

It is also known as the Feast of Trumpets.

Rosh Hashanah literally means "head of the year" but the holiday actually takes place on the first two days of the Hebrew month of Tishrei, which is the seventh month on the Hebrew calendar. This is because Rosh Hashanah, one of four new years in the Jewish year, is considered the new year of people, animals and legal contracts.

Rosh Hashanah heralds the newness of the year with special traditions such as the blowing of the Shofar, or ram's horn, which symbolizes a trumpet fanfare at the coronation of a king.

A common greeting on Rosh Hashanah is shana tovah u'metukah, Hebrew for "a good and sweet new year."

Mostly sweet foods are eaten in celebration of Rosh Hashanah, such as challah bread dipped in honey or apple slices dipped in honey, to symbolize the desire for a sweet year.

In the Jewish oral tradition, Rosh Hashanah marks the completion of the creation of the world and highlights the special relationship between God and mankind.

The Talmud describes this day as one of malchuyot, zichronot, shofrot -- sovereignty, remembrance and shofar, a reminder of the goodness of God to His people and the importance of righteous living.

Rosh Hashanah is the beginning of the Jewish High Holy Days, or Yamim Noraim (the "Days of Awe"), and is followed ten days later by Yom Kippur, the "day of atonement."

The Mishnah refers to Rosh Hashanah as the "day of judgment." It is believed that on this day God opens the Book of Life, reviews the deeds of His people, and begins to decide who shall live and who shall die. Those found righteous are sealed to life on Yom Kippur.

The days between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur are therefore viewed as an opportunity for Jews to repent and ensure a good fate.

The Jews believe that the High Holy Days offer a month-long opportunity for self-evaluation, praying in community and ritual which allows them to create a spiritual journey, corporately and individually.

The Days of Awe, or ten days of repentance, are meant to be spent in "serious reflection, repentance and making amends." (Lauren Bottner in From Selichot to Simchat Torah)

"This is a time of year when we seek reconciliation with people we may have wronged during the year, or at any time," Bottner writes. "According to the Talmud, on Yom Kippur we can atone for sins between ourselves and God, but for our sins against people, we must seek forgiveness from those people and attempt to right any wrongs we may have committed."

Yom Kippur, or the Day of Atonement, is generally considered by Jews to be the holiest day of the year. It goes back to the days of Moses, and serves as a solemn reminder of the day that God forgave the Israelites for their sin of worshiping a golden calf.

The focal point of Yom Kippur is a full day — actually, nearly 26 hours — of fasting.

At the end of Yom Kippur's fasting is an elaborate feast, after which preparations begin for Sukkot, the Feast of Booths (or Tabernacles), a seven-day festival that celebrates God's protection of the Jews during their forty years of wandering in the wilderness. For these seven days, many Jews will build a sukkah, a three-sided booth made from a material that grows from the ground. During the week they will eat their meals in the sukkah — many will also sleep and socialize there.There is also a special traditional prayer that is given while holding four different kinds of branches — citron, palm, myrtle and willow — waving the branches in all directions, representing God's presence everywhere.

Rabbi Al Sulkes writes:

The rituals, prayers, meditations and deeds of the High Holy Days are designed to respond to a deep psychological need of all human beings to make some sense of their lives.

Yet as important as self-examination is, the other aspect is equally important.

It is never too late to turn your life around.

Contemplation must be followed by action.

Past is prologue, but what you do today and tomorrow is all that really matters.

Rabbi Sulkes told of another rabbi who taught her disciples that everyone should repent the day before they die. The disciples were perplexed and responded, "No one knows the day they are going to die."

The rabbi replied, "Then make every day a day of repentance."


My Prayer:

Father, I take time to worship You today, the beginning of Rosh Hashanah. I acknowledge You as the God of Creation.

May Your eternal plans and purposes for me -- plans for reconciliation, repentance, and forgiveness -- be accomplished in me and through me not just these next ten days but for as long as I am on this sacred journey.

In humility, I bow before You, seeking always to be a life-giver, an agent of blessing and a messenger of peace.



Sharing a special timely Rosh Hashanah message from a dear kingdom friend, Alberto:

Dear Special One,

In spite of worldwide conflicts, the Holy Spirit is guiding the true Church into its greatest season of transformation. We must not look at the pressures of our times as though they were obstacles set up to restrict us. For in the hands of the Almighty these are the very tools He is using to perfect us (see Chapter 6 of Francis Frangipane's This Day We Fight).

God is sifting through the multitude to get His 300 as in Gideon's time. He is going to refine us and remove the dross in order to make us pure, holy, and strong for our Kingdom Assignment.

He is training us to become like Navy Seals. Though tough and many quit, like Christ's disciples we shall remain with Him till His cross and will derive strength from Him to face ours as well.

Jesus Himself had to check if His disciples were with Him-- whether they understood Him, whether they still wanted to remain with Him. He asks His Special Ones the same thing. For those who have ears, that they will hear. In a way He is testing our hearing.

As we enter this Jewish New Year season, by God's mercy and grace, let us open ourselves to be filled with new wine from Jesus and the refreshing infilling of the Holy Spirit to go the next leg of our journey with Him.



Information on this post was taken from the following sources:

Deseret News, September 27, 2011

From Selichot to Simchat Torah

Rosh Hashanah 2011

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

A New Season, A New Name


Lydia of Philippi

photo source



On the Sabbath we went outside the city gate to the river, where we expected to find a place of prayer. We sat down and began to speak to the women who had gathered there. One of those listening was a woman from the city of Thyatira named Lydia, a dealer in purple cloth. She was a worshiper of God. The Lord opened her heart to respond to Paul’s message. When she and the members of her household were baptized, she invited us to her home. “If you consider me a believer in the Lord,” she said, “come and stay at my house.” And she persuaded us. (emphasis mine)
- Acts 16:13-15





Do not take advantage of the widow or the fatherless.
If you do and they cry out to me, I will certainly hear their cry.
My anger will be aroused, and I will kill you with the sword;
your wives will become widows and your children fatherless.

- Exodus 22: 22-24







Your assignment is not your decision
but your discovery.

- Mike Murdoch








Many of you are probably wondering why this blog has been quiet for the past three weeks. So, here is an entry to let you know what has been happening.

On August 31, I was in my bedroom in our Manila home, waiting before the LORD, asking Him for specific instructions for the next stage of my spiritual journey.

I had reached a fork in the road, a crossroads, and I needed His wisdom and His guidance to show me which way to go.

What He spoke to me was quite unexpected. He impressed on my heart that the season had come for me to begin using my given name, Lidia.

"You are entering your Lidia season," the Lord said. "No longer will you be known as Lidj - you will now be called by your given name, the name I have personally chosen for you."

It was such a defining moment for me when my heavenly Father clearly spoke these words - You are Lidia, a worshiper of God.


Earlier that morning I had felt like I was entering one of the saddest seasons of my life - when it seemed like yet another thing I had held dear in my life was being stripped away from me.

Yet the words God spoke had such a resonance in my heart... in fact, my heart surged with delight when I heard them.

On Friday of that same week, I attended my friend Rosemarie's 63rd birthday. Other dear friends - Tina, Alberto, and Gina were also there. These friends of mine and I have a kingdom connection, in fact we call each other by the name Kingdom Friend.

When Alberto saw me, his face lit up and said, "Hello Kingdom Friend, how are things with you?"

My immediate response was, "I have a new name. From now on, please call me Lidia." And I continued to share with him what has been happening, and what God has spoken to me.

That Sunday, Rosemarie and I attended the small but vibrant Spirit-filled church that Alberto pastors. He claims that he is not the pastor of this church, but God the Holy Spirit.

It is true. As we worshiped that morning, I could not keep my tears from falling. The songs that we sung were the very songs that God used to minister to my heavy heart...

Our Father...

It Is Well With My Soul...

The presence of the Holy Spirit was palpable in that place...

Many of us knelt in worship, and I was not the only one sobbing.

What a wonderful time of refreshing the worship was.

And to top it all, when their worship pastor Macky began to read the text for his message this morning, I was just so amazed. He spoke about worshiping God in the midst of our prisons...

Such a timely message for me... I know that God purposely brought me to that place to hear that specific word for me... for such a time as this.

And yes, Macky not only spoke about Paul and Silas worshiping God in their prison cell with their feet locked up in stocks...

He also spoke about a woman named Lydia, a seller of purple cloth... a worshiper of God.

So, here I am entering my Lidia Season.

I am taking up my position of worship... and definitely, I do not want to worship God from an empty water bottle, a cracked cistern that can hold no water... I want to worship God from a bottomless well!

Macky's passion for Jesus was so contagious!

Macky asked us many incisive questions:

What happens if praise and worship become your default settings?

When odds are against you, will you still praise the Lord?

Will you still decide to praise God -

when you are persecuted on the way to answering God's call on your life...

when you are being unjustly treated...

when it looks like the enemy has won?

God doesn't want us to be just "nice" and "good" Christians... He wants us to live out our purpose and kingdom calling in power and authority!

Praising God is the habit of those who want to walk in victory.

Macky talked a bit about the kind of training that navy seals go through. At some point in their training for endurance, they are "drownproofed" - letting them stay underwater for a long period of time to strengthen them for the war.

Praising God habitually is very much like drownproofing - it will keep us from being overwhelmed.

It spells all the difference between merely surviving, and overcoming!

This, in a nutshell, is where I am dear friends. I am in my Lidia season... where I am choosing the higher path of worship and praise. God is teaching me to fight my battles on my knees...

Down at the feet of my King, bowing before Him in worship, is the highest place... it is the place of breakthrough, it is the place of victory.


From now on, please call me Lidia.



Below are some photographs taken on our way to Boracay Island, September 15, 2011.
God really spoke to me through the beautiful way He painted the sky for me on that trip!


"Daybreak 1"
photo by Lidia


Taken on board the Montenegro roll on-roll off barge
before we disembarked at the Port of Dumangas, Iloilo province


"Daybreak 2"
photo by JT Ascalon


"Daybreak 3"
photo by Lidia


"Promise"
photo by Lidia

I was thrilled to see this rainbow along the way!



And here is a picture of me and my dear friend Desert Flower,
taken on our recent trip to Boracay Island last weekend.

I just had to post this photograph... it is a lovely picture of me
in my new season!

No, it's not about me...
it's about the story God is writing...
a story of faith and obedience...
the story of one woman's sacred pilgrimage
on her way to her eternal destination.


Desert Flower and me in Boracay
photo by JT Ascalon







But He knows the way that I take;
when He has tested me, I will come forth as gold.


- Job 23:10

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

When the Cloud Moves


Taken during my flight back to Manila
August 30, 2011






At the command of the LORD the children of Israel would journey, and at the command of the LORD they would camp; as long as the cloud stayed above the tabernacle they remained encamped.

Even when the cloud continued long, many days above the tabernacle, the children of Israel kept the charge of the LORD and did not journey.

So it was, when the cloud was above the tabernacle a few days: according to the command of the LORD they would remain encamped, and according to the command of the LORD they would journey.

So it was, when the cloud remained only from evening until morning: when the cloud was taken up in the morning, then they would journey; whether by day or by night, whenever the cloud was taken up, they would journey.

Whether it was two days, a month, or a year that the cloud remained above the tabernacle, the children of Israel would remain encamped and not journey; but when it was taken up, they would journey.

- Numbers 9:18-22



By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going.

- Hebrews 11:8






Another month comes to an end today. Yesterday I had to make a quick decision to go back to Manila although it had not even been a week since I was last here.

The plane took off at 5:30 in the afternoon, and my heart was just clinging to God for peace and protection. I prayed quietly during the entire flight, using my prayer language, for I had neither words nor energy to express the deep groans of my heart. My childlike request to my Abba Father was for Him to accompany me on this trip by sending me a strong angel to stand by my side, to protect me from the dark schemes coming from the kingdom of darkness.

As the plane descended on its initial approach to Manila, we experienced heavy turbulence, enough to make my insides churn. Outside the window I could see nothing but thick white clouds. There would be a few moments of stillness and I'd see patches of the sky, but before long, the plane would go through another thick cloud... and the turbulence was around us once again. I heard the whirring of the engines as the pilot tried to steady the aircraft.

We all heaved a sigh of relief as the plane touched down smoothly. It was 6:20 in the evening. The sun had already set, but there was still a bit of left over sunlight and the city was bathed in an eerie glow... like a surreal half-light. There was an unsettled peace in my heart as I walked out the terminal exit. I was still praying and holding on to Abba God.

I hurriedly walked towards Bay 12 where the shuttle buses were. Having had no time to prepare my suitcase, all I had was a backpack. But this turned out to my advantage because it was easy for me to take the fast train to reach my home. I boarded the shuttle bus, and in a few minutes I was at the train station.

It being the last day of a 4-day weekend, the trains were not full. On an ordinary weekday, the trains would have been jam packed. The ride lasted only about 25 minutes, but I was grateful for the peace that God gently wrapped around my heart as the train sped from station to station. It was not yet 8 p.m. when I reached home.

What an unexpected ending to this month! And yet, I had no doubt that things were happening for a purpose. I knew God has my life and my timetable in His hands. There was no inner struggle, only an ongoing prayer for Him to help me be a messenger of His peace.

I name this month Pilgrim.

A pilgrim is someone who embarks on a quest for something he considers sacred and of eternal significance.

Ray Stedman in his book Man of Faith says that a pilgrim can be identified by two symbols: a tent and an altar.

Referring to Abraham as the prototype man of faith, Pastor Stedman writes that pilgrims are tent dwellers who "hold material things loosely and are conscious of the fleeting, ephemeral values of what the world thinks important, a discontent with what the earth offers, and a hunger for something more."

They are also people whose lives are marked by prayer and true worship, building altars at significant stops in their journey. Such a man knows the prime importance of bending the knee and coming to a place of self-judgment regularly. He is aware of his constant need of cleansing; he never forgets his very life depends on God.

In a world where people bow before the altars of security, comfort and convenience, and live by the doctrine that material prosperity is the benchmark for success, those with pilgrim status are never highly esteemed. They are secretly looked down upon, probably even looked at with scorn and contempt.

But Jesus Christ Himself is the best example of a pilgrim while He lived here on earth. Foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have their nests, but the Son of God did not have a place on which to lay His head.

By faith, Abraham dwelt in tents with Isaac and Jacob... for he was looking forward to the city which has eternal foundations, whose builder and maker is God.



These days I am understanding what it means to live as a pilgrim for the remaining days of my short stay here on earth... to be like Abraham who looked forward to the city of unshakable foundations, and did not have a tight grip on the things of this world.

Jesus asks His followers this incisive question,

For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world,
and loses his own soul?


- Mark 8:36

The answer is clear. He who tries to save his own soul will lose it in the end.

What profit is there indeed, to be driven by an agenda called Self... when all along God is offering us the choice to live the Christ life in all its fullness and abundance?

There are crucial decisions we make moment by moment that shape us and eventually define who we really are...

My choices define who I am...
Like the Israelites who moved when the cloud moved, I once again make the decision as this month ends that I would rather be guided by the cloud of God's presence more than anything else in this world.

Clouds in the Bible often stood for many beautiful things... protection, favor, guidance.

Above all, clouds stood for God's glory. Whenever Moses communed with God in the Tent of Meeting, the cloud of God's presence covered it.

The pillar of cloud always went ahead of the people to make sure that they knew which way to go.

And now, God's cloud is once again moving in my life... and there are important decisions that need to be made.

God is indeed the only reliable Promise Keeper. He is completely trustworthy! He never turns back on His word. He will never fail or forsake me.

In Him alone do I put my trust. To Him alone will I look for the provisions of this pilgrimage I am on.

As another month ends, I am building an altar of worship before my God who remains faithful to the end.

It is His unwavering faithfulness that motivates me to remain faithful to Him as well.

And at the end of this earthly life, when the time comes to see God face to face, I know that the scales will tip in my favor. All I want to hear are the words of my Father, "Well done, good and faithful servant. Enter into the joy and the rest of My eternal kingdom."

Then my days as a pilgrim and a sojourner will finally be over.

Help me, dear Lord, to make choices that count for eternity.

As you are calling me to a higher level of Kingdom living, to come out of my places of comfort and earthly security, help me to live a life that reflects heaven's values and upside down economy...

I choose to live a life that brings glory to Your name alone.





This month my grandson Elijah turned nine months old.

Here is my prayer of blessing for this little one who has filled our home with so much joy and laughter!






On this your ninth month, dear grandson, I pray that you will understand what it means to be a pilgrim here on this earth.

May God give you a heart like Abraham who did not live with a sense of permanence, but set his sights toward his heavenly home.

In faith I declare that you will be a true worshiper of God... believing that there is always more of God to know and to discover.

May you always take your faith to the next level... may you grow up experiencing God as the God of signs and wonders.

I ask God that you will always be hungry and thirsty for more of Him, and that you will live not for what this world offers, but always reach out to God for more of Him.

Indeed, Elijah, may you never lose sight of your pilgrim status as you grow and walk the uphill path to maturity.


Praying always that we who are responsible for nurturing you will serve as godly models of faith for you to follow.

May you never settle into a life of comfort and ease where you will be satisfied with less than what God has purposed for you... but rather I pray that you will be willing to enter uncharted territories to advance the kingdom of God.

Indeed, I declare today that you will not drive the stakes of your tent too deep... but instead, will always be ready to move with the cloud.

Even at a tender age may you learn to discern accurately when the time has come to move on, and gladly follow God's cloud as it leads you, my dear little one.


I believe that God has heard the prayer of my heart for you today, Elijah!


Love always
Nana


Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Bitterness in the Garden of our Hearts


Bitterness in the Garden of our Hearts
by Francis Frangipane




See to it that no one comes short of the grace of God;
that no root of bitterness springing up causes trouble,
and by it many be defiled.

- Hebrews 12:15


It is impossible to pass through this world without being struck by injustice or heartache.Unless we process our struggles in Christ, a single wounding of our soul can create a deep bitterness within us, poisoning our very existence.

In my forty-plus years of ministry, I have known far too many Christians who have perfected the art of looking polite, while living inwardly with an angry, cynical or resentful spirit. They have swallowed the poison of bitterness and they are dying spiritually because of it. The problem is that, as Christians, we know it is wrong to react with open anger toward people. However, rather than truly forgiving and surrendering that injustice to God, we suppress our anger.

Anger is a result of perceived injustice. Suppressed anger always degrades into bitterness, which is, in reality, unfulfilled revenge.

Embittered People
The Bible not only provides the biographies of heroes of our faith, but it also documents the lives of common people, individuals who experienced the same kind of heartaches as we do. Some overcame wounding or loss and subsequent bitterness, while others became examples to avoid.

Consider Naomi from the book of Ruth. A famine in Israel led Naomi's family to migrate to Moab. Without family or friends to support her, as aliens in a foreign land, Naomi then suffered the loss of her husband; his death was followed by the death of her two grown sons. When Naomi returned to Israel with Ruth, her daughter-in-law, she announced to those who knew her, "Do not call me Naomi; call me Mara [bitter], for the Almighty has dealt very bitterly with me" (Ruth 1:20).

The name Naomi means "pleasant." We can imagine that when Naomi was dedicated to God as an infant, her parents prayed that her name would forecast her future. Now, however, the very opposite had occurred. Naomi was deeply embittered by her loss, to the extreme of blaming "the Almighty" for dealing "very bitterly" with her.

If you have ever listened to a bitter person, there is nothing "pleasant" about them. Yes, we should weep with those who weep, yet a bitter soul is a spirit trapped in a time warp; they live in the memory of their pain. Several years ago I met a woman who had suffered a difficult divorce. I talked with her every six months or so for two years, and each time we talked she said exactly the same negative things about her ex-husband. Although she was divorced from him, she was now married to a bitter spirit that held her captive to her heartache.

An embittered soul is one that continually blames someone else for their situation.

For Naomi, her bitterness was actually focused towards God. She was angry that He allowed hardship and loss in her life. "The Lord has brought me back empty" (Ruth 1:21). In effect she was saying, My sorrow is God's fault.

Contrast her life with that of Job's first encounter with loss (Job 1:1-22). Job lost his children and possessions, yet he bowed and worshiped: "The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord" (Job 1:21).

How we handle sorrow reveals the depth of our worship of God. When life cuts us, do we bleed bitterness or worship?

Job bowed and drew close to God. Naomi withdrew and talked about the Lord with her back to Him. I have dear friends who lost their only son when he was a teenager. In the midst of their heartache, they have become examples to everyone of true worship. Over the years, their pain actually purified and deepened their worship; their suffering made them more compassionate toward the suffering of others (See 2 Cor. 1:3-4).

I also know others who have suffered the sudden loss of a loved one and, within weeks, withdrew from God and became embittered. Adversity does not perfect character; it reveals character. It exposes what is happening inside of us.

Poisoned
In ancient times mankind experimented with vegetation, seeking to learn which plants were edible and which were poisonous. In his search, he discovered that, generally speaking, if a plant or fruit was sweet, it was usually safe to eat; bitter plants, man discovered, would either sicken or kill.

Likewise, the bitter experiences of life, if we ingest them into our spirits, can become a spiritual poison that destroys our hopeful expectations and attitudes. Such an experience may enter your soul via a relational wound or injustice; it can begin through a major disappointment or loss. However, once bitterness enters the human soul, like ink spreading in a glass of water, it can darken every aspect of our existence.

Indeed, not only can bitterness ruin our lives, Hebrews warns that a root of bitterness can "defile many" (Heb. 12:15 NIV).

A spiritual root of bitterness is a hidden, unresolved anger that is buried beneath the surface of our lives. Outwardly, we look "properly Christian" until we begin to discuss with others the situation where someone hurt us. As we speak, that root "springs up" and it defiles others. If you haven't dealt with your bitterness, beware when you speak to others, lest you defile them with your words. If you are listening to an embittered person, take heed that the spirit of bitterness is not being transferred to your life as well!

Neglect
In Genesis we find another bitter soul in Esau, the brother of Jacob. Esau had foolishly bargained away his inheritance when he was young and then lost his father's blessing when he was old. When Esau discovered he had lost both to his brother Jacob, the Bible tells us he "cried out with an exceedingly great and bitter cry" (Gen. 27:34).

To lose something through our laziness or neglect can create bitterness of soul. Additionally, to have someone deceive us and take what was rightfully ours is equally as destructive. I know people who were lazy and did not esteem their education. Today they are bitter employees working for minimum wage. I also know young, unwed mothers who let deceitful boys steal their virginity, which later also embittered them. Even spiritual people can find themselves suffering with bitterness caused by neglect. I know a pastor who was so devoted to his ministry, he consistently neglected his wife. She finally divorced him. Cry and plead with her as he would, he suffered the bitter loss of his wife, the emotional estrangement of his kids, and the respect of his church.

Esau's loss made him very bitter. Yet, have we, like Esau, lost the more valuable elements of life because of our neglect? Have others received blessings that were earmarked for us, and has that loss created bitterness within us?

May the Lord reveal to us these roots of bitterness that, like time-released poison, are quietly killing us.

God desires to return to us our ability to love and laugh again. Let us, therefore, sincerely approach the throne of God's grace and ask Him to show us the garden of our hearts. Yes, and let us see if our souls are truly free of the root of bitterness.


Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Re-creating Your Environment

Spring

photo source




... in humility value others above yourselves,
not looking to your own interests
but each of you to the interests of the others.
In your relationships with one another,
have the same mindset as Christ Jesus...

- Philippians 2:3-5





Journal Entry: NAIA Terminal 3, Manila, August 24, 2011, 12:45 p.m.

I am here at the Chaikofi Brewing Lounge of the NAIA Terminal 3. In about an hour I will board my flight back to my home city of Bacolod.


Within these few uninterrupted moments I want to quiet my heart and put my thoughts to words, enjoying the unhurried time and private space available to me in this little corner of the busy airport.

Upon waking up at 4:30 this morning, I knelt before God, and spoke heart to heart with Him. In this new season of my life I have a fresh determination to draw even nearer. I will not be satisfied with standing at the fringes of His glory. My desire is to be near where the king is seated in all His glory and royal regalia.

I want to behold Him in the beauty of His holiness... and take the necessary steps in that direction.

It is an ongoing journey, I look at it as my sacred pilgrimage, this shaping and molding of my character that it may become more and more like my Master’s heart.

There are seasons when I make quick and steady progress... but sometimes it takes longer.

To keep moving on means dealing with the distractions, and hindrances along the way.

All I really want is to go through life as an agent of reconciliation...

with a heart open to learn what there is to learn, for admittedly I, too, have many areas of blindness...

a willingness to walk in humility, beyond the first mile...

and giving what I can -- not out of my limited store of material provisions, but from the wellspring of God’s love... gifts of sincerity and kindness.

But there are times when the gifts I offer are not good enough, because what the other desires can be satisfied by no one else but God alone.

Only God is able fill the deepest longing of the human heart. No man can ever meet such a deep need.

Look to a mere human to address that need – and the result is an idol created in the image of what the heart is longing for... be it a person, a perfect situation, a thing.

And, a false god is not only powerless to bring change... it never truly satisfies.

There will always be one more thing missing, another thing gone wrong. Somehow others will always fall short.

But there are no lasting earthly solutions to the human dilemma. Only divine interventions.


I worshiped God this morning not with many words, but with tears.

I came to Him in need of a deep spiritual cleansing from the defilement of spoken words... demeaning and maligning words.

My Lord God met me with open arms; He embraced me with compassion and understanding.

To God I lifted up my daughter, still fast asleep on the other bed. A mother’s love goes very deep, but I can’t always be there for her. How thankful I am that God’s love goes deeper still.

Hide us in the cleft of Your rock, my Lord.

Because the lens we use to look at others is shattered by the Fall, we always have an incomplete picture, and our perspective will always be clouded.

Only God has an eternal vantage point, He sees all angles.

Break through, dear God... break through for the ones I love.

I thanked my Father for teaching me to walk the path of understanding.

For giving me the ability to listen, not to another person’s spoken words, but the unspoken words of the heart...

not with judgment, not even self-protection... but with compassion.

I prayed the mercy prayer, Father forgive them for they know not what they do.

You can re-create your environment, My child. These are the words I heard God speaking in my spirit.

You have received power and authority to re-create the spiritual climate around you.

To be an agent of reconciliation is a high calling.

To speak words of life, imparting grace to the hearer. Sometimes words are not even necessary... the spiritual atmosphere can be positively charged by constructive silence, the silence that heals and seeks to understand.

In everything showing honor and deference.

There is great power in honor.

Honor is the language and conduct of royalty!

Showing honor is the mark of nobility and kingly status!

With my words I want to weave
a tapestry of beautiful memories to warm the hearts
of those I will someday leave behind.

A legacy of honor. That is what I want to leave behind.

I believe my prayers have found favor in God’s eyes.


I quickly went down to prepare a simple breakfast of cheese and garlic omelette, steamed rice, kefir, and fruit. It was a mother’s little way of saying good-bye to her youngest child and only daughter. When Obedient One comes home tonight, I will already be back in Bacolod.

Before walking out the door, my daughter hugged me and gave me that sweet smile – reserved for me alone. Despite the many life lessons she still needs to learn she knows my love for her is unconditional... that I will always try to understand. She is secure in knowing that I give her enough room to grow.



We all go through learning seasons... My most valuable lessons were always learned the hard way. At 58, I have not only learned, but also unlearned, many things. Nevertheless, much spiritual ground remains to be discovered and experienced. I am a lifelong learner, God's masterpiece in the making.

And I have no doubt that this young woman, just like me, is going through her learning seasons as well. God has a special curriculum and timetable for her, for me... for any one who is willing to be taught.


Again I prayed a short prayer for her: Hide her in the cleft of Your rock, my God. Thank you that she has an obedient, teachable heart.



After breakfast I spent some time in our backyard. My maid Irene and I cut off dead leaves and added compost material to the potted plants. We pruned the bushes and loosened up the soil around the plants. More work remains to be done. Gardening is a process...to be enjoyed it must be done in stages. There is always a time of waiting involved.

... Hope rose in my heart as I realized that the time I spent in the garden was a picture of what God was doing in the garden of my relationships.

It is a new season, I can feel it in the air.

See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the wilderness
and streams in the wasteland.

- Isaiah 43:19

A way out of the wilderness... streams in the wasteland... yes, indeed!

Making a choice to overlook the pain, and entrusting the difficult situation to God... it is easier said than done. But this is always my desire - to be a woman of peace... to be free to bring my relationships to a higher level.

Layers of deep-seated dirt, accumulated through the years, in the natural as in the spiritual, are being exposed.

Yes, indeed we can re-create the spiritual climate in which we operate – by taking a proactive stand and choosing to speak words that give honor... words that heal, never words that demean and devalue.

Conflicts... they need not be the hindrance. They can be the platform for growing in grace and humility.

My dear friend Bill Mills once said, "We can go through anything with one another."

How true! I create the climate for my relationships; it is my responsibility to cultivate the seedbed on which my relationships thrive and grow to maturity.


Before long my bags were ready and it was time to say goodbye to my sister. We do not see each other too often, and I was grateful for the brief time we had together.

Lord, may it be eternally spring in the garden of our hearts, I prayed as we parted ways.

I believe that in heaven it will be eternally spring... the same environment I seek to cultivate in my relationships.

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD my Rock and my Redeemer.

Eternally spring! What a marvelous promise!


View from my window seat as the plane approached the runway of the Bacolod Silay National Airport. Joy and delight seemed to leap from the greenery of the agricultural lands that greeted my eyes. It has never felt so good to be back home!


Wednesday, August 10, 2011

The Standpoint of Abundance



The Widow's Offering

photo source




As Jesus looked up, he saw the rich putting their gifts into the temple treasury. He also saw a poor widow put in two very small copper coins. “Truly I tell you,” he said, “this poor widow has put in more than all the others. All these people gave their gifts out of their wealth; but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on.”

- Luke 21:1-4




Do not love the world or the things in the world.
If anyone loves the world,
the love of the Father is not in him.
For all that is in the world—
the lust of the flesh,
the lust of the eyes,
and the pride of life—
is not of the Father but is of the world.
And the world is passing away, and the lust of it;
but he who does the will of God abides forever.

- 1 John 2:15-17






It's only been twenty days since I returned from Manila, but it seems like so long ago.

Praise God indeed for the gift of time! In this brief span of time that I have been back in my home city of Bacolod, I accomplished many things. With much joy I had lots of bonding time with family -- my two grandsons, Matthew (Forerunner) and Elijah (Full of Hope/Mighty Warrior)... my sons First Born and Worshiper, and my daughters in law God-given and Chosen One.

Matt and his Nana


First Born and his son Matt


Elijah right after a bath


me and my grandsons Elijah and Matt


The Sunday after I arrived, we had a joint birthday celebration for God-given and Chosen One whose birthdays were both in July.


Chosen One and God-given, my beautiful and precious daughters in law!


There were many opportunities to spend time with my church friends and my Family Foundations ministry family!


Dinner at Grill Guru with my friend Pong and her daughter Kristel


Pat and me after an Ancient Paths seminar



And I am sure my garden was happy to have me back.







But what gave me the greatest joy was to receive a clear word from the Lord about the next step I was to take in my spiritual journey.

About a month ago, while meditating on the Scripture passage found in Luke 21:1-4, I had a sense that this was the message God was speaking to me. Ever since my husband passed away in November 2008, I had been asking God to direct my steps.

I knew I had to begin earning an income sooner or later. It cannot be denied that I am competent in many areas, and there were several options available to me. But I wanted to go through the right doors regarding this... and asked God for His peace and confirmation before I made any final decision.





In the story of the widow putting in her last two copper coins into the offering, Jesus emphasized that it was all she had to live on.

I asked God to speak to me, and He did! It seemed like He was telling me to give Him all I had to live on. To give Him my abilities, and to trust Him with the rest.

It was a total abandon... a total surrender of my life to the work of His kingdom.

It is easy to live life from the perspective of lack... but Jesus surprised me by opening my eyes to this amazing truth -- He is calling me to trust Him as my Shepherd and experience what it means to live from the standpoint of abundance and provision.

He makes me lie down in green pastures!

He leads me beside the still waters!

He leads me in paths of righteousness!

He prepares a table before me in the presence of my enemies!

He anoints my head with oil!

My cup runs over!

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life... and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever!





So much peace flooded my soul, and this is where I am now, grateful for the confirmation from His word.

His word washes over me like a cleansing flood, removing doubt and double mindedness.

This takes me to a new phase in my kingdom journey. I return to Manila tonight with the assurance tucked in my heart that God hears me when I call... He directs my steps... He makes my way secure.




Call to me and I will answer you and tell you
great and unsearchable things you do not know.

- Jeremiah 33:3





He also brought me out into a broad place;
He delivered me because He delighted in me.

- Psalm 18:19




You enlarged the path under me,
So my feet did not slip.

- Psalm 18:36



The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail.

- Isaiah 58:11



This post is lovingly dedicated to Elaine Olsen of Peace for the Journey .
Through her obedience, God has spoken to my heart a much needed confirmation.
Thank God for you, Elaine!